How can I understand myself when I can't understand others?

United States
October 13, 2009 6:36am CST
This has been a mystery of mine as long as I can remember! I know I can over think it at times! Anyway I can't understand how some people make it in this world money wise! How do you they pay all their bills? How much do they make a year? How can some mom's be able to stay home and be stay at home mom's and others can't? How do people balance everthing in their lives! from jobs,kids,money,free time, and everything else! I have trouble just balancing my life of one! I couldn't handle any more! Believe me! I can't handle more then what I handle now! I have come close to a number of breakdowns over the years trying to understand the world and myself! You'd think at 47 I'd get over this? Not! I hope someday I'll understand myself and stop tring to understand everyone else!
1 person likes this
4 responses
@dawnald (84206)
• Shingle Springs, California
20 Oct 09
I would have said that the other way around, I think. How can I understand others when I don't understand myself?
• United States
21 Oct 09
You are clueless and you would of been better of not responseing to my discussion!
@mysdianait (65058)
• Italy
21 Oct 09
I had better not respond either then
@VVroom (258)
• Romania
21 Oct 09
I might be clueless too but it was enough to read this page and figure out something you let out with or without your will. My words will probably look sci- fi to you but if you search the internet, you'll se for yourself there are many people, some of them, very wise people, who are saying the same. So, here it is... our reality is the mirror of our mind. In other words, what you think, is what you get in your personal universe. Exactly like this! I'll try to be more specific on this one; it is important for you to understand there is a mind pattern (program) that you have to overcome. If you don't get respect, love and understanding in your life is most probably because you think about it in a negative way. It became part of your identity to feel sorry for yourself because nobody understands you. You get used to this situation and you keep thinking about it so, consequently you are not understood. Think about how often this idea come to your mind. Even if somebody does understand you, you will not see it because your ego will loose a part of who he/she is, if doing it. And the ego ( not your ego, any ego) has one supreme purpose: to develop a strong identity, doesn't matter what type of identity. The egos are hungry for a very clear personality. Some ego's are saying I am the best pilot in the world and those person really is a very good pilot. Some others are saying I am the most unlucky person in the world and they never win the lottery. Sometimes, some ego's are defining themselves as me, the not understood, the not respected and the not loved one. On top of this I am the moneyproblem ego! If this thoughts of looking everywhere for finding personal injustice on each corner are dominating in your mind, then your ego has the type of identity I last described. You get the point? You know why some mothers are stay at home's moms? Because they focus on staying at home and find a solution. They think about it and start doing it. What they think is what they get, right? They don't look around first, they start doing it and live their life. And then they are working to improve it each day , having the same MAIN goal: to stay at home. I will tell you another thing, you are afraid of money! Consequently, you have money problems. After all, the origin of all your problems are money. I am sure you will not care about the bills anymore. You would like to have money ( who wouldn't ) but you think making money is a terrible process, so you put just a little part of your energy into actually making money, the rest of your energy is fear of money. Because you know how hard it is to make them. Consequently you are confused about what to do exactly and start looking around and see how other people are doing it. How come other people are doing them and for me is so hard? And your ego think it's unfair. So it starts to inflate the picture, you will see injustice even where there's no injustice, creating more injustice, and more thoughts, and more and more. Vicious circle... See the pattern? The good news is that you can get out of this. And you can do it right away. Now. Actually you said it, but read your last sentence without saying 'I hope', so here it is: ' Someday I'll understand myself and stop trying to understand everyone else'. Isn't it wonderful that the solution was one of your personal thoughts? Start observing your mind. Whenever your bad thoughts are coming back, fix an imaginary alarm to ring in yourself. Oops, It's time to observe my mind. Then identify the pattern, how one thought is leading to another and how they inflate things bringing certain anxious feeling in your body. Try to identify when the ego starts to speak, when you first hear I don't deserve it or when you first feel sorry for yourself. Observe the emotion how it runs through your body. Try to figure how long it takes to that shivering. But do it as an observer, without judging what you see inside your mind. Like watching a movie. Do not let yourself involved in what's happening because then you are not observing anymore and you are back in the illusion, just watch and see the logic. You'll be surprised when you will find out that logic stops at one point and you will be aware of the fact there is plenty of non sense inside your mind. Then try to be aware of the fact that you are observing your mind. That one, the observer is the true you. The other one is your mind, which is just an instrument of your body which has this incredible power: to make you think you are your mind. But it's not! (That's ok you didn't realize this issue until now. Most of the humans beings are not aware of this.) In that very moment, when you observe your mind and you put consciousness on the existence of two entities: you and your mind, the problem is almost gone. You'll see that problem from another new point of view. You'll see how you can discipline your mind chattering just by observing it. The same way, you will find the fear of money inside you. When you put consciousness on money fear ( actually on any fear) and you'll see the stupid pattern , they become meaningless and vanish. What you have to do afterwards is to start making money. To ALLOW money to exist into your world, without being a big deal, just money. Think for yourself for a solution but focus only on that solution. nothing else should be bothering you. When your mind will try to cheat and look around to see how others are doing it, refocus. You don't need to copy others. Ignore things that were done by others. Keep thinking, keep thinking and try to be the author of your own solution. Create your own solution. Ignore all the things you already know about how to make money. Invent a new method. Remember, new! IT WILL COME! Maybe not right away, but keep thinking for days and focusing only on that thing. Find the solution and then start doing it like nothing else in the world exists. Try to do your BEST, each day and be deeply involved in it, love what you do, no matter how hard it is. You can do it. Anybody can. When the thought ' I can't , it's too hard" comes, observe your mind. Do not judge life, or others, you have other things to do: just follow your idea. You' ll succeed! Do believe in you, blue65packer. You have incredible resources inside you and you are not aware of them because you let your mind to be your master. The human mind is an incredible instrument when it's focused, that is why you are surrounded by this complicate and weird universe of injustice. That is also why the mind can find solutions and amazing ideas on everything if it is focused. It's inside you. You just have to figure out what YOU ( not the mind left alone) really want. And if you want money, you'll have them.
• United States
23 Oct 09
First I'd like to say this is the longest response I have ever recieved or seen! Yikes! My problem with money is my parents never gave me any straight answers when I asked about money! I could of found out more if I did some research but I expected my parents to tell me what I needed to know! Of course it never happen and I have had alot of trouble dealing with money over the years! I didn't know better! I had to learn pretty much about money on my own! I don't blame my not understanding myself on myself! It all started with my parents! They are the source of all my problems! If those idiots would of listen to me and answered my questions I wouldn't be so messed up! I have really no good things to say about my parents! Enough said!
@stephcjh (32303)
• United States
15 Oct 09
I never can understand alot of things about myself either. I have no problem understanding other people though. Alot of people have a hard time understanding me too though and it is very frustrating.
• United States
21 Oct 09
I will never be understood and that I want out of live besides respect and to be loved!
@Rtlsnk316 (1197)
• Mexico
13 Oct 09
Well, that's the problem, you want to figure out something that has absolutely nothing to do with your life and apparently placing it before yourself. It is not something that one should tell you, but you have to figure it out for yourself, just continue doing whatever it is that you do with your life and try to improve it everyday. Just like the title of one of my favorite songs "Nothing else matters"
• United States
21 Oct 09
Thanks for the not understanding! You were no help!