Dear Prudence.... OMG, What Would YOU Do?

@CatsandDogs (13963)
United States
December 10, 2009 1:49pm CST
Last night I was on the internet just browsing around checking out the news of what's going on in our world and came upon Dear Prudence article which runs once a week like Dear Ann does every day. Now I could be wrong about that, Dear Prudence may run every day too but I see it every now and then so I really don't know how often they run their articles BUT, the point I'm trying to reach is this, the very last article or letter to her had me FLOORED!! Here's a copy of it: Dear Prudence, My brother is schizophrenic and has a violent history. He abused me when we were growing up, and even tried to kill my little brother one night when he was hearing things. Years ago, when I was 18, my brother and I were driving around when we saw a hitchhiker. We picked him up and took him back to our house. My mom was away that night. I left them drinking beers and talking in the living room when I went to bed. The next day, the hitchhiker was gone. I asked my brother where the man went. He said he took the hitchhiker to the park down the street from our house, and the hitchhiker left. I had an uneasy feeling, like maybe my brother did or said something that creeped the guy out, but maybe something else happened. My brother now is on medication, living in a halfway house, and doing much better. Through the years, I've wondered whether my brother actually snapped and killed the hitchhiker. As far as I know, there was never anything on the news about a body being found. I just told my husband my concern, and he thinks I'm crazy for thinking it. But he didn't grow up with my brother. So how do I ask my brother if he murdered the hitchhiker? —Uneasy Dear Uneasy, If your letter contained some details, such as "Ever since that night, my brother has worn a human thumb on a chain around his neck" or "The next day my brother said he spilled a ton of ketchup on the living-room rug and asked me to help get the stains out," I would consider that your speculation might have some merit. Schizophrenia is a horrible disease, and your whole family suffered because of your brother's illness, to say nothing of his own agony. However, there is absolutely nothing to indicate anything untoward happened to the hitchhiker. It is not surprising that a stranger you took into your house was gone in the morning, although it's a little more surprising that the television didn't vanish with him. Speaking of television, you have been watching way too much CSI. It is wonderful that your brother is stable and doing better, and you are to be admired for continuing to have a relationship with him, despite the pain he put you through as a girl. Don't ruin what you have now by accusing him of something awful that he didn't do. —Prudie [i]What a letter to write and what a thought to have on ones mind!!!!!! OUCH!!!! Now if you were in this guys shoes, what would you do? I think I'd have to ask my brother BUT with a ton of people in the next room just in case he attacks. Here's the link to the article:[/i] NOT A REFERRAL LINK But a link to this article! http://www.slate.com/id/2237217/?GT1=38001
7 people like this
12 responses
@Hatley (163772)
• Garden Grove, California
10 Dec 09
hi catsanddogs I have a feeling that the girl should have got a bu nch of people together then asked her brother, but in front of others so he will not flip out and hurt her, or do worse. I think she might have a point there as Prudence did not live with the brother but the sister did. she knows a lot more about what her brother was capable of than this Prudence. I know that is what I would have done as I would not have felt Prudence was completely right.
1 person likes this
@mentalward (14690)
• United States
10 Dec 09
I would listen to Prudence's advice. I'm sure they would have heard about a body showing up somewhere not too far away if the brother had actually murdered the hitchhiker. Like Prudence said, it's not unusual for a hitchhiker to be gone the next morning. If there was nothing but a 'feeling' about foul play, I'd say leave it alone. That's what I'd do, anyway. I'm sure that the brother's life before medication was pure Hell for him as well as everyone else and the less he has to be reminded of it, the better for him. If he did commit murder, I have the feeling that, eventually, it would come out, either by forensics or by his own admission. His violent temper plus the missing hitchhiker is enough fuel to get anyone's mind wandering where it really shouldn't go. But that's not enough for me to even question him about it. I'd just have to live with the question inside me.
@mentalward (14690)
• United States
10 Dec 09
I should add that, knowing what I do about schizophrenia, I doubt he would have had the mental capacity to get away with murder without being caught. Schizophrenics don't think things through. They react to whatever is going on in their heads without thinking about consequences or trying to cover up what they've done. If his intention was to kill the hitchhiker, he most likely would have done it right there in the house, then run away. Think about it, they don't have a normal brain so planning out an elaborate coverup of a murder would be something they simply could not do.
@GardenGerty (169450)
• United States
11 Dec 09
I think someone was trying to prank Prue. I know that some shizophrenics are violent, but often they are more danger to themselves than others. Their behavior is bizarre, true. I think the letter sounds contrived.
@smileonstar (4007)
• United States
11 Dec 09
HI, If I was her and I want to find out about this then I will set up a tap recorder... and try to talk about this and that, just remind him of good time first and then try to ask him if he still remember that day. But if he is doing fine... then why would i want to bother something that might make him feel upset about.
@dragon54u (31633)
• United States
12 Dec 09
In my family, my brother would have been under the care of a psychiatrist. My mom was very advanced in her thinking and has always thought mental illness was something that needed to be treated just like a physical illness--this was back in the time when people told you to suck it up and quit being a baby. In fact, I did have a brother that had some problems and my mom arranged for treatment despite the fact that her family and in-laws gave her no end of grief about it! Well, I think I would ask my brother in private. But if he was as bad as the writer's brother, he may not even remember if he did anything or not.
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
11 Dec 09
Wow, it is a bit freaky isn’t it? I suppose this person knows her brother well enough to feel suspicious; I can’t imagine having the notion that your brother could be capable of murdering someone! Is does sound unlikely that anything untoward happened to the hitchhiker because the brother, as a schizophrenic I don’t think could have planned a murder well enough not to leave any evidence, besides there were no reports of bodies being found anywhere. If she feels she wants to question her brother I would do through his doctor and preferably in his presence. Interesting story...
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
10 Dec 09
It sounds far fetched to me to be honest There is something not real about it I just can not put my Finger on it, for a start why did she not speak to her Mum the next Day and tell her, why was her Mum not informed about all the other things as her Brother would have been on Medications a lot earlier, which I would have thought he would have been anyway, it just does not sound right to me somehow
@GardenGerty (169450)
• United States
11 Dec 09
I tend to think it was a prank letter. I am with Prue on this one. I know a lot of schizophrenics. Yes, they can be violent. It just sounds too contrived.
@blackbriar (9075)
• United States
10 Dec 09
Eeeeeeeeeeeouch!!!! This is a touchy subject and I bet Dear Prudence thought as well. I would probably just ask him outright and hope for the best. But, like Prudence said, since there was no evidence of a murder and no bodies showing up, he more than likely just told the truth and took him to the park.
@SomeCowgirl (32189)
• United States
10 Dec 09
Wow, I don't what is worse, the asker's letter to Prudence, or Prudence' reply back... I think that I would not want to dredge that up, and that maybe the asker is just a bit dramatic. Not that I think she's lying, just that I think she dwells to much. I actually dwell to much on things myself. In any case, I would not want to ask because I would feel that could cause more of a stir then anything and cause the person to rocket backwards.
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
10 Dec 09
HEY CAT, sounds like a bunch of b/s to me on both sides. I could be wrong of course i am alot of the time, lol but this just sounds to far fetched to be true.
@leenie50 (3992)
• United States
10 Dec 09
Hey Mary Beth, I think the Sister shouldn't have a meeting with her brother alone either. And I don't think the Prudie should have been so dismissive of her. This girl has been living with her fears for a long time and for Prudie to be so dismissive is rude and unprofessional. As it is the Sister took a big risk writing a letter about this. I keep saying Sister but I guess he's a guy. Even still he deserves more respect. Leenie