When I turn around I suddenly realise that I am in my 50s!

@zandi458 (28102)
Malaysia
August 1, 2009 6:39am CST
As if it was only yesterday that I was having happy hours with my buddies at the down town clubs when suddenly I realized that I have gone through the thick and thin of life through the many colorful patches of my life. What makes it worse is being reminded often through the hilarious jokes that I get from my emails hinting on me that I have indeed reached the pinnacle of life. An age many assumed as a breaking point. Lots of things are going on in our forties and fifties and sixties. Guess what? Physical changes and aging are also happening to your partner. Problems related to maintaining erectile endurance are as normal for him as menopausal symptoms such as hot flushes are normal for us. Save those who are with younger partners. And you might both be dealing with lower libidos and lots of stress. This is the reality in life and discussing it in public is nothing to be shy of as we are grown up oldies! Does this mean it's time to throw away your lingerie? Or letting the bedroom door open because nothing is going on? It is time that we to take stock of life as time and tide waits for no man. Be open to your loved one and enjoy the balance of years that is left in togetherness. What say you?
2 people like this
16 responses
@shibham (16977)
• India
2 Aug 09
hi zandi. i undestand your felings but i have a long distance to reach 50. don't think that i am derailed from your discussion but i wanna to say that u have passed your past with lots of happy moments. but now a days as terrorism is growing up, as the price rate of our domestic materials are raising and so many conflictions, silent wars and all those nonbenevolent factors are increasing, then it is too hard to survive a better living. so u are fulfilled by your past anh hope u think so. anyway 50 is nothing, u have a long path of your life to cross. be confident for it. all plants, animals, and men are alredy in eternity, travelling across the face of time. whence we know not. whither, who is able to say? let us have one world at a time, and let us make the journey one of joy to our fellow passengers, and just as convenient and happy for them as we can, and trust the rest as we trust life. take care.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
2 Aug 09
Yes, shibham, you are communicating with people of all ages here and learning a little of life from them. Make the most of your time now as it will bear you the fruits of your labour when you are at my age.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
2 Aug 09
Are we any different in terms of languages? No, we are all learning and writing in a foreign language, a language that empowers us all to come to a common ground to learn and understand each others culture. I am very fortunate to be able to have fair command of this language which enable me to communicate in the net otherwise not knowing this international language will only push me further back to the world of darkness, maybe to the caveman era. I am sure the native speakers are delighted to have us here to be on par with their intelligence as they are eager to learn from people from the other end of the globe.
@shibham (16977)
• India
2 Aug 09
hi zandi, i have learnt a lot from all of u, specialy gems like u. i have joined here only for this reason so that i can learn something and improve my poor english. yes, but there is no limit of knowledge. do u think that u are well known from every aspects of life? perhaps no one can say. so our life span is not enough to learn all everything, but we can try. isn't it? happy friendship day.lol
@derek_a (10874)
2 Aug 09
When I got to be 50, I remember thinking "wow, that's old". I hadn't thought it at all when I was 49. Then a decade later I was celebrating my 60th in a restaurant with my family and friends. And then I was thinking how nice it would be to have been celebrating my 50th! I like to think it is just a number, but it's not so easy sometimes. Nobody told me about all the aches and pains or the mind and body both wanting to pull in different direction! Now I'm trying a different mode of thought.. It's all natural, so why bother about it! Derek
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
4 Aug 09
I hope my fingers are still steady and not shaky to type on the keyboards and my eyesight are still sharp. I might need a pair of thick glasses to read..lol .
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
4 Aug 09
I am sure you have achieved tremendous success in life now that you are in your 60 and still strong and going. Reaching 50 is a great achievement for me especially when it comes with no health complains. I am now gearing towards the next century with much enthusiasm.
1 person likes this
@derek_a (10874)
4 Aug 09
Yep!! Make sure you send me a message here in a 100 years! - Derek
1 person likes this
@I_LUV_U (2519)
• India
2 Aug 09
That's why don't look into your past! It's not just about aging, there are so many other things that needlessly get revived only to disturb you. Same goes for the future - you start pondering all the possibilities where things could go awfully wrong and of situations that could make life more worse, and anxiety takes your life over. Past is past, and future will be future, it is only the present that we can relish and influence. Let's just look in on the things at hand and see what we can do about them. That's what I'm doing myself too. I have a hell of a lot of concerns about the future, yet I cannot care less about them for now. Keeping myself fulfilled moment by moment is working out fine for me.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
2 Aug 09
At such a young age you have the wisdom of someone much older. I agree with your views. The past is wisdom, the future is joy and the present is action. The present is a gift that is why it is call present.
• China
27 Oct 09
no no no,just take it easy,think about what human beings were originally,it was just the air.so when we die,we would be the air again,just being the way we were at the beginning.Definitely life is short,but we can make it meaningful and wonderful by ourselves.so just do whatever you want to do,under that situation,life would not be hurt by the time.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
27 Oct 09
Sweet words, very inspiring indeed. I do take one day at a time and am enjoying what the present moment dictate to me. We should live life to the fullest before it expires.
@krajibg (11923)
• Guwahati, India
5 Aug 09
Amazing life zandi. One does accept this or not does not mater, what comes to the count is you are fast distancing your down memory lane. I still remember that day when I had appeared for my matriculation and now it is over 20 years. When and how they slipped off my hand? But what soever way I might get taken aback by this fact , this is true, just true as I am typing a response to one Malaysian friend. Life goes on and there is the final halt and neither you nor anybody is beside me. And about our physical condition is also going all nonsupporting to our desires. Is it frustrating or Time sooth the wound I am not sure. A time would come when you really feel like throwing the lingerie and enjoy the bliss of life lol.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
6 Aug 09
Despite going through a frustrating period in life, senior couples in dilemma should find ways to connect the bodies, hearts and souls and let intimacy happen when it happen. Life is short so it is only prudent that we bring ourselves out in open in a way that's comfortable so it's not something one has to harbor alone in the dark.
@grace118224 (1038)
• China
2 Aug 09
Yeah it's unavoidable to get old for everybody no matter what kind of people you are . It's equal to everybody in this point . Time will go very fast and without our notice the young days are gone with the wind . Horrible indeed . It seems a long time for me to get old but i know that day will come soon . Therefore why don't we enjoy our lives as much as possible ?
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
2 Aug 09
Huh...are you dreaming of getting old? Not me, how I wish I can put back the clock and reverse the time. There is no better time than now to appreciate and bring about the change we want.
@KrauseHome (36448)
• United States
2 Aug 09
These are some excellent points shared here, and ones I think we can all learn from and live by. Because Yes, as time goes by we do get a little older and our needs change, but that does not mean we need to start acting old and not having any Fun and enjoying life anymore either. I think it just means to explore more and be willing to still do things you enjoy as you can as well. They always say that 50 is the New 40, and don't life really begin at 50 anyways?
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
2 Aug 09
wow..it is nice to think that 50 is the new 40. Really it doesn't make much difference with the passing of each calender year, it is only the way how we transform our life with positive images.
@Lakota12 (42600)
• United States
1 Aug 09
No dont throw away lingerie! No telling what can happen behind closed doors at 60 or beyound!. That is if your partner is still alive after that forget it lol
@Lakota12 (42600)
• United States
4 Aug 09
yup they can stay liber that way lol
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
4 Aug 09
I don't think all the oldies have this aching bones complain. They are those in the 80s still riding horses!
@littleowl (7157)
2 Aug 09
Hi Zandi, I am 53 and don't mind saying it, as am young at heart and don't look it (am not bragging just so many people say so), my libido is fine am not married am divorced but there is a man in my life and though we live apart it is what we want. I maybe a little more staid in my ways but have never seen over 50 as an 'oldie' and to me age is just a number! many a time my body tells me different but I tend to ignore it...to me life is a blessing through the good and bad times, and for the time that I have left I intend to catch up on the things I never did when I was younger! lol..LoLo
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
2 Aug 09
Phew...wit a whistle for you lolo for having a youthful look. I have grown out of my statistics, a little on the large size but am happy the way I am as long as I am in the pink of health, I have to forget about the measurements. Relationships can become more effective or at least we learn to get along with others. Be happy the way you make your relationships work out at its best.
@syankee525 (6261)
• United States
1 Aug 09
i just look like at it, it's a new chapter of your life, and being 50 don't have to be too bad. here i am 43 and having doctrors telling me i have a body of a 80 yr old man bites. but i keep a smile all the time. so enjoy it, as we get older we wiser suppose too,
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
2 Aug 09
Time to revamp your image. Being 43 and trapped in an 80 year old body is something of a concern. Though am in my early 50 but I really don't feel the age am in and wouldn't want to look like an old woman as yet. As much as possible I want to enjoy while still healthy and strong.
• Malaysia
1 Aug 09
I too am not aware that I am finally old.Although I am just 19 years old, but it felt as if I was just graduated from kindergarten yesterday. Time flies and the older you gets, the more you feel that time passes very fast.I wont be shocked to see I am married soon and soon to have white hairs.So far I am enjoying my life and live it to the fullest before I am to go from this world. Life is short after all. Opening and closing your eyes, the next thing you know 10 years passed and so on.
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
2 Aug 09
You are still very young and is still at your honeymoon age. You have many more interesting years ahead of you. You need not think of your twilight years now but focus on building your career to have a comfortable life later.
@suzzy3 (8342)
5 Aug 09
It comes to us all in time but keep your frillies and keep the bedroom door shut ,there is still life in the old dog yet and life can be fun although maybe not so eventful so often but there is quality in life .
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
6 Aug 09
ha...ha..ha..this is humorous. 'Old guard' are seasoned people, should be able to do marathon behind closed doors.
@krupesh (2608)
• India
5 Aug 09
Thnking about it doesn't make anyone younger.Have to think about the present & the things which should be done to the younger lot...maybe your children.Aging is not in ones hands.We have to deal with it as it comes.Life is not just with the closed doors.There are new things happening every new day.So you might enjoy the day as it comes. Everybody goes through this phase of thier lives so why fret?
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
6 Aug 09
You are right. Aging is something everyone will come to experience in one's life.
@kawalnarang (1095)
• Trinidad And Tobago
1 Aug 09
A wise man(or woman,,maybe)once said u are as old as u think,,U may write a book on this verrry interesting topic,,no matter what where there's a will there a way comes to mind,, is it too much to ask u to do very simole exercise,, 10 minutes a dsy,all of us are aware that lost time never comes back,,just like everything else,, healthcare is important,, I will restart today,,now,, Ok I did it,, 12 minutes for the good deed for my self,,yeah Thanks for encouragement Z
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
2 Aug 09
u are as old as u think I agree with you on this word. Everyone will reach this stage in life where age matters and it influences how we act and react. The worse part of me is always procrastinating my exercise regimes. I don't seem to take it consistently which I should to stay on top of the world. Beauty and health is so close to my heart and I have pen my thoughts in a blog about this issue, maybe you can check my blog and give your critics to what I wrote. You can check this out at beautyandhealthforwomenover40dotblogspotdotcom. You can figure out how to get the link in the right form.
@stephcjh (38473)
• United States
1 Aug 09
That is what I think also. There is 15 years difference between my husband and I. He is older than I am and going through things also that is age related. We still love one another and spend our time together as much as possible.
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
2 Aug 09
It is quite a gap but I think older man are more loving but not without a heavy price to pay. They are sometimes grumpy and doesn't get to understand their young wife's heart and desire. He can be a father figure to you and a husband at the same time. I prefer older man as they are more stable in their thinking.
@savak03 (6684)
• United States
1 Aug 09
Open and honest communication is the foundation of any relationship. If you have that any other problems can be overcome.
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
2 Aug 09
I agree with you. To be open and honest opens the gateway to a lasting relationship that will not rock a strong foundation.