Boy-Girl Relationship..Questions!

@calai618 (1773)
Philippines
November 30, 2009 11:52am CST
For girls: Do you like it when guys ask you first about everything? (Can I hold your hand? Can I kiss you? Can I call you?) Isn't it awkward when you're being asked such questions? How do you answer them? If you don't want what they're asking, how do you respond? What do you prefer guys to do? For guys: Do you like asking girls first before doing anything? (Can I hold your hand? Can I kiss you? Can I call you?) If you do, why? Is it because you just wanna be courteous, appear nice or play safe (so you don't get slapped lol)? If a girl says no, does it ruin your evening, turn you off or does it instantly make you feel they aren't interested?
3 people like this
23 responses
@Iram786 (498)
30 Nov 09
i like it when they ask but at the same time i don't. i like how they respect you because they're asking your permission first but i tend to get really shy and awkward when being asked questions like that so i usually end up saying no even if i do really want it. i would prefer guys to just go ahead and do whatever they want and not bother asking although i do like it.
1 person likes this
@EvrWonder (3571)
• Canada
1 Dec 09
I think it is cute when a guy asks if he can open the door for you, if he may hold your hand or give you a kiss but personally, I prefer just do it! Not because it makes me feel awkward, therefore likely to just say no even if I do really want him to but because I would find it irritating if every time he wanted to do something he asked. Perhaps after a guy gets the go ahead or told no once he wont bother to ask again and will just do or not. Good question. Thanks.
• Virgin Islands (U.S.)
30 Nov 09
I think that after a while being asked those questions gets kinda annoying. If you are just meeting and establishing a relationship, then it shows that you are showing respect to the other person. On the other hand, if there is chemistry there between both persons, then I say go for it!
1 person likes this
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
3 Dec 09
Actually, I think when a guy asks me first about everything it makes me a little bit uncomfortable. One of the things that I've found that I like in relationships is a little bit of spontaneousness. When a guy is always asking before they do something, such as "Can I hold your hand" you are losing a lot of the sponanuity that I really like. The way that I see it personally, if they were to go too far, I would tell them about it.
• United States
3 Dec 09
It's not only the loss of spontenaety, but really, doesn't a guy like that sound far to selfconcious and unconfident? i've noticed that women seem to like self confident men, as long as they're not cocky (I'm far too cocky for most women, but having gone through the things I've been through in this life, I have a right to be cocky, if not down right arrogant), but that's the way I am. i'm not going to change the way I am for any woman, and would not expect her to change for me.
@sunnycool (12714)
• India
1 Dec 09
I had experienced this in an college summer camp which was for 15 days.I came accross a girl from another college.she was so pretty and i liked her(some thing like love at first site) and for the few days we exchanged our looks so the next day i approached her and we had a good time chatting and the next day i approached her with a flower but she expressed a firm "no" coz she said we are not so close to love each other. I felt really bad as i loved her so we continued our friendship and after 2 months she proposed me.so i am happy with her now.gud day.
@calai618 (1773)
• Philippines
2 Dec 09
Wow that is one inspiring story. You just proven that nothing is impossible. There's really happy ending when people are meant to be. I wish you all the best.
• United States
1 Dec 09
No!!! that is so boring. Why would you want a man that can't think for himself. I think it's great that you want to be courteous. But relationships are about taking risk. You need to be able to show your significant other that you can be spontaneous.
@calai618 (1773)
• Philippines
4 Dec 09
yeah i have to agree. spontaniety shows confidence and fun so it's nice when a guy knows when to move.
• India
1 Dec 09
I like when it comes out as emotions.. Not out of intentions.. Ll just answer Lets speak abt something else..!!!!!!!
@calai618 (1773)
• Philippines
4 Dec 09
wow that's very nice..thanks for sharing!!!
@anyket (106)
• India
1 Dec 09
i think initially its definitely good to ask for permission. but i think david de angelos cocky funny routine works the best. if a girl does say no u have to take it on your chin and move on
@celticeagle (159008)
• Boise, Idaho
2 Dec 09
I think this is a very good way to handle starting out on a relationship. If only all men were this way. I would be honest and if you want him to call, kiss, etc. then I would say yes. If not, then no. If I start out this way with men I meet then I can only expect the same in return. Now, isn't that fare! I think so.
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
2 Dec 09
I think that, initially a lot of questions are usually asked out of respect for the fact that the two people don’t yet know each other properly but after a while I would like to hear fewer questions and more actions! By that I mean that it is nice if he just grabbed hold of my hand or gave me a kiss without requesting permission first! I would feel too embarrassed to answer some of the questions; actions speak louder than words, after all!
• United States
3 Dec 09
I never ask. if a girl is open to holding hands, or a kiss, you can tell unless you have the sensitivity of a stone. It's kind of like that old roe, "when a woman says no, does she really mean no?". You can tell when no means no. Any other time it means "maybe, but you're gonna have to work your butt off for it". If I took no for an answer, I'd be broke, unemployed and lonely. what fun would life be then? And getting slapped? Sometimes it's worth it. Especially if the slap suprizes her more than it did you, and you didn't cause her any harm in getting it.
@sims13 (4)
• United States
1 Dec 09
I believe a guy should know when the moment is right to either hold a girl's hand or kiss her. He should definitely not ask her permission first. If a girl is into a guy (likes him) it would ruin the moment if he asked her permission to kiss her. As far as the 'can I call you' question, he may need to ask her this one because the girl may have strick parents and calling her anytime may cause problems at home for her. Overall, there are some situations for which he would definitely need her permission.
@yan_blue8 (1437)
• Philippines
1 Dec 09
Hi calai! Personally, I don't like it when a guy ask me about everything that he want to do with me. It sooo awkward I guess. If I don't want what they are asking, I'll just smile or probably say NO! I want them to do what they want and take the consequences of doing it
• Sri Lanka
1 Dec 09
I think it's good first time you wanna ask her that Can I hold your hand . But Boys usually not keep hopes deeply expect he do wish to marry her .thats the way.But girls,see his eyes when he ask .you can see whether it is for a joke or Love.
@reddream (11)
• China
1 Dec 09
I am a boy. Sure I will ask girls first before I want to call her. But in China, you know, boys usually do not ask girls "can I hold your hand" or "can I kiss you",except they are boyfriend and girlfriend relationship.
@savypat (20216)
• United States
30 Nov 09
I always liked being asked, it ment the guy saw me as a person and I had the ability to say no. Especially when we were first getting to know each other.
• China
1 Dec 09
I think you just do it when you want to do ,maybe it's a surprise to you or he .love is a beautiful thing that we just feel it ,touch it and go ahead to do it .
@PeacefulWmn9 (10420)
• United States
30 Nov 09
Hm, a very good question. If it is something extremely personal I believe it is good if a guy asks first, or too, if you've not been seeing each other long. As for calling, that is good to ask, for a woman will not want to give her number out to someone she doesn't wish to see again. Best to have that part right out in the open, even though it may hurt at the time. It's wrong to lead someone on. Otherwise, it's nice to let things take a natural course, such as holding hands while walking, or a good night kiss. Karen
@kashers (649)
• Jamaica
1 Dec 09
as for me i just let the conversation flow build the mood and just go along with the feeling,i am just too experience to acting like i don't know already what to do
@Josflch (93)
• Malaysia
1 Dec 09
hi Calai. I am a guy. It depend on the situation, normally if the thing is not so important to us, I will ask my girl friend first. This no mean that everything need to ask first, sometime are just inform her, because it show respect and honer to our relationship. If the thing like hold hand, kiss her, I always haven't ask her, because it already become a nature thing to kiss girl friend and hold her hand. How about you? Have a nice day.
@locohboi (55)
• Philippines
1 Dec 09
no i dont like it because why i will ask him right?kissing,calling and holding the hands of girl is a part of the relationship of bf/gf,if you say no to your bf it is mean that your not love your bf anymore.