personality adjustments are free!! do you need one?
By dloveli
@dloveli (4366)
United States
September 24, 2008 7:51am CST
I was on my way home from work yesterday. I was on the bus. I watched as each person got on or off. Not one person said "thank you" or "have a nice day". ARE YOU SERIOUS?? When I was little the words ROAD RAGE were non existent. Whats happening to us. Other countries view us as rude as well. THey may be right. I have been in stores where people push and shove. What we need to realize is that we shouldnt be yelling at others or pushing our way thru a line. What are we teaching our children? I was in line for coffee and not one person said "may I have". Everyone said the exact same thing, " get me". Its because people mimic. They see the person in front getting over by saying "get me". They want the same type of service so they say"get me" and on and on and on...... We learn by examples. When was the last time we waited without the "OH my gosh! I cant believe they havent go to me yet" or " I shouldnt have to wait, I come here all the time". Come on people we all want to get what we want and go. Hence the reason for a line. I bet if we all said please and thank you on a regular basis that it would become the norm once again. I think that there's nothing worse than being treated badly by anyone, especially a complete stranger. Someone whom you dont know. How about you? What do you think? Have you seen people being rude for no reason? We dont realize that everyone has issues no just us. If you have a bad day keep it to yourself. Dont ruin it for everyone. For me, It makes me feel good when someone says thank you or please. try it!!!
5 people like this
14 responses
@Lakota12 (42600)
• United States
24 Sep 08
We always say thiank you and please and have also taught grand d aughter to do the same.
and I have been in line at places and people try to break line I tell them get to the back.
with no please to it .
BUt say thanks to who ever waits on me.
1 person likes this
that would be fun to watch and for you to see it would be most wonderful for you.@dloveli (4366)
• United States
25 Sep 08
There's a big difference with saying thank you for service and telling someone thanks for trying to cut me in line. NOT! You are absolutely right in not saying thank you. YOu should have said Fxxx YOU! Sorry about that. Its gets me so mad how shady some people try to be. When people do this to me I call them on it. The last time I was helping at a food bank. THis little, sweet elderly woman was waiting so patiently in line for her bags of food. This other family who trys to take advantage of the whole food bank thing anyways, walked up and stood right in front of her. THe poor old woman didnt say a word. I said to myself Hell no! I walked up and told them to go to the end of the line. They were shocked. No one had ever approached them before. THey tried to cut three more times then they were told if they did it again they had to leave. ARE YOU SERIOUS? These people were in there 20's. THey brought five people just to get an extra bag of food. THen when they got their bag, NO PLEASE OR THANK YOU's. Can u believe it? Its embarassing to think how far people will go to get over on the system. I hope they get what they deserve. Eventually someone will do to them what they have done to others. I only hope I will be there to see it!LOL dl
@savypat (20216)
• United States
24 Sep 08
I so agree with you, each of us as individuals can change the world if we will only
think of blessing each other in our hearts, this expressed as common curtesy or the good old do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Is this so hard to do? Do we have to have a material payoff in order to do this? Like you and Cosby say Come On People. Tghanks
1 person likes this
@dloveli (4366)
• United States
25 Sep 08
Its sad to see the youngsters of today taking something without saying please, may I , or thank you. I would never take anything without asking and saying please. If we practice a polite dialogue, others will follow. Imitation is the finest form of flattery. It does take an entire village to raise a child. However, I dont think its fair to put it on society the fact that your child is impolite. We have to take responsibility. I have seen it so many times. Someone gives a child a dollar or some candy and the child takes it and runs. No thank you or nothing. WHo's fault is that? You then hear the parent say " he/she gets that from her father/mother. Let's play the blame game. thanks dl
@savypat (20216)
• United States
25 Sep 08
I think what is lacking is responsibility snd basic respect for all others. I can count on one hand the thank you notes I've gotten from my Grandchildren, I would not have dared forget to thank my Grandparents or parents for anything they did for me. We have just gotten out of the habit and that's not good
@lilaclady (28207)
• Australia
24 Sep 08
yes it was once an automatic thing to say thank you or please but today people just take everything for granted. It is very sad, even presents for birthdays and Christmas people don't think they have to say thank you any more, I think it is very sad...
@dloveli (4366)
• United States
25 Sep 08
I think I notice it more because I work in the service industry. I just think the fact that two simple words can change a persons attitude should be taken more seriously. I may have had an argument before I came to work. That doesnt mean I can take it out on all my customers. I make a point to shake it off. I have literally seen it where a person came in frowning and because of a nice comment left smiling. For example there's this guy that comes in every morning for a large iced. Every morning he has the same exact look on his face. Very serious looking. ALmost unhappy. For the last week and a half I have made it a point to make him smile or at least try. Yesterday he came in and looks at me with the same face then all of a sudden puts on this great big toothless smile. I wanted to cry. I know its only one person. It has to start somewhere. When people see him smiling thay may notice that he is even happy and it may rub off. who knows. I do know this. Change cant take place if some one doesnt start it somewhere. I honestly believe it starts at home. Teaching our children about PLEASE and THANK YOU'S. DL
@positiveminded1977 (7072)
• India
26 Sep 08
I try to say please and thank you most of the time, but in crowded buses? Impossible to even remember I am a human being on crowded buses. Politeness is for times when the condition is good. Isn't it a sort of luxury? I can't imagine myself being too polite in crowded, poor conditions, in traffic snarls, and so on. :)
Cheers and happy mylotting
1 person likes this
@dloveli (4366)
• United States
26 Sep 08
its not just about please and thank you. its about common decency. As far as the bus is concern,you could offer an elderly person a seat. Maybe try not to push. Its not that simple. there are tons of ways you can express courtesy. as far as the crowded issues or the traffic snarls are concerned we wouldn't have them if people treated each other with some dignity. thanks for responding
D.L.
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
24 Sep 08
You are absolutely right! I had witnessed the same thing. I try not to be rude...and sometimes when a clerk apologizes to me for me having to wait I say...no big deal I am not in a hurry but thanks for recognizing me....and I always say thank you...or please. Another thing I have noticed is that people don't send thank you's anymore! That needs to be addressed too.....good discussion!
1 person likes this
@dloveli (4366)
• United States
25 Sep 08
GIrl you are soooooo right. I forgot about the thank you cards. When I was young and had a birthday party my mom made me read the card first then open the gift. As I opened the gift I had to hold it up so everyone could see and tell who it was from. Most importantly I had better had said thank you or else. I was at a party recently. THe child literally snatched the present out of the mothers hand and began to rip the paper without a care in the world. NO thank you or nothing. THe mother said absolutely nothing. I dont think she even knew that he should say thank you. THere's a problem!!!!! We have to begin at home. If every one teaches their children manners we may succeed in having a courteous polite conversation sometime in the next century. Thanks for understanding. Happy MyLotting. dl
@magojordan (3252)
• Philippines
25 Sep 08
I agree with you that most people forget their manners. Too bad most people don't value that anymore and the bad thing is that they don't know that they are ruining other people's day. Too bad too that some people who got old instead of being the ones who should set examples, they are the one who are becoming bad examples. I see old people actually yell at others for very simple reasons like getting an old bill instead of a crisp one as a change for a purchase. For me it doesn't mean that if you are older then you are wiser and all that you do is good. For me doing good could be done by anyone regardless of age.
@dloveli (4366)
• United States
26 Sep 08
Where the elderly are concerned, I think its just an issue of being frustrated that they are getting older.My grandmother was that way. SHe became very irritated an would begin yelling at everyone. COme to find out it was her way of hiding the fact that she could no longer hear well. I do think there are exceptions. Doing well at any age is a wonderful thing. Its up to us what we view as acceptable behavior. I think if every did just one random act of kindness per day it would catch on. WHo knows? Maybe I'm a dreamer. thanks dl
@ronaldinu (12422)
• Malta
25 Sep 08
I hate it when commuters are rude and push their way forward without waiting for their turn. It is unbelievable how egoistic we have become and we cannot wait in a queue for a few minutes until our turn comes.
@checapricorn (16061)
• United States
24 Sep 08
[i]Hi dloveli,
I haven't meet anyone yet or encounter any person like that..IN public places where I am, everyone seems to be very kind and good..I hear it a lot, all the kinds words that are being exchanged!
But, when I was working before, I met a lot of young kids who aren't using this magic words and I am sure the family has a great influence for such attitude![/i]
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
25 Sep 08
I see it and deal with it all the time. I work in the public. nothing will teach you quicker on how to treat people than being on the other side of the counter. I don't think some people have any idea what it is like to be in such a position where you have to be polite no matter how darn rude they are to you. It is quite challenging but humbling as well. I agree that there is no excuse to be rude but some people don't know any better...it'll always be there so the best way is to know how to deal with them and not resort to rudeness yourself.
@Barbietre (1438)
• United States
25 Sep 08
I used to work in a clothing shop. One day as I was saying the usual, "thank you for your business, come again, and have a nice day" to a customer. He went off on a rant and told me it was none of my Da** f**king business what kind of day he had and if he wanted to have a horrible day he would. I was shocked to say the least, but said "whatever you want sir" He still went off on a tirade that he did not like being greeted blindly by people and fake kindness. What a jerk!
@apples99 (6556)
• United States
25 Sep 08
Yes Iv seen and experienced a lot of rude behavior and I just dont understand some people
I and, like you I was taught to say please and thank-you and even if I'm in a bad mood I try not to take it out on others and people, and I think some people do, need a personality transplant.
I and, like you I was taught to say please and thank-you and even if I'm in a bad mood I try not to take it out on others and people, and I think some people do, need a personality transplant. 
@mooMan101 (69)
•
25 Sep 08
I tend to say thank you when take the ticket getting on, but not when I get off. Also when ordering I say "Could I have... please." I also hold doors open for people now and then.
But the one thing I hate is when boarding an aeroplane at the gate, the ground staff are checking boarding passes, passports etc. or just before and the person behind you inches their way forward into you, and when you stand your ground and don't get pushed forward, they just keep pushing... you're at the gate, in the queue, the plane will not leave without you.
@jazel_juan (15747)
• Philippines
25 Sep 08
Hi! yes, i agree with what you said, people should still practice saying those precious words. I often teach my kids to always say "please, thank you, i'm sorry" it is those words that make you feel warm and grateful.
Here in the place where i work, we have someone who operates the elevator, i dont forget to always thank her everytime i use the elevator. I mean at least she knows she is appreciated and not ignored.
So i hope everyone can still say such words wherever they go:)) whatever they do:D
