Is it OK to tell white lies?

China
December 13, 2009 6:31am CST
In our daily life, I found not just myself but most people tell lies like you are not fat, you're looking sharp, I like your dress... When we want to be nice to somebody, sometimes we are on the side of being polite, sometimes it seems that these lies just called manner. Here's a sad thing in close relationship, sometimes people will lie to each other but if you real care the person and you wanna get the relationship back on track you can say like this: You're not telling me the truth, I wanna to have an open relationship, well we can be honest with one another. I agree with this, and you?
3 people like this
32 responses
@TheCatLady (4695)
• Israel
15 Dec 09
LOL In American English an open relationship means you can sleep with other people. I'm sure you didn't mean that. But... I think that in any relationship there is a line between being honest and being cruel. There is nothing wrong with white lies if it preserves the peace and harmony in the house. You don't need to tell you spouse the 100% truth if a small white lie will make them happy.
1 person likes this
@slovenc1 (2091)
• Slovenia
13 Dec 09
I think there will always be some white lies in any relationship. You can never be 100% honest with someone because we are all different and we like different things. If someone is trying really hard to do something you like but you would rather have him do something else you probably won't just tell him because you appreciate what he is doing. And for example if someone is a little chubby and asks you if he is fat you won't say no you are just a little chubby...you'll say no you're not fat. Well confusing arguments but i hope you understand what i mean.
1 person likes this
• Canada
16 Dec 09
I think it is ok to tell white lies. Like stealing from the rich to give to the poor, I think that's ok too.
@taheraa (1545)
• Giza, Egypt
17 Dec 09
I do not agree with you. it is deferent sitiuation.
• Philippines
13 Dec 09
Hello... As much as possible I do not want to tell a lie but some people will be offended if I don't. But you see in terms of my close friends whom I know very well that if I told them the truth they will not be offended, it is okay to tell them the truth such as when the dress don't look good on them.
@xJaiiDK (164)
• Philippines
13 Dec 09
i agree with you, sometimes you tend to lie just for them not to be hurt with what you will say.
@taheraa (1545)
• Giza, Egypt
17 Dec 09
Lies is lies, but somtime you have to lie to get the life between two married people continue in their life. to get the relationship between two friends continue. But if you see some thing wrong in you friend, you should advice him, because you at that case considered as a true friend. Advice is a good things in friendship and also in people live, and advice need from you to tell the truth and do not lie.
@jesssp (2739)
• Canada
15 Dec 09
I think that little white lies are fine to a point, as long as they stay little and aren't told too often. If my husband were to go to a lot of trouble planning something for me, for example, and then asked if I liked it or if I had fun I would probably say yes even if I didn't/hadn't. If he made something for dinner and asked if I liked it when I really didn't I would also say yes. But if it got to the point where I really didn't like ANYTHING he did for me or cooked for me then I would have to tell him the truth because we would end up in a situation where he was under the impression that I enjoyed things I really didn't. But for a rare miss I would definitely save his ego with a little, white lie.
@acer5540 (354)
• China
15 Dec 09
I think it is ok.Sometimes it is a respect of other's choice.Just like , you said, the dress is beautiful, maybe you don't like, but not mean to the one who dressed.But to close friends, i will told them my opinion according my position.And i think they can understand and not get angry.
@cerebellum (3870)
• United States
15 Dec 09
Sometimes you have to put a better light on the truth. That's not really a lie. Everyone shades the truth a little at some point. You can tell something they really don't want to hear and put it in a nice way. The trick is not to go to far either way. You don't want to tell the person a flat out lie. On the other hand you don't want to hurt their feelings.
@sharra1 (6341)
• Australia
14 Dec 09
If you did not tell them then what would your life be like? You could choose not to say anything. We call it politeness at one level and diplomacy at another. Some people live their lives doing nothing but telling lies to flatter others in order to get things they want. I see it as not making people sad, not hurting their feelings. It depends on what the lie is and it depends on the person you are lying to. I try to avoid doing this as much as possible by simply saying nothing. I always try to weigh up the situation and decide which is the best path. For example I was always polite and nice to my boss even when I did not want to because it made the office more harmonious and that was a better environment to work in.
@Ritchelle (3795)
• Philippines
14 Dec 09
in movie scenes wherein white lies are told it is not that bad, really, provided we are aware that someobody knows the actor is doing it just to be polite. so i guess it is also true, just like what you said, when this is the case in real life . it just differs if we are going to be intelligently, pleasantly polite or just selfishly polite (since we're expecting something good only for ourselves).
@qamarep (4448)
• Pakistan
14 Dec 09
yes those lies are good for you to keep up with a relationship or even save one from being broken, so you should think if something you dont like but makes you happy then is it good or not.
@aerous (13461)
• Philippines
14 Dec 09
You know, my friend. To be honest is the hardest part in the life of every individual but we can be made that if God's really on our side. It's okay to tell a lie, my friend. Whatever it is...It is still a lie that most people hated...
@LiveLove (445)
• United States
14 Dec 09
Personally I don't get the difference between a white lie and any other lie. They are all still lies and can really be detrimental to a relationship since trust is extremely important. I was raised to be honest even if it hurts so I would have to answer, no lies of any kind are not okay.
@sender621 (14934)
• United States
14 Dec 09
A lie is a lie. It doesn't matter how you dress it up. Telling any kind of lie is never a good thing. It will eventually do you in.
@arystine (1275)
• Philippines
14 Dec 09
I prefer to be really honest most of the time. But I have to admit that there are times when the white lies calls for it. For me, these are harmless lies, although am not proud that I have done it several times. I guess I did it in order to avoid arguments and to end the discussion.
• Australia
14 Dec 09
A lie is a lie, is a lie, is a lie . . . A lie will never be anything but a lie. There is no such thing as a white lie or a black lie - there is only a lie! The difference in lies is in the way they are told. Lies can be extremely hurtful, or some people tell lies in an effort NOT to hurt - but they are still lies and they are still dishonest and wrong - and they are likely to backfire and cause extra grief. Sometimes it is possible to AVOID telling a lie by concentrating on a truth. For example, a girl asks if you like her dress. You think yellow looks ghastly on her, making her look sallow, so you avoid saying what you think, and tell her how you think the style of the dress suits her perfectly but you much prefer to see her in a deep blue because it matches her eyes and highlights her beautiful blonde hair. Lies have a habit of backfiring. If I find a person tells me a lie, will I ever trust that person again? Honesty is ALWAYS the best policy.
@derek_a (10897)
14 Dec 09
White lies are OK to protect someone's feelings, particular if the truth would send them into a state of shock. It is best to be absolutely truthful about everything else though, because it is said, quite rightly, that "the truth will set you free." - Derek
• Canada
14 Dec 09
I don't think it is Ok to lie at all, no matter how small the lie is. A good example is something that happened last week, when I asked my husband if he knew how to wrap presents. He said he had no idea. I decided i was going to TEACH HIM how to do it, and he confessed that he knew all along, but didn't want to admit it, because his exes always made him wrap presents. I had all the gifts done for relatives already, and they were beautifully wrapped. I'd been giving him beautifully wrapped presents for years, but this year, instead of a a gift that arrived a little late, the things he ordered for me actually arrived on time for Christmas. I know because he asked me to order a few things from my wishlist, and take the cash out of his account. LOL I dind't want anything particularly big this year, and the things arriving late had more to do with size than disorganization, so I'm not faulting him for that. My REASON for asking him if he knew how to wrap a present, was because I wanted to make sure that, since my gifts had arrived, that I'd have something to unwrap on Christmas day. LOL So, no matter how small and harmless the lie may seem, it will usually come back and kick the liar's @$$ in the long run.
• Philippines
14 Dec 09
I am not telling lies with people I love . I tell the truth, for me it is easier to tell the truth to them because they know me and I know them. however, with different people its so hard to tell the truth sometimes. I want to be friends with everyone, what I do is not to tell them they have nice dress when they don't have. I just keep quite. But when they are asking if they look okay, I answer yes for the fact that it looks okay to me but of course different people have different eye when it comes to admiration and telling white lies. What white lies I done before is telling lies just to save a friend. That was when I was in college. i save her because I don't want her to be a big problem in our group. That is a long story. I know people do it all the time.
@liuzhi (265)
• China
14 Dec 09
We know no one wouldn't prefer to good saying.It's human nature.sometimes white lies will help you get well along with your colleagues.It's all about your attitude towards communicating with others.We should learn that tricks