Cheaters...

@dawnald (84070)
Shingle Springs, California
November 21, 2008 3:07pm CST
Enough boring discussions, here's another controversial one. Who in your mind is worse, the married person who cheats on their spouse, or the single person who is cheating with them? Why?
3 people like this
15 responses
@Sillychick (3279)
• United States
21 Nov 08
The married spouse is worse. He or she is the one who made a commitment to be faithful to their spouse. The single person may be a jerk who gets a kick out of scoring with someone who is already taken- but they have no loyalty to the spouse of the cheater. Unless of course that spouse is their best friend or sibling... but I digress. That's a different topic altogether.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84070)
• Shingle Springs, California
21 Nov 08
I suspect most people are going to agree with you. I'm on the fence about this one myself. Still thinking about it...
• United States
21 Nov 08
I would like to add that if the single person goes looking specifically for married people to hook up with, for the purpose of the challenge or to hurt people, then they are just as bad. But that does not take away from the responsibility of the married person to be faithful to his or her spouse.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84070)
• Shingle Springs, California
21 Nov 08
true
@hildas (3031)
25 Nov 08
The single person has lead the married man astray and should no not to take someone elses property. She is certainly the worst in my eyes. The married man knows right from wrong also, but he is easily lured and tempted by an attractive younger women. It has to be the single person Dawn in my opinion.
@dawnald (84070)
• Shingle Springs, California
25 Nov 08
I think you are the only person to say so. Myself, I think both are equally bad.
@sid556 (30997)
• United States
26 Nov 08
well, I think you are wrong. I was a single woman and I got drawn in by a married man. I was SINGLE. The guy came to me on his own and yes..i was attracted. I ended up falling hard for him. I felt too guilty to continue with it and I was the one that broke it off. It was really hard and it hurt for a long time. Their marriage ended but it was not because of me. Their marriage was already pretty gone or he would not have come after me. I am not at all blaming her as I have no idea of the dynamics of their relationship. The person that is married is guiltier, i think. That person owes it to his/her spouse to be faithful and not be led into temptations which are everywhere. When I was in a committed relationship and love ...there was no one no matter how hot they were that could possibly convince me to stray. I will say that as much as I fell for this man....I could also see what he was about...there was no way that I would ever ever be his wife or even live in girlfriend. I had enough insight to see that much about him. Even If I'd have been the one to come on to him....the very fact that he gave in would be enough to tell me that I would not want to be his wife.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84070)
• Shingle Springs, California
26 Nov 08
Again, I'm assuming that both people did know, if one didn't that's a different situation!
1 person likes this
@scorpio19 (1363)
22 Nov 08
Hi, I think they are both as bad as each other, wrong is wrong in my eyes and if your not happy in a relationship then there are better ways to end it.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84070)
• Shingle Springs, California
22 Nov 08
Yeah, you should try and work it out with your partner before you get involved with somebody else. Doesn't always work out that way though.
@scorpio19 (1363)
22 Nov 08
well yes that's true, it's ok us discussing such a subject not so clear cut if your actually in the situation.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84070)
• Shingle Springs, California
22 Nov 08
Right, people have issues and don't always handle things the best way...
@rocketj1 (6960)
• United States
21 Nov 08
They are equally as bad. Mainly because it is a selfish person that does either of these things.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84070)
• Shingle Springs, California
21 Nov 08
Well that is a good point!
@sid556 (30997)
• United States
26 Nov 08
what if the single person is not aware at the start that the other person is married? That does happen you know. It happens a lot. I am single...i see it a lot.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84070)
• Shingle Springs, California
26 Nov 08
different situation - I am assuming that they both knew
@Galena (9123)
21 Nov 08
the married person who is cheating, because they are the OATHBREAKER. and in my religion, an Oathbreaker is among the worse things you can do.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84070)
• Shingle Springs, California
21 Nov 08
Maybe so but in some cases the other person is a predator!
@Galena (9123)
21 Nov 08
all the same, predator or not, the other person is just out for what they want. the other has broken an Oath. which is far greater a crime.
1 person likes this
@mariposaman (2967)
• Canada
26 Nov 08
Both are equally to be condemned. The married person knows or should know the hurt he or she will inflict on the spouse if the spouse finds out about the affair and the other party who is cheating with the married one knows about this potential hurt too. There is the lying and deceit I cannot agree with on both parties. I do not know why but women seem to like married men but they should know better. They will either spend their child bearing years being second fiddle to his wife or if the marriage breaks up and she marries him, he will repeat the cheating ways on her and find another girlfriend. I might add that it is not always a married person cheating with a single person. Two married persons not married to each other can cheat too with the potential of destroying two marriages. Strangely enough married men who cheat are branded as pigs yet married women who cheat are sympathetically portrayed as unfulfilled. It seems to always be the man's fault.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84070)
• Shingle Springs, California
26 Nov 08
There are reasons why people cheat and it's not always the man's fault...
@sid556 (30997)
• United States
26 Nov 08
Of course both are guilty but the difference being...the married person has made and broken a committment to another person whereas the single person has not. Without question the married person is guiltier. Sadly...I would bet the single person would be the one to feel the most guilt.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84070)
• Shingle Springs, California
26 Nov 08
If the single person knew they were married and they are the one that sought the relationship out? And as for who feels guiltier, I think that depends on the person and their upbringing more than whether they're the married person or not.
@joy4you (641)
• India
25 Nov 08
The married person who cheats is worse than the single person who cheats with them. The married person has the excuse of a commited relationship not to cheat but if they do that means they are the worse of the 2 cheaters, the single person has nothing to loose, he/she will just go along with it and if the affair breaks then just find someone else with no moral responsibility involved, or so they think.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84070)
• Shingle Springs, California
25 Nov 08
But of course there's a moral responsibility, but the single person may get away without having to deal with it!
@Nhey16 (2518)
• Philippines
21 Nov 08
the married one, but if the single one knows that his/her partner is cheating the wife/husband, then he/she is also worse...
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84070)
• Shingle Springs, California
21 Nov 08
both sez I
@mcat19 (1357)
• United States
21 Nov 08
Both are guilty. Especially if they are aware that one is married. One is aware, but he/she may have lied to the other. Then, maybe I'd temper my judgment.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84070)
• Shingle Springs, California
21 Nov 08
Yeah there could definitely be lies involved. If one is lying to the spouse, why not the fling also?
@sudalunts (5526)
• United States
21 Nov 08
I believe it's a tie. The married person made a vow before God with his spouse and should know better. The single person is wrong, because they know that the person is married and they are party to adultery, which can affect a lot of people when discovered, especially the children of the married person. Cheating is wrong
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84070)
• Shingle Springs, California
21 Nov 08
Yep I agree with that!
@cyntrow (8524)
• United States
21 Nov 08
I wanted to say the married guy, but I can't. I have to say both are equally responsible. Here's why. My "sister" (who is not a blood relative but grew up in the same house with me) is recently divorced. Her husband of 24 years was screwing around and he fell in love with one of his women. They have 4 kids and she is trying to live on her own now. Problem is that she is dating married men. She knows the hurt that this can cause. She believes them when they say that the wife doesn't understand them. Both parties are equally to blame Sure there are some men who take mistresses and their wives also have someone,, or they are just turning a blind eye. But usually it is a man who is telling his wife that he is faithful and telling his girlfriend that he is seeking divorce. Or, the girlfriend KNOWS everything and doesn't care about the wife. I'll go for, both are equally to blame.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84070)
• Shingle Springs, California
21 Nov 08
I agree more with you (see above answer about predators).
@dieorfly (764)
• Slovak Republic
21 Nov 08
I would say from moral point of view the worse is the person who is in the relationship and cheat with other person. Why? Because this person has marriage commitment to his/her partner. If he/she is not happy in the certain relationship he/she should talk about it to partner and if they can solve the situation the should break up and not cheat. The single have commitment to nobody, of course if this would be moral person he/she would never start to date with married person, but I still think the worse is married person. Cheers
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84070)
• Shingle Springs, California
21 Nov 08
Thanks, you and the rest of the myLot population tend to agree. I'm leaning that direction too...
@myklj999 (30346)
• Olney, Illinois
21 Nov 08
The cheating spouse. They are already supposedly committed in the relationship.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84070)
• Shingle Springs, California
21 Nov 08
I wonder if anybody will say it's the other person. Waiting....
• United States
21 Nov 08
i guess this depends on whether the other person knows they are married or not. BUT either way they are both wrong. if i had to choose i would say the married person because they knwo taht they have someone at home and they know they are doing wrong. they should not be out there looking anyway
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84070)
• Shingle Springs, California
21 Nov 08
Maybe they aren't looking, maybe HOT single person came looking for them. But in that case they shouldn't be responding...