Santa Sleighed by a Slack Sack

It occurs to me that pikefish and crocodiles may have more in common than I thought. They both have big, mean jaws filled with teeth but some of them, at least, seem to have more than something in common with their way of thinking. No, there is a key to this problem. There is to every problem! Once you discover it, you are away. OK, Santa can't climb out without falling but his reindeer don't fall. Hmmm ... let's give this some elf-thought. A sleigh is not unlike a wagon, except it has no wheels. Santa's mission is something like Ocado's ... if people can't come to your market, then you take the goods to them. Uh-uhhh, bear up ... we are getting there. I have a song in my head ... the refrain goes: "Donna, donna, donna, donna, Donna, donna, done ..." That's it! Release Donna from the harness, she will turn into a swallow who will swallow the sack that is sack-religiously preventing the correct operation of a non-religious construct and we shall be on our way in no time. "Is that a Daguerre that I see before me?" "No, Hamlet (or 'Mon Petit Jambon', as ve say en France), it is merely a digitally-enhanced 3-D hologram"

Every reindeer looked towards Donna as if to ask "What will we do"?? As long as there is a female reindeer in the bunch, Christmas would not be shanghaied by such a simple mishap.. Since they were stopped in their tracks while flying across the sky, Donna knew what she had to do, being the only female and therefore the smartest one she had it all under control.. Sticking out of the sack closest to Santa and within Donna's reach was a Popeil Pocket fisherman, made famous by World renowned Ron Popeil, Donna grabbed this out of the sack and with the 6" of line included in the package, proceeded to cast the line a couple of times before she yanked in the "catch of the Day", the errant sack.. While doing so, she noticed the gift card, why, this was for Jeff Foxworthy, one of the world's biggest Rednecks, how proud she was to have used a "Pocket Fisherman" that was meant for one of her favorite comedians.. One she had seen so many times when Santa and Mrs Claus would let her watch the cable channels and when she was allowed to stay up until the wee hours watching infomercial's.. While the others were sleeping the night away, she had watched many, many of the infomercial's and it was just as easy as they said it was to use.. Pondering this, Donna took her place in line again and just as sure as the children, the good little boys and girls, would wake up to gifts left by Santa, Donna once again heard Santa proclaim, "On boys", while all the while thinking of many devious ways to get even, she thought of so many that she couldn't decide which one would be the best to use, but she will bide her time, as any good woman will do, then all at once, out of the blue, it will happen.. Santa may not make it next year, she thought, he may just have an accident!!!!! Hum!! Oh what could it be??

You really should write a child's book..You would do a awesome job and have the right amount of intrigue and enthusiasm and kids would love it.Great story I should have read this part first but my inbox is always giving me the newest first..

Sadly, I fear I am at least four hours too late. I doubt poor Santa and his entourage would still be suspended above Brissie - and strangely, my daughter is a flight attendant flying out of Brisbane early this morning, so I'm hoping her flight wasn't afflicted with reindeer strike. The odd bird gets caught in plane engines every now and then, and I'm guessing the horrid, racheting sound of crunching antlers would be enormously upsetting to all concerned. A blended Santa wouldn't look too marvie, either. I desperately hope some Brit responders who were on the ball whilst I was still sleeping have managed to sort this problem so Christmas isn't ruined this year. Viva la Brits!

That was a fantastic show of creativity. You're a good writer. You could do well at helium, or are you there already? Christmas should not be canceled: "so out from the north pole come the turbo rangers, sprouting in the sky like skydiving mushrooms. They have their repair gears clamp to their backs like parachutes. They hover worriedly over Santa's sleigh and ...."I can't think anymore P1, you're a better writer. Now, I'm stuck...lol...I invite you again to helium. Come share with us your talent. Happy holidays. I hope someone comes to rescue Santa..lol...

Haha,it is very interesting!But how can we help?Move the sack away?

Have you ever tried writing children's stories Pikey?? LOL! Are you one of those famous children's novelists? Well, I would let Santa take rest. He is a male chauvinist anyway....the way he seems to think the world is full of boys. As for the stockings...the Moms and Dads of the world will fill them them, sighing about how expensive things have become. Cheers and happy Mylotting

I'm with Owlwings, get Donna out of the harness and have her grab the sack. Great clip. My husband has East German relatives. Interesting stories...

I just love your bedtime stories..can we snuggle while you read me another..I just want to be warm and toasty before you come to Texas on Santa's Sleigh soon..

Hi p1key, Oh what a delima Santa's is having, what on earth are we to do? no presents for boys and girls on Christmas morning as Santa is stuck, well the only thing to do is get help form chitty chitty bang bang car for help, so how would the car help, any ideas? Hugs. Tamara