still talk to my ex

United States
December 15, 2009 11:13pm CST
Despite being in Bhubaneshwar Alok still calls and writes. We talk weekly, write a couple of times a week. I'm not sure how I feel about it. Part of me is angry he is gone and I feel hurt, I also feel like his writing keeps me from getting over him. Why does he do this? If he cannot be with me, wants to be there why can he not just leave me in peace? I don't want to cry over someone I can't have, I want to be happy with the person I have. (they know we speak occasionally but they don't know I miss him)I am really depressed by the whole situation. I can't bring myself to tell him to stop writing and calling, I care for him too much but I also hurt so much.
1 person likes this
14 responses
@junmae (1586)
• Philippines
17 Dec 09
If you are hurting, then i guess that you will be the one who stop him. Ask him to leave you alone and don't mind his calls and letters. Return it back to him, if you have a partner already it is not unfair to him because you still have a feeling for your ex and it can be called cheating. If you know that this person doesn't want or cant be with you, then why still communicate with him. Cut the lines and move on, you are the one who can make the answers from it.
1 person likes this
@rsa101 (37932)
• Philippines
16 Dec 09
I think the best for the both of you is to get over with one another and maybe stopping the communications will help stop the feeling of missing one another. If you really are over each other and have your own partners already then I guess it is better to focus yourselves with the one you love right now. It is a great injustice for the ones you are supposed to love and behind their back of your current lover you are still missing you ex. If you really are missing your ex then I think you don't deserve to love another just to hide you feelings for your ex. You should love when you are already moved on with your past or if you just used your current relationship just to hide your past feelings towards an ex then you will never be happy with your current relationship.
1 person likes this
@shellback (864)
• Philippines
16 Dec 09
Well I think you still love him, Is he having another woman? if he was, it much better to find another man because he dont love you anymore, frankly I say, go on, have your self a happy and comfortable day, because this is not the end of the world..lol. smile..
• United States
16 Dec 09
No. There is no other woman. His job sent him back to India and his parents are very conservative so they were not thrilled with the idea of me joining the family. Yes I still love him, but I wish I could stop...or that he would just come back. He hates heat and bad weather, I spoiled him entirely too much when he was here I made huge breakfasts every morning, took care of him when he was sick....
@ankush19 (154)
• India
16 Dec 09
obviously you still love him.i think you are not aware of this fact but yeah i think that you have feelings for him which are pretty strong.i'l just advice you that don't feel low.don't get angry.n don't cry.let life go as it is going.just live it to the fullest with a long lasting smile.things will get better with time.for sure.
@coolhaze (28)
16 Dec 09
wow...For me, you need to have space to be with other person or couple of friends of you so you can move on. It is better not to talk to each other because is still fresh the break-up. Because, how you can move on without him if you will keep on seeing & talking to him. It's not right time to talk as if nothing happen between you and him, of course it's really hurt specially on your part. So, if better to have space with him or his company and be busy with something. If the pain removes, that's the time you can talk to each other as if nothing painful situation happen between the two of you.
@myramae19 (667)
• Philippines
16 Dec 09
hey blue! It seems u still love each other, I know that's a tough situation. just try to open up with him about this, about your feelings and thoughts toward him,..hmmmm then it would be much better if u both agree to watever desicion you'll made. If you guys really meant to be,watever trials or obstacle will come, at the end everything would be alright. As for now just try to have some space or room to breath, so that u can think carefully and for you to know whats the best thing could be done.
@lyzabelle (1668)
• Philippines
16 Dec 09
Whoever said that letting go of someone you love is very easy. Sometimes...you have to accept the fact that the one we love today might be gone tomorrow. Hard to accept but we must be ready. It's the only way to make things easier. And start a new life with out living in the past. May you overcome your pain.
@advokatku (4033)
• Indonesia
16 Dec 09
Love is indeed beyond logic and common sense because the real love comes from the heart which more sensitive to the feelings And women far more sensitive than men. what you are doing the same as what the saying goes: "Surely every woman can forgive all the mistakes of male but Women will not be able to forget mistakes let alone a male whose name is associated with molester".
@ebuscat (5935)
• Philippines
16 Dec 09
If that situation just tell him in a frank way what his reason for still communicating and ask him do it is mean you love me or do you not to think that we break so tell him that he don't do that again.
• Philippines
16 Dec 09
hey blue.. in my opinion you should stop communicating with your ex.. i mean its not healthy.. you communicate with him but at the end of the day you still know that you cant own him.. he just keeps you wondering why he is writing to you and then you also wonder why he is doing this.. so i suggest move forward with your life and find a guy that truly deserves you.. have a nice day..
@anniege (202)
• China
16 Dec 09
Hi blue. It seems difficulty for you to let it go. Do you still love him and does he have new girl? If yes. Please leave him away and you should learn how to protect yourself. I can see from your photo that you are a beautiful and attractive girl and you should have a good relationship. Smile to your life and it will do the same to you!
@DenverLC (1143)
• Philippines
16 Dec 09
He just wanted you not to feel lonely, and maybe he cant just leave you while still in a situation of pain and heartache because your relationship with him did not work that good. Never think he still loves you, never fool your self by believing he can be yours just like before, as you said he is with someone. For you not to be hurt the second time around. Take what he is doing now as a kind favor for you to move on easily.
@maria1081 (1251)
• Philippines
16 Dec 09
I know how it feels. Communicating with an ex-boyfriend is really painful when you still have feelings for him. But its up to you if you wanted to feel hurt by letting him hurt you or decide to end those feelings for him since you know that you can not bring back the past anymore. Be true to yourself and think of the people that you both might hurt in the process. In the event that both of you are still free in the end then thats the only time you can love without hurting others.
• Philippines
16 Dec 09
huh...you have the same experience with my best friend..actually She is still inlove with his ex but I keep talking to her not to talk with Him because there is no way they can catch up with their relationship because thats 4 years after I think till now she keeps on hoping..but Im worried about here becuase She's only hurting herself....thats why I told her not to talk to him..maybe thats same way as yours if he can't be with you gurl...