Ideas on divorce.

@Lore2009 (7387)
United States
February 25, 2009 4:35pm CST
What are your views on divorce? Do you think you are a failure if you have one? Do you think it's a 'sin'? Bad, good? Is it common?
2 people like this
11 responses
@zenki08 (700)
• Philippines
26 Feb 09
People to find that divorce is the easiest route out of a marriage that is not working out. This might be true and I am not against divorce. But sometimes people tend to be impulsive and just get married because they think that this is the right thing to do. Then after a few months they divorce. This is not what this is for. People must marry for the right reasons and not based on impulse to save some dignity on the sacredness of marriage.
@Lore2009 (7387)
• United States
27 Feb 09
True, the meaning of marriage is very vague now.
@KrauseHome (36344)
• United States
26 Feb 09
Personally my thoughts on Divorce is even in the Christian world it is not commonly accepted, but there are times when it should happen, and that in my Book should be acceptable for sure. If a woman is being abused then it is best to leave especially when her safety is at risk. Also in the case of infidelity if thru counseling, etc. it cannot be resolved, it is best to leave as well. But at the same time too many people continue to get married for the Wrong reasons. Just because you're in Love with the thought of Marriage people need to make sure they are ready and in Love with the person they are marrying and willing to do anything to keep it going as well. It is definately more than playing house, but if you get married and your vows are jeapordized most times for safety or sanity reasons it is time to get out as well.
@Lore2009 (7387)
• United States
27 Feb 09
Certainly, there needs to be a lot of brains in marriage not just the heart. And it does take two of each... both needs to be committed.
• Mexico
26 Feb 09
I think some divorces are unavoidable and even healthy for some of the parts, in case on Domestic Violence or other cases with no solution, but i don't think should be consider as an option untill you have explored all your posibilities.
@Lore2009 (7387)
• United States
27 Feb 09
That's true, everyone should fight for what they promised and that should be the last option after the fight to keep it working doesn't work.
• United States
26 Feb 09
actually i don't find it sinful at all, or to make someone look like a faliure. It all just depends on the situation. some people stay together because they feel as if they can't find another spouce or special someone so they stay together, others do it because they have children together, no matter how old their kids are. i think it's just something that happeneds in life. i just hope it's something that doesn't happen to me.
@Lore2009 (7387)
• United States
27 Feb 09
That's very true. And it does bite you in the butt when you're not even looking sometimes. Best wishes.
• United States
25 Feb 09
i think it is common, however i think it can be for the best in some relationships. i know my parents aren't like every other divorced couple out there. they remain great friends. they both attend family functions. it is not a sin and above all your not a failure if your marriage ends in divorce.
@Lore2009 (7387)
• United States
26 Feb 09
I don't think it's a failure either and can be for the better too.
@savypat (20245)
• United States
25 Feb 09
Divorce is very common here in the US. I think if you look at marriage as a contract and void it as a contract it's ok. But that is not what happens, emotions are involved and family destroyed by divorce, but it's better then living in a terrible relationship with no trust and no love.
@Lore2009 (7387)
• United States
25 Feb 09
That's true. It's a share of business and feelings. But some relief and new beginnings too.
@sandymay48 (2031)
• Canada
25 Feb 09
Hello..I think that divorces are way too common now. Because society has become much slacker in what is acceptable and being much easier now to get out of, I think many people do not try. Maybe some get married too easy in the first place without a sound knowledge of how it will change their lives. I include myself in that category having being married the first time at only 17 because I thought I wanted to. I do not think that all divorces are bad and in fact some are necessary for safetly issues. I just think some dont try but would rather move on to the next one. Marriage takes a lot of work and committment, give and take, trust and honesty. If there were more of this in the first place, maybe the instances of divorce would be less. I think it should be made harder to marry in the first place and maybe the rate would go down. HOwever I suppose if there were less divorces, then some people would make less money...(lawyers,)...I guess its a vicious circle. I am very happily married now and do not plan on ever divorcing again!
@Lore2009 (7387)
• United States
25 Feb 09
That's true that people are giving up easily now, and that if there were trust and honesty to begin with it would not have to happen. However, there are times it gives great lessons and better relationships afterward like yourself. Thanks for sharing.
@dlr297 (5418)
• United States
25 Feb 09
Divorce is something that happens, their are times when it is the best thing to do, and it can not be helped. I think people jump into it to fast, and do not fight to stay together.
@Lore2009 (7387)
• United States
25 Feb 09
Yes, I agree that it can be the best thing to do sometimes and some people really just give up too easily.
@lilaclady (28238)
• Australia
25 Feb 09
No I don't think it is a failure or a sin...we are all given one life and we all should make the most of it, marriage is a gamble as we all keep changing, and no-one can tell what lies ahead for any of us, if people don't change in the same direction and thing in life then make a couple unhappy then it is your duty to yourself to go on and find happiness...being happy is the most important thing in life...
@Lore2009 (7387)
• United States
25 Feb 09
That's very true. I agree that we all deserve happiness too and that is why what we were born for. We all make mistakes and we can do something about those mistakes to make things better. Thanks for responding.
@coferbox (298)
• United States
26 Feb 09
I used to think divorce met failure, it is because of the way I was raised in a religious home and divorce was just unheard of. If people in my small town got divorced everybody whispered about it behind their back. Then I grew up and got married and found myself in a verbally and emotionally abusive relationship. That showed me the other side of the story. While some people may bail out to soon without trying to fix problems, there are some things that simply can't be fixed. Especially if someone refuses to admit they have a problem or try to work on the marriage. I stayed in that marriage longer than I should have. And I have to admit that what people would think did have a bearing on my reluctance to get a divorce. But it got to the point where it was just unbearable to go home after work most days because I just couldn't face the taunting and insults anymore. I finally decided that what people thought wasn't nearly as important as my sanity and happiness. Now it really makes me angry when I hear people talking down about someone for getting a divorce. You don't know what went on in that marriage. Only the two people involved in a marriage know the entire story. And why should people pay for a mistake for the rest of their life? If you make a mistake in any other area of your life people will applaud you for fixing it. But try to get out of a marriage that was a mistake and people will look down on you for it. People need to learn to mind their own business and not be so judgmental. Perhaps instead of calling them a failure you can befriend them and try to help them though a difficult time.
• United States
26 Feb 09
Lore- I don't view it as a sin. I think that sometimes it is a good option if two people truly cannot work through their differences, and have tried everything else. It's not healthy to stay with someone that you just are not working out with. Anora