How many of your discussions remain unresolved?

@zandi458 (28102)
Malaysia
April 15, 2009 8:20am CST
I have been posting discussions after discussions and receiving loads of responses from friends and other mylotters but I am really guilty for not giving out the best responses to my discussions. When BR has not been awarded the discussions remain unresolved and stagnant even after months have passed. Most of the responses that I got were well thought out views from fellow mylotters and I find it difficult to pick the best of the best. Maybe if the responses were only a handful it is no big task but what happen if you get a ton of them, how would you decide which one deserves the BR? It can be head scratching to choose. I may know how to create discussions but when it comes to judging I chicken out. i only realize that my discussions have stagnate in my unresolved column when I saw the long list of numbers displayed of past discussions unresolved which shows that this part has been neglected far too long. I am sorry for keeping you waiting, maybe some responders are no longer around, unfortunately. Can you give me a clue how you come up with your BR? This is something I need to act fast to clear them before it get piled up. It is only fair that BR be given out and in accordance to mylot wishes.
4 people like this
21 responses
@bombshell (11256)
• Germany
29 Apr 09
so far all my discussions are solved but not all i replied how are you?MISS YAH!
2 people like this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
2 May 09
Fine but missing your witty discussions. How long more are you hibernating? I can tell you that you are missed. So come out of the shell and join the fun. I see that you are very prompt in giving out of the BR. That is
1 person likes this
@Lakota12 (42600)
• United States
15 Apr 09
oh my I am in the same boat as you I dont get to the unresolved ones at all . oops guess I better take time to do it groan. ANd like you I have some very good ones hard to choose when it first started I gave every one BR but that wasnt what I was to do . lol
1 person likes this
@Lakota12 (42600)
• United States
15 Apr 09
I did a very few. hard to make a choise on alot of tehm and then I have 0 redponces on alot of mine!
1 person likes this
@Lakota12 (42600)
• United States
15 Apr 09
Like one I started last night and spelt join wrong lol all about the tea party from Chuck . oh well some one will answer it sometime today I hope grin!
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
15 Apr 09
so now at least I know I am not the only one far behind schedule. We need to update our unresolved discussions.
@kalav56 (11464)
• India
15 Apr 09
HI Zandi !I am also like you and take a long time to choose the BR.Suddenly I would be swamped by guilt and then I would resolve a few discussions of mine As you said ,people write well thought out responses and it is our duty to make the right choice.I read them all patiently and if the post has something new, something funny or witty ,something that is extraordinarily thoughtful or something that contains a new piece of information, I give the BR.Sometimes I just go by how it appealed to me.
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
15 Apr 09
This is great, at least I am getting some good tips from you. By the way the email you gave me does not seem to load in the site. Is it ....@yahoo.co.in. (is the dots in right places)?
@kalav56 (11464)
• India
15 Apr 09
I checked my message once again Zandi.What is written there is THE mail id.I do not know why it is not getting loaded .Write your mail ID in a PM, and I shall mail you from mine, if the problem recurs and you are unable to send it.
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (58673)
• Delhi, India
16 Apr 09
Hi! Zandi! I keep resolving my pending/unresolved discussion in between. It is very essential to resolve a discussion, otherwise its list keep on getting longer and longer. I try to choose the response, which appeals me and which touches the core issue in my post. I feel if the respondent has contributed substantially to the topic and he/she has expressed her/his candid and honest views, he/she deserves the best response. I also take considerable time (may be more than 3 months) to resolve my pending discussions. What you can do is please make a resolution that you will 'resolve' at least 2-3 discussions each day, this way you will be able to reduce number of your pending discussions. All the best to you.
@dpk262006 (58673)
• Delhi, India
17 Apr 09
Many thanks for accepting my advice.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
17 Apr 09
I think you are very consistent in giving out your BR. I heed your advice my friend. Thanks for a very thoughtful views.
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
15 Apr 09
i tend to have alot of the friends respond to my discussions & they always give good answers so with them i just take turns giving each one of them a br. first. i don't start that many discussions so i want to cover my friends . of course i do base it on content but choose the closest friends first.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
17 Apr 09
lol....that makes friends keep coming back for more of your posts. Good idea.
1 person likes this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
17 Apr 09
i try to be a loyal person to my friends here on mylot & in the real world to.
1 person likes this
@modstar (9605)
• Philippines
17 Apr 09
Best Response - Just be patient. i will be giving out best responses these coming days. So try your very best to respond! good luck!
Like you, i have the difficulty awarding the best response to most of my discussions and for the same reasons too! Sometimes the responses are overwhelming that the number and quality of responses is making it a lot harder for us to decide which is which. Yesterday, i awarded few best responses to myLotters but only to the discussions with few responses. It's better than nothing right? I guss you should start slow by doing the same. The start next with double digit number of posts and so on.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
17 Apr 09
I did resolve few discussions yesterday that was 6 months old and was pleasantly surprise to get feed back from the recipients that they forgot they have responded to my posts.LOL. And they came to my latest post too. sometimes it is good to shock our responders by giving late BR.
@modstar (9605)
• Philippines
17 Apr 09
It resurrects the discussion too, even after marking the best response, how ironic.
1 person likes this
@lingli_78 (12822)
• Australia
15 Apr 09
i can't actually count how many of my discussions still remain unresolved... i think i am guilty of the same thing like you as well... i can create discussion but it takes me ages to decide when it comes to giving BR... what i did is i just try to pick the responses that give me the best input or advice for my discussions as BR... take care and have a nice day...
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
17 Apr 09
Finally, we meet at our weakest point. That is where I fail. But the advice I get from a responder here to at least give 3 BR a day, should solve the problems of my unresolved discussions.
@riyasam (16556)
• India
16 Apr 09
hi,zandi,i also face this dilemma quite often.i also do have quite a number of discussions which are unresolved,my unresolved discussions have gone beyond three months but not more than that.whenever i am faced with the dilemma of handing out the bestresponses,i go for the saying FIRST COME,FIRST SERVE.hope this helps.
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
17 Apr 09
I am pacified to know that I am not the only person who stubbornly delay in giving out my BR.
• Canada
23 Sep 09
Not sure, because I never stopped to count. Sometimes a wonderful answer jumps out at me and I give it a best response as soon as Ifind it, other times, i have to go back throuh my old discussions, read them, and decide on a best response right there and then. Thanks for the reminder. I need to go back and resplve some discussions.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
24 Sep 09
Sometimes we need to remind each other that our discussions need to be resolved.
@Sreekala (34314)
• India
17 Apr 09
Hi zandi, Really it is a difficult job to give BR especially if you got lots of responses. I don’t have much for pending when I get time I keep resolving. If you ask the way, when I read the responses and commenting back I got impressed with some responses and keep the same thing in mind then again I go through the whole responses and selecting the best three then it is quite easy to decide who deserves the BR. It is a time consuming job when the number of responses is high.
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
17 Apr 09
Hi Sreekala, downsizing to three and then select the BR from there is a good idea. I learn something from you today. Thanks for the info.
@Opal26 (17679)
• United States
15 Apr 09
Hi zandi! I tend to pick the best responses after no more than a few weeks so that I don't forget to resolve them. And yes, it can be very difficult at times because there are always so many great responses to pick from. I can't tell you an easy way to pick one. You just have to go with your gut! Even though sometimes there are many, you just have to decide which one really "speaks" to you. You have to make some kind of decision sooner or later and I find if you wait too long the decision only gets more difficult!
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
17 Apr 09
I totally agree with you Opal. The longer I drag my unresolved discussions the more it become difficult.
• United States
16 Apr 09
I would say about maybe 25-30% of my past discussions have received completely zero response. I can say about at least twenty of those discussions I feel bad about because I thought they were really good and would generate a lot of response but apparently they didn't, I don't know if it was my lack of wording for the title subjects or what.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
17 Apr 09
Hi handsomeeitaliano (what a name), I checked your discussions and found your discussions are interesting. Maybe the friends you have are not those active ones. So they don't come to your discussions to response. Honestly, I have not seen you around not until you come to my posts. Thanks for responding.
• Australia
16 Apr 09
I only ever have the last half dozen unresolved, as I go through the list regularly. Mind you, my most recent one might be a bit difficult, the only response was incomprehensible, and I'm damned if I'll give it a BR. Somebody, please, help! (You probably need to at least know the moves in chess.) Lash
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
17 Apr 09
Hi Lash, You're right your last post is something quite difficult which might not interest many people here. I do go through my past discussions but can never make up my mind to resolve them. But this delaying tactics is not without benefits as it draw latecomers to view and response.
• United States
17 Apr 09
I have a few that have gone without any responses and I don't understand it. They seem to be interesting topics. I'm still new to myLot and have so much going on in life that I have not responded to each of the replies made on my discussions. What happens there is never a response to any of my started discussions? I must admit Zandi you do have a high myLot number. I am jealous and impressed at the same time. Do you do any other writing? You must be on the computer a lot...right?
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
17 Apr 09
Hi Ocean, I need to check your profile and see why your discussions did not get good response. I am not surprise as you are still new here and you need to make your presence felt by responding to as many discussions as possible. This way others will notice you and and maybe request for your friendship. I can say each time I post new discussions I will get a handful of people requesting to be my friends. I approve them all except for dubious characters that doesn't do justice to my discussions, like stalking and trolling and giving negative remarks. The numbers you see besides my name only explain that I have been here for a long period of time ie 3 years. Yes, I do spend most of my time on the computer as I have much free time at my disposal. Well, you'll reach that figure yourself in no time if you're active participating here. Of late I've join a new and upcoming social site which is more like mylot but find it quite thrilling there. If you are interested just pm me.
@freak369 (5113)
• United States
15 Apr 09
I didn't realize I had so many discussions that were still unresolved. When I saw that I had nine pages I almost fell over. I spend a good half hour going through them and now the only ones that are still left are ones that have no replies to them. Most of them were easy to pick the best responses. A couple were tough because I got some really great replies and answers. From now on I'm going to stay on top of picking out best responses, nothing is going to go for more than a month without it getting a close out.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
15 Apr 09
You almost tally my pages of unresolved discussions! That is sure time consuming to pick the BRs.
@littleowl (7157)
15 Apr 09
Hi zandi, the way I personally give a BR is to the one that has really who has given good advice or something like that but it is really who you think has given the best answer to your discussion...littleowl
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
17 Apr 09
Hi littleowl, I have many that are really striking in their views, and that finds me in a difficult situation to choose.
@savypat (20216)
• United States
15 Apr 09
I try to keep up with this, I do a few each day and if I am undecided I give the BR to the one with the lowest number to encourage the new folks.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
17 Apr 09
You seems to have a different style of awarding your BR. Maybe it is a way of encouraging others to be more active here.
@savak03 (6684)
• United States
15 Apr 09
There are many different ways I choose a best response and mostly it depends on the type of discussion. I will give a BR when I've asked for help or information and some one comes to my aid with the answer I'm needing. One time I gave a BR for a response that was well thought out and detailed even though the discussion went a different direction from what I intended. Sometimes I just give a BR because the response brought back memories or just made me laugh. In short I don't think there is a formula to choosing the BR, you just have to trust your feelings. Oh, just one more. If I have had a discussion that didn't get any responses for a long time I will award the BR to the first person who took pity on it and brought it out of the no response file.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
15 Apr 09
Too many good responses confuse me but your tips are good ones. Thanks for sharing.
@jshekhar (1562)
• India
15 Apr 09
Hello Zandi, I am very lazy when it comes to starting discussions and one of the reasons I do not start a lot of them is that I am a bad judge when it comes to resolving them and selecting a best response. I always feel I have done injustice to someone by not picking up his response as the B.R. but then there can only be once winner, isn't it? At the max I have got around 50 responses for a single discussion and I do take out time to read all of them before selecting a b.r. That is why the job gets tougher.
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
15 Apr 09
Definitely more responses mean heavier duty awaits us. That is the reasons why I have been procrastinating on this BRs award.
@flowerday (322)
• Singapore
15 Apr 09
i am new to myLot so i also do not really know how to choose the best response..because i feel that it is very hard to choose a best one as most of the responses are all equally good..but i guess to be fair to everyone, we just got to choose a best one..
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
17 Apr 09
Welcome to mylot. I hope you find your stay here enjoyable. Even as a senior person here I still find difficulties in awarding the BR.