Are you a good shoulder for your friends?

@zandi458 (27948)
Malaysia
March 3, 2009 11:06pm CST
Many of us fail to realize that life for most people has its unbearable moments. We must face a constant parade of self misgivings, temporary lapses of confidence, and momentary glimpses of failures and defeats. Each of us wants to be helped over life's rough spots. And it is often said that God gave burdens, also shoulders. Is there someone whose shoulder you can lean on, even cry on? Are you a good shoulder for your friends? There is a popular saying "The greatest healing therapy is friendship and love." I hope this prove to be true for all of us who are beset with today's life maddening problems.
9 people like this
43 responses
@riyasam (16570)
• India
4 Mar 09
i do agree with that but usually i find that i am not able to unburden myself completely whrn i am with human friends.thats one of the reasons why i find so much of solace in the chruch and my mother also gives me comfort to some extent.
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (56760)
• Delhi, India
4 Mar 09
Welcome back!
2 people like this
@riyasam (16570)
• India
4 Mar 09
i am so glad to be back.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (27948)
• Malaysia
5 Mar 09
Welcome back riya. I hope you are recovering. I am happy that you find solace in the church and hope the good Lord will protect you from all dangers
1 person likes this
@savypat (20245)
• United States
5 Mar 09
I must admit that as I grow older I am not as good a shoulder as I use to be. I find that my tolerance for the human condition is much shorter. I particularly have a problem with people who make the same mistake over and over again. I have changed hair dressers just because I couldn't hear one more man problem that she got into. I swear it was the same man over and over, he was just in a different body. I need positive people in my life at this time.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (27948)
• Malaysia
6 Mar 09
Age may have changed your perspective views on others but don't derail yourself from the realities of life especially that touches human souls. Being seasoned and experienced in life matters your advice is a great motivation to others. Whatever you say, whatever you do for the benefit of humankind will be a blessing to you and all good deeds will boomerang to your benefits in bounty.
@savypat (20245)
• United States
6 Mar 09
Thank you, I need a kick in the head every once in a while.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (27948)
• Malaysia
6 Mar 09
I hope I have shaken you strong enough!
@pinklilly (3445)
• Australia
6 Mar 09
I have one really good friend that knows all and I can go to for anything and evreything and a few others that I know I could go to... I would like to think I am a good person to come to and lean on... Alot of my friends have come to me for that reason... I always help others where I can... I have had more lean on me than I have ever leant on others.... It is wonderful that people have somebody or something to help them through tough times... Life is not meant to be easy, there are many obsticles to hurdle across omoungst the good.... What doesn't kill us only makes us stronger....
• China
7 Mar 09
Just like what's your said,life is not easy for any of us,the only thing we should do is trying our best to overcome obstacles in our daily life.But none of us is powerful enough to win all the troubles.Although someone says that u should never trouble trouble unless trouble troubles u,we can not control our life.So when I meet trouble which I can not overcome,I really need someone to give a hand.That don't mean offer me money,but a loyalty shoulder and share my feeling.Each of us needs a friend,if u wanna do something with me,just send me a singal and I will be there.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (27948)
• Malaysia
12 Mar 09
You are a beautiful person. You have the welfare of your friends. I agree with your saying that 'what doesn't kill us only makes us stronger' Nice words.
• India
5 Mar 09
Hello my friend zandi458 Ji, I am always delighted, if someone wants my support. In fact, i come out frankly, if any one needs my help. The more you give to others (in fact, help Almighty to help Him in His duties), we can always expects from Him with their multipication dividend. So let's find some ways to help others happily. may god bless you and have a great time.
@zandi458 (27948)
• Malaysia
6 Mar 09
All good acts done unto others is a great blessing on yourself. And you have all that in you, a passionate heart, ever willing to help others in need. You are really marvellous!
1 person likes this
• India
6 Mar 09
Hello my friend zandi458 Ji, So nice of you for your heartly expressions. may god bless you and have a great time.
@Lakota12 (42681)
• United States
4 Mar 09
No not any more I have no shoulder to cry on. and I do hope that I have good strong shoulders for any one to cry on if need be.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (27948)
• Malaysia
6 Mar 09
How sad you have lost the shoulder to cry on but giving your shoulder for others to cry on is a great blessing for you.
@Lakota12 (42681)
• United States
6 Mar 09
thanks
• India
4 Mar 09
YES iam always ready to help my freinds in anyways.And that saying is absolutely correct no one can take place of a freind.as it said that all other relations are made by destiny but only freindship is the one which we choose.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (27948)
• Malaysia
5 Mar 09
You really have that soft spot in you.
• India
5 Mar 09
thanks ,but how can you say that
1 person likes this
@ANTIQUELADY (36468)
• United States
4 Mar 09
everybody nheeds a friend that has a good shoulder. i do have those kind of friends. i have big shoulders for them to. i'm a very good listener.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (27948)
• Malaysia
5 Mar 09
A good listener is a good counsellor. And definitely you have that both.
1 person likes this
@ANTIQUELADY (36468)
• United States
5 Mar 09
thank you. try to be.
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (56760)
• Delhi, India
4 Mar 09
Hi! Zandi! Yes, I can say it with conviction that I could be a good shoulder for my dear friends, whenever they need me. I believe in the philosophy that a 'Friend in need is a friend indeed'. Whenever any of my friends approaches me for my assistance, help, advice or he/she simply wants to share his/her grievance, I remain there for him/her. I know that friends approach me because they trust me and they have faith in me that I'll definitely provide them with some relief. I try to do my best to lessen their problems and difficulties with the my available resources. Like-wise, when I am in trouble or need their help, I approach them, without any kind of hesitation. I think it is mutual and it takes two to tango.
@zandi458 (27948)
• Malaysia
5 Mar 09
I know dpk, you have what it takes to be a trusted friend in all seasons. I have no doubt about that. Your smiles bring the world to a standstill, it is so infectious that others just come to you without second thought. You are their source of inspiration and hope. You have the heart for people in need.
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (56760)
• Delhi, India
5 Mar 09
I feel flattered and humbled after reading your observations about me. Many thanks for the same. I did not know that my smile is infectious and it can bring others to standstill.
1 person likes this
@reckon21 (3484)
• Philippines
6 Mar 09
I think I am in my own point of view. I listen to my friends problems and help them the way I can. In friendship you have to value your friends trust and loyalty.
@zandi458 (27948)
• Malaysia
12 Mar 09
Yes, I agree with you wholly. You are a friend to all friends when you value their friendships.
• China
6 Mar 09
Hi there,I really agree with "the greatest healing therapy is friendship and love".I am a guy who is 24 years old.I have a lot of friends during different periods in my life,but only a few of them are still keep in touch with each other now,it's a pity which I think is a regret matter.I suppose my shoulder could be useful when my friend get into trouble.Actually,not all of my friends would like to talk with me since only two or three of them are my close friends,but if u are my close friend I would like to do my best to share your feeling and give a hand to u,if u are a common friend of mine,my should is loyalty for u either.Best wishes for all my friends^^
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (27948)
• Malaysia
6 Mar 09
Welcome James to mylot. I hope you enjoy mylotting as much as I do. I have approved your friends request and hope you will be active in responding to my discussions and posting your own discussions. I am sure you make good friend as you are willing to listen and share your friends problems.
@ahgong (10064)
• Singapore
6 Mar 09
Oh yeah... I found a very good shoulder to lean on and cry on at times. And I treasure the person who owns that pair of shoulders so much, I married her! And likewise, she found my shoulders to be very good to lean on and well, cry on too. Yeah, we all need that shoulder of support every once in a while. Especially during those really trying times when we do not know who to look for or what to do with the problem at hand.
@zandi458 (27948)
• Malaysia
6 Mar 09
You have found the right shoulders in your wife. She is part of you and have the microscopic details of your heart. She is your most trusted partner in life.
1 person likes this
@subha12 (18452)
• India
6 Mar 09
I am a good friend. Many people , who are my friends have needed their help in time of need. But I am also cheated in one place. One friend, whom i supported so much, cheated me when he had his things done.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (27948)
• Malaysia
6 Mar 09
There are sure black sheep among our friends. Just be alert .
@sid556 (30989)
• United States
6 Mar 09
I think I am or at least I hope I am. My friends do feel comfortable coming to me in times of trouble just to talk. Actually, I tend to get that with even complete strangers. As for me in times of need....oh yes, I do have a great circle of friends. It is very rare that I use their shoulders but I have to say that when I have....they have been the best.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (27948)
• Malaysia
6 Mar 09
Only when we are comfortable sharing our problems with friends that they are of help. Problems shared are problems halved. But if you can handle it yourself, you are in your best position to make your own choice.
5 Mar 09
zandi458,you are very right .everyone has his presure and hardtime in life .When I was in such situation ,I found I can not find a person to share my unbearable time .Not becasue of my unbelieving my friends ,but I am reletant to open my heart to tell my best friend .I don't want to bring anything troublesome to them .But I am willing to listen to my best friends' uncontency in life .I don't know why ? I know friendship is very important to us .May our friendship forever ,mylottings!
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (27948)
• Malaysia
6 Mar 09
You know it well. True friends are always there for us regardless of rain or shine.
• Philippines
5 Mar 09
to have a true friend is a really great blessing from above. those characteristics you have shared about being a good shoulder to lean on is quite natural in all of us, we just don't know how to use those natural instincts that is why we have never or often been seen as good friends.. in my case i just can't help it. i have few friends, i consider them as my treasures and maybe that's the reason that i may be a good shoulder for my friends..
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (27948)
• Malaysia
6 Mar 09
It is indeed a blessing to have true friends when we are out and down.
• Indonesia
5 Mar 09
i have some good friends for me to lean on, specially when i was done. insyaAllah, i'm a good shoulder for my friends, at least i'll try to do my best to help them whenever they need me. and the quote there "The greatest healing therapy are friendship n love" yes, i agree ! based on my experiences, when i was confused n lost about something in my life, and i share it to ask an advises from my friends, it did help alots..really helped alots trust me. they could bring back my smile again and ease my mind many times, with lots of jokes again afterwards..
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (27948)
• Malaysia
6 Mar 09
That is facts of life. Without the essence of friendship and love we will not be able to lead a normal happy life. Your experiences is a living proof that it helps to have dear friends around.
@lynnemg (4536)
• United States
5 Mar 09
I do have people to talk to when I really need to, and it does help because I am able to get a different perspective on things when I am unable to do it for myself. Although I have people to talk to, I don't tal;k unless I really feel I have to. On the other hand, I am a great shoulder for my friends and family. I don't know how many times my best friend has called me late a tnigh just to vent or ask for my advice. I don't care if it is 3 in the morning, I am there for my friends and family.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (27948)
• Malaysia
6 Mar 09
You are really a beautiful person in and out. You are always there for your friends.
@zabawaus (1732)
• United States
4 Mar 09
hello zandi 458, Well my friends like to call me and share all their problems , and i actually do my best to listen to them and advise if i can. But mostly i don't like to bore people with my problems i only speak one of my friends if i am a little drunk, and she is a great friends and helps me almost all of my problems. Have a great day!
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (27948)
• Malaysia
6 Mar 09
When you are drunk only have of what you are saying is true.
@buggles64 (2713)
• United States
4 Mar 09
I have a shoulder for my friends if they ever need me. If they have a problem, I would be there for them. I don't have a shoulder right now though that I could trust. I love your saying "the greatest healing therapy is friendship and love" because it is soooo true. Everyone wants to feel needed, loved and respected. And sometimes all we ever really need is a hug.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (27948)
• Malaysia
6 Mar 09
Even a small hug will bring in happiness to a trouble heart.
@Opal26 (17686)
• United States
4 Mar 09
Hey zandi! I do have friends that I can talk to when I need them and the know that if they need me I am here for them too! A good friendship is one that works both ways! I try not to burden my friends with my problems to often. I prefer to listen if possible. I don't share my feelings with just anyone. But, it still is good to know that if I do need to share my feelings that there is someone who is there for me who will listen and not judge and help me through the tough times!
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (27948)
• Malaysia
6 Mar 09
Most of us are not too comfortable in making known our personal problems to friends but there are selected few who are trusted and can be relied on to share our woes.