he's dying and he wants me to stay away?

Philippines
April 30, 2008 9:32pm CST
my boyfriend has this rare blood disease... i've tried to be strong for him and i've been supportive all throughout his ordeal. But now he wants to break up with me... He said he lost his lust for life. He doesnt want me to have a zombie boyfriend... He asked me this: "Would you rather lose me to death?" I said yes. I'd rather stay beside him til the last day of his life rather than give up... What would you do if you were in my sitch?
9 people like this
29 responses
@zed_k4 (17619)
• Singapore
1 May 08
First of all, I would like to say that you are such a good girlfriend and your boyfriend is indeed very lucky to have you by his side. He is perhaps saying that because he doesn't want to pull you down with him in this fight for the disease. He wants you to be happy and I think that he loves you tremendously for him to say that. Like the saying goes, "If you love that person, you have to let that person go".
• Philippines
2 May 08
what about fighting for love?
2 people like this
@zed_k4 (17619)
• Singapore
8 May 08
I would fight for love, if she is worth fighting for.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
12 May 08
thats precisely my point. he's fighting for, thats why im fighting to stay beside him.
2 people like this
@KrauseHome (36663)
• United States
1 May 08
Wow!! This is so sad. Sounds like people need to start Praying for a Miracle for this man. To be dying from something like this must be rough. If I were you, I would try and find ways to let him know you still are there for him, and be supportive of him, and for him even if it has to be from a distance. Sometimes that might be easier said than done, but sometimes that is what is best. Wishing you the Best. This surely cannot be easy.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
1 May 08
Please do pray for him...
1 person likes this
@lovenluck (1068)
• India
1 May 08
Well this is what we call true love i suppose ,your boyfriend care for you and wants to go away from him and you love him and wants to stay with him in the toughest phase of his life. you two have got what most people dream for but cannot get it so don't let it go away ,stay with each other and enjoy this eternal feeling.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
1 May 08
thank you for that...thats a realization. yeah, many people dream of finding true love and we've found each other already. but its a lot difficult than I thought...
1 person likes this
@flamenca (82)
• Canada
1 May 08
I would do the same as you.. My boyfriend had to have chemo and radio therapy for a tumor.. They had to stop as it was burning him inside.. so the tumor is still there and they wanted to remove his bladder and rectum!! His bladder is in perfect shape... so we left the doctor's office and we talked and said that we would rather have less time together than less quality time as he would have to have two bags attached to his body. He will always remember you at his side, feeling that he was not abandoned and that he is loved and this love shall always remain in the ethers..in the Universe... It is difficult at times but it is truly a lesson in giving .. Flamenca
1 person likes this
• Philippines
1 May 08
so how is your boyfriend now..? he feels that he'll be a burden and that he'll just cause me pain...i hope he realizes that I just want to be there with him through all this....
1 person likes this
@qtfrog99 (279)
• United States
1 May 08
First let me start by sending my prayers your way. I would do exactly what you are doing. It sounds like he is distancing himself from those who love him to try to make it easier for you, unfortunately he does need everyone who loves him around him during this time, no matter how strong he seems, he will always need someone to talk to.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
1 May 08
thank you for the prayers... i hope he realizes that soon...
1 person likes this
• United States
1 May 08
i would stay with him all the way through it. i would never leave my boyfriend just because something like that. if you love him stay with him till the end :)
1 person likes this
• Philippines
1 May 08
thats what i wanted to do...but he wants me to leave him...
1 person likes this
@mansha (6301)
• India
17 May 08
tough situation but yes I would still stick with him. No matter what he says. Ask him what he would have done if it was you in the same situation or if you were married to him. When you ove a person I am sure as he loves you, you want only the best for you, its his love that wants to protet you from pain and suffering . But do not leave him and be strong for him. I will pray for him to have the strength to deal with his sufferings.
1 person likes this
• Kottayam, India
17 May 08
stay with him as much as possible
1 person likes this
@subha12 (18449)
• India
5 May 08
its very sad to hear. at the same time hats off to you. you truly love the guy and so you are beside him at last times. its called true love. best of luck.
1 person likes this
• India
5 May 08
Yeah i would have done the exact same thing if i was in ur position. So it seems you love him dearly, so just say to him clearly that u love him and ur with him no matter what. Just ask him to have hope, and miracles do happen. Tell him that he has many , who love him, and who would love to be with him, that hez gotta realise that and hope for a better future. I hope whatever he has is curable.....
1 person likes this
• United States
5 May 08
Grant him his wishes. He loves you enough for you to have a better life. He probably gets upset with you if he has lost his will to live, If you love him let go, hard to do. But I think he would feel better as well.. Let you him know that you love him and go on.. Give him the peace to pass as he wishes.
1 person likes this
@katisaurus (1038)
• Canada
2 May 08
Exactly what you did.. I dated a guy who has (still has) Stomach cancer. When I was inlove with him and didn't think he was gonna make it to the end of August, I stuck by him every second. when he tried to break up with me because he didn't want me to go through the pain of losing him like that, I told him I wasn't going anywhere. We eventually broke up a few weeks later 'cause he accused me of lying and cheating on him. and even though I think he did it to get rid of me I fell out of love wwith him just because he had no trust in me and trust is a huge deal for me.
1 person likes this
• United States
2 May 08
First off, let me say... I'm sorry for what is happening to you. I do, however, support you! You are doing the right thing. If I were you, I would stick with him through everything, until the very end, and show him all the love in the world. Explain to him that you need him and will always love him, no matter what comes along. Be strong!
1 person likes this
@zpanmei (60)
1 May 08
i would do the exact same thing what you have done! you are a brave girl. i think loving someone do not have anything to do with the body. its being together in the world of our immortal souls! you should show him that loving him wasn't a deal that last only when we are alive, it is beyond that too. stay strong. i pray everything will be fine!
1 person likes this
@lingli_78 (12834)
• Australia
1 May 08
i wouldn't want to leave him as well if i am in your position... i am sorry to hear about your situation... he will need all the support that he can get from you especially in his conditions now... just try to explain to him how you are feeling and tell him that you want to stay at his side until his last day... take care and God Bless you...
1 person likes this
@busta1baby (1230)
• United States
1 May 08
u need to stay there with him even if he pushes u away
1 person likes this
• India
1 May 08
I would hav given the best of my time and space for his last days..I would give him all of myself and try to make us enjoy our last days meaningfully and blissfully.I think id do exactly like you...sticking on this the end. I hope things get better and he gets the best of treatment.take care
1 person likes this
• India
1 May 08
Be with him untill he is alive . And give him happiness .... He is in deep crisis of metal stability and he needs care of you. He will try to make a distance from due to his thinking of those crisis ....but if we love some one , its our duty to do care of that person in this condition .... thanks !!!
1 person likes this
• United States
1 May 08
I would be just like you and want to stay by his side. That's what you do when you are in love. I am sorry the two of you are going through this. I know it can't be easy. I wish you both the best.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
1 May 08
uhm.. i think i've known much story the same in your situation....havin a boyfriend dying is really hard.. BUT as his partner and love him that much as you wanted to feel the same in his illness you know what to do JUST UNDERSTAND him right now and every time..for all of his feeling now is self-pity.....just remember that LOVE conquers all... @jam@ ~haPPy Day~
1 person likes this