When is it ok to lie? For example,

@bryanwmc (1052)
Malaysia
October 26, 2009 8:09pm CST
When is it ok to tell a lie? Sometimes truth hurts more and has no foreseeable gain apart from making things more miserable,whereas a little white lie can avoid a bad situation, When is it ok to lie or should we tell the truth all the time despite knowing the truth is going to do more damage than good.? Lets say,a very sensitive close friend gives you an opinion on how to handle a situation, and everyone who heard it says it is a stupid idea.Even you,also thinks its a dumb idea. And this friend asks you what you think of his suggestion.Would you tell the truth and say to him its a dumb idea knowing very well you ll definitely hurt his feelings,or tell a lie and avoid a ackward situation? Again,is it ok to lie sometimes?
3 people like this
17 responses
• Philippines
27 Oct 09
I do respect the opinion of others but here is my opinion for what you are asking for.it is ok to tell the truth than to tell a lie,for me white lies is still a lie or a sin,there is no what we called gray area where you can be in the middle because it is still a sin.I would be frankly to say to my friends or to other people the things that they should know,and i know that there is no a perfect person too but as much as possible we should avoid to do it because the situation will become worst because you can't hide anything to someone or somebody,there will be a time that they will know the truth so it is better for me to tell the truth than to tell a lie.As a christian we should practice those things.
1 person likes this
27 Oct 09
It's nice to know that you're a Christian. Same here! Nice to meet ya!
@solared (1209)
• United States
28 Oct 09
When a secret holds the lives of people in the balance or maybe a country...lol
@solared (1209)
• United States
28 Oct 09
Wow thanks, I didn't expect that.
@niuniu1 (166)
• China
28 Oct 09
it's ok to lie some times,but not this situation you described,you should tell the truth in a comfortable way,it may hurt his feelings at the moment,but the reault of the idea may hurt not only his feeling.
• China
28 Oct 09
It's awful and terrible,praise his suggestion and hold it as a stupid inward.The truth maybe hurts when you tell the truth,but what makes it even worse,you praised and carry out differently,the worst is that your friend maybe realize someday,what makes him sad,is you,not the lie.have a nice day
@laydee (12809)
• Philippines
28 Oct 09
In the sample you gave, I think it's better to tell the truth. The hurt will be there, but at least you told him out front and besides he asked for it. You see, there are ways to tell someone something negative. It doesn't need to hurt that much as some would say so bluntly. You can try to ease first the moment by asking "Are you sure you want to hear my opinion?" to set the mood. It gives him the sense that perhaps you're not agreeing with him. Another way of doing so by choosing your words wisely. Instead of saying "It's a dumb idea." which would hurt anyone because you are actually insulting him, you could try saying "I don't think it would work much but perhaps if we trim the idea a little like.....". That is less intrusive and you're not undermining his intelligence. It's not good to lie, in any case. There's no logical reason to truly make a lie into a truth. You could divert the topic to another to atleast warn him/her that you're not agreeing with the statement or question. Not wanting to talk about it is much better than lying. But if they want your true opinion, you must first remind them that it's them who's wanting your real opinion on their query.
@Hatley (164170)
• Garden Grove, California
28 Oct 09
bryan You can tell the truth but be tactful, just say that you would like to hear some more ideas and maybe just use part of each one.You do not have to say you thought it was' a dumb idea, you can be more tactful and say,that was one way to do this, but we need more ideas and a bigger scope to the picture. I did not say it was dumb, you just suggest getting more input and maybe putting some of the ideas together for a solution. I lie when my friend ask me if this dress makes me look fat, or these jeans make my butt look bigger.I figure if i just say you look fantastic I can et away with it.
@Craicha (801)
27 Oct 09
but the truth is the truth no matter how you hide it from good or white lies just to avoid something and have reasons for it...but again you cant hide the truth it will do comeout in times and what if the truth came out ....its hurting more knowing the truth last or for long and since its hurting its nah easy to accept the reasons why you lied...especially the one do lies to you the person you trust most......
@cripfemme (7710)
• United States
27 Oct 09
I think sometimes it's a little okay. For example, if your best friend just bought a dress and already cut the tags off it you might not want to tell her it's the most hideous thing you've ever seen. But, if she hasn't cut the tags off yet, you might want to mention something so she can return it. Or, if you're other friend is really into Tammy Faye Baker make-up, you might want to advise them against this.
@stee09 (102)
• Ireland
27 Oct 09
Hey Bryan, I think the only time you should lie is why the truth could hurt someones feelings. I don't mean if you cheat on your partner I mean like if your girlfriend asks do I look fat in this dress etc frivolous things of that nature. I know trust id the main thing that relationships is based on so I think you should lie to people as little as possible if people find out you lied to them thats all they will think of you as so in the future it will be hard to have an open honest relationship with them.
@vandana7 (75937)
• India
27 Oct 09
Hi bryanwmc, I think in the example u have cited the friend needs to be told the truth, as in future he might face the same situation and others may not tell him as softly as u can. Well, white lie can be used here to let ur friend know the outcome. Tell him one of ur cousins or distant relative or acquaintance handled the situation and faced the repercussions. U wouldnt be telling him - hey friend u have come up with a stupid suggestion. But he would most certainly hesitate. U would have done ur bit. Using words like "stupid", "dumb", and "silly", though seemingly innocuous do hurt ego. Using white lie and not achieving the objective is bad! If u use white lie - no my friend ur idea is good would be a bad white lie, wouldnt it? Even telling white lies requires intelligence, a lot of it. :)
@mafi0831 (108)
• Philippines
27 Oct 09
i think that it is okay to tell a lie if the situation badly needed. If that lies will do good to that person, we can lie. It is just white lies. If it will be advantageous to the person, it is ok to tell a lie. For example. a friend of yours tells you that she is pregnant and she asks you not to tell it to anybody because she is still not yet ready to tell but somebody asks you that is she pregnant? they ask you because you are her bestfriend. though you know the truth, you will intend not to say it because your bestfriend told you so. Let her the one to tell it. She has a reason why she doesn't want to tell it. You should respect that. I dont want to be the one to tell.
• India
27 Oct 09
Hi, friend. For me, its never OK to lie, even though it doesn`t mean that i never tell lies. But, i try my best not to indulge in telling lie. Actually, many times, telling a lie may seem to be good for everybody and may look much better than telling a truth, but this goodness of lies lasts only for some time and eventually it leads to problems. Truth is something that may lead to problems straightaway, but, in the long run it succeeds. So, as per my experience, telling truth is always a better choice, but the best style and mode of telling the truth may differ from situation to situation. But, this is just what i think, many people may differ from my views. Happy Mylotting!!
@sender621 (14933)
• United States
27 Oct 09
I don't see how telling a lie can ever be o.k. Sooner or later the truth of your lie will come out. Bitterness and mistrust often follow. I know that people will tell that little white lie to save someone's feelings. When we do this we are only hurting the person we are trying to help.
@IMEzekieL (500)
27 Oct 09
Well there are situations where you have to lie in order to bring out the best of someone. I think it's semi-good and semi-bad. But I don't really know if it's really ok to lie in this kind of situation.
• Philippines
27 Oct 09
of course it's ok to lie sometimes. we're not saint after all. and it doesn't make us a bad person unless you do it for a bad purpose. sometimes, we don't have choice but lie. to protect ourselves from getting hurt, or to protect the one we cared for. we don't want to offend them, right? so, lying isn't that bad. and one more. sometimes, lies makes you happy and the truth gives you nothing but pain.
@bluray (408)
• Singapore
27 Oct 09
Hi friend I think, if my friend is stuck in such a situation I will definitely opt to lie.if a single lie can prevent his heart break ,its not a big deal!!.sometimes a lie can save too much.If a lie is not causing any harm to anybody than its worth saying. it is ok to lie in some situation but it should not become a habit..if your truth is not causing any harm ..then why to lie.
• Philippines
27 Oct 09
I lie when I think it is for the benefit of everyone involved. But sometimes I can't help it if its only for my own benefit. But then again, why lie if you can say the truth. It is the truth and nothing can't be done about it but to accept it. Indeed people are afraid to tell the truth because they might suffer the consequences if they don't. Admiration comes to those people unafraid to face the truth.