If you are a stepmom did you come in the picture trying to be a mom?

I cannot speak for myself, since I don't have any step parents. But I can say this, my kids love my girlfriend. And I set the ground rules from the get go. I told her and them that she will never be the mother of my kids. She would be there in case of anything. Nothing more. She loves my kids and my kids love her. Now, on the other side of the coin, my evil ex, which she lied about being married to this bum she's with. My kids hate him and he don't like my kids. There are issues there. My kids will never respect him. Now, my evil ex at the beginning demanded that my kids call him dad, which they refused and then they were told to respect him. Which actually backfired. Now she has thrown this guy out of her house at least 20 times in the last 4 years. And she keeps taking him back. What a moron. My son is fed up with her completely and my daughter is just about there herself. That's why something might give and the kids will wind up with me. I don't mind. But as I said, she will have to have the papers changed and cough up the money.

An interesting post especially from my perspective since we don't get to see many step relationships out here. Somethings that I would hesitate to ask too..but glad that you revealed your feelings. I came across a post though in which the lady mentioned that her step mother more than filled up the void left by mother, and that she was a great lady. Not every lady can be that good I know, and I am glad your step mom was not the proverbial bad step mother.

I became a stepmom at a young as to a young child. At the time I was 19 had a 1 year old of my own and my husband. My stepson was only 2 years old when we finally got to be apart of his life. I didnt know what I wanted to do at that point. I was just so confused and mixed up. I have never tried nor have I ever wanted to try to take the place of his biological mother. Although not by choice I have become basicly the only mom he really knows. My husband got full residential custody in the beginning of 2007. Ever since then my stepsons mom takes advantage of it. She is supposed to visit him every weedend and my stepson is lucky he see's her for 2 of his visits. To top that off she takes him Friday after school and then by Saturday she is calling saying she can't handle him. He made the choice at 2 years old to call me mommy. To this day at nearly 6 he still calls me mommy. People on his moms side of the family say I am forcing him to do it and he doesnt want to call me mommy but in reality it's all his doing. I dont mind. I have done alot for him in the last 2 years and I'm loving every minute of it. I am still not trying to take his mothers place but I feel I have because of her own actions.