Would you consider this meddling with other's affairs?
By Masmasika
@Masmasika (1921)
Philippines
January 11, 2009 5:59pm CST
There are people who are very kind and very concerned with their neighbors to the extent that they appear nosy and some people think they are meddling in their affairs. This is good because they always remind us to lock our doors, be careful when we handle things that cause fire and be alert of robbers barging in the house.
I love my neighbor who always reminds me of many things to do but my friend hates her neighbor whom she calls nosy and meddler, who always sees things that she herself cannot see. And always tells her what to do with her children and her husband. Like what school to enroll her kids and what to do with his husband who often go out with his friends. She says, she's fed up and want to shout at her neighbor for meddling in her affairs.
If you were in her place would you consider what her neighbor is doing meddling with others' affairs? I told my friend that my neighbor is very kind because he always reminds me of things but she wouldn't listen to me. I'm glad that my neighbor does not mind what I do with my son. Well, I have no husband anyway. But really, I like my neighbor who reminds me what to do. It's good to have someone around who is concerned about you, right?
What can you say about my friend's neighbor? It's nice to hear from you???
3 responses
@celticeagle (159528)
• Boise, Idaho
12 Jan 09
I really don't think I would go as far as what you have written about. But, back about 50 years ago or maybe alittle more it was quite common for people to be quite friendly with their neighbors. Things have changed very much over the years and people no longer involve themselves like they used to.
@Masmasika (1921)
• Philippines
12 Jan 09
I understand what you mean celticeagle, but here in the Philippines, people are still too close to their neighbors. I think we are different and that we still have the old traditions we possessed a long time ago. There are lots of people who still mind their neighbors here in my country because we care a lot about others. Thanks celticeagle and happy mylotting.
@savak03 (6684)
• United States
13 Jan 09
There is concern and there is meddling. For you it seems that you are comfortable with the advice your neighbor gives you but your friend is not comfortable with her neighbor. Maybe you could advise her to try to talk with her neighbor and let the neighbor know that she doesn't appreciate the advice. There may not be a need for her to yell if she will just let her neighbor know that she is uncomfortable and would prefer to make her own mistakes.
@DeepGlow (242)
• Indonesia
12 Jan 09
Some like it hot, some like it cold. What we think is good is not always considered as good by others, vice versa. You might like the neighbor who likes to remind you of things, but others might not like it. And we can't generalize your experience and hers, because we don't know exactly how her neighbor said those things to her. A good thing can be accepted as a bad thing if we cannot convey the message in the right way.
And also, there is a thin line between caring about someone and meddling with one's affairs. I like people who care about me and remind me of things, but I don't like people messing with my personal life. And I think there is a huge difference between reminding neighbors to lock their doors and telling neighbors what to do with their husbands - whatever their husbands do. Reminding neighbors to lock their doors shows that we care about them, while telling neighbors what to do with their husbands is something personal. It's private matters. And it's like telling them that they are not good in taking care of their husbands.
I understand why your friend is upset with her neighbor. I know I would be if someone is telling me how I should take care my children and husband. It's like saying that I'm incompetence in managing my household. If your friend don't like her neighbor does that to her, I think it's better if she tells her neighbor that she doesn't like it - in a nice way, of course - so that the neighbor will stop.
