Why don't children like school?

January 21, 2010 8:52am CST
I have a 10 year old and getting him to school is an uphill struggle from 9 o'clock the night before!!! The bedtime routine is awful, he starts to say that he feels sick, his leg huts, his back hurts, he has tummy ache... everything you can think of! and in the morning he is even worse! I am getting really stressed about this now and would appreciate some help. I have been to the school and they said he is fine when he is there... Just don't know what to do!
9 people like this
32 responses
• India
21 Jan 10
he he..!! now thats an interesting question dude... everybody just hats school other than the recess time.. no one likes the studies their, the teachers and the most importantly the strictness their.. thats why no one likes school..
1 person likes this
@ladym33 (10990)
• United States
21 Jan 10
You may need to sit down and gently talk to him and ask him what is going on in school and if he is having some trouble. It could be that someone is bullying him and he does not want to go to school to endure the bully, or he could be feeling tension from his teacher or another adult at the school. If not a problem with another person he might be struggling with a certain subject or project. If he loved school before and all of the sudden does not want to go then there is something happening there, let him know that it is OK for him to confide in you and urge him to talk to you about what is going on. Do it in a very nice and loving way. Hopefully you will find out what is bothering him.
@andy77e (5161)
• United States
21 Jan 10
To me a 10 year old is practically an adult. Clearly he hasn't matured enough, and I would ask the question why, to yourself. As to the solution, it seems simple to me. Every single time he complains about feeling sick, grab the absolute worst tasting medicine you possibly can, and shove it down his throat. He'll quit complaining real fast. If his leg hurts, put him in a cast, and have him limp around for a few days. My parents taught me something important. You need to respond to child, with greater force and conviction, than how they respond to you. Right now, your child and you do not have established rolls. He's playing you like a fiddle, and you are getting stressed by it. Stand up for yourself, and take control of the situation.
• United States
21 Jan 10
Hopefully you're not a parent,a 10 year old is nowhere close to being an adult,and if a boy less so. Resond to a child with support , help. Have a good night, less negative.
@andy77e (5161)
• United States
21 Jan 10
I guess it depends on where you're from, and what kind of parents you have. For me, doing what this kid was doing, would have yielded a very bad response from my parents, and rightly so. I'm a better person because of it. Moreover, if you look at the history of the US, in earlier times, a child would be doing tons of chores around the house, can shooting game for food, and helping with other things, by the time they were ten. Certainly lying about being sick and complaining and whining about hurt legs, would never fly. You say you hope I don't have kids, but I would love them enough to teach them not to do this. I meet people who are in their 50s and act exactly like that kid, because their parents never loved them enough to teach them otherwise. You should love your kids enough to teach them how to be good adults. If you don't, you are a lame excuse for a parent.
• Philippines
21 Jan 10
There are children who are not that ready for school, either they were not properly prepared for it or they are simply are not done with playing. Other children would feel sick, stomach aches, nausea, etc. They are not inventing the illness. They truly feel the symptoms. I am saying this because my daughter had gone thru this. She was anxious because she transfered to another school. So, on the first month in her new school, she would have stomach aches everyday and would cry on her way to school. A pediatrician once told me that there is a case called child anxiety. Children feel anxious in new environment. There can be lots of other reasons. I also found this link. It may bring enlightenment. http://www.npadnews.com/child_anxiety.asp
• Philippines
21 Jan 10
correctio: *they simply are not done with playing
• Philippines
24 Feb 10
I believe it has a reason behind. You can ask your son what is happening at school. Either the class subject is giving him problems, like he can’t comprehend with the lesson, or he don’t like his teacher or someone is bullying him. I believe there is something happening at school that is why he avoids school. Children are sometimes stress at school that is why they don’t like to be there. For them they don’t have freedom , because there is a teacher that will order them what to do and simply they don’t like to be in school. They don’t understand why children have to be in school . as a parent maybe you need to explain to them what will be the advantage of having education and also ask the help of the teacher or advisor so that you can explain fully what can be the help of learning inside school.
@nrn2003 (669)
• United States
26 Jan 10
i am sorry that you are having problems with your child going to bed and getting up for school. The best thing I have seen is watching Super Nanny. She gets it knocked down with the bed problem. Put the child in bed and sit on the flor, but make no eye contact. If the child gets out of bed, pick him/her up and put them back in bed. Not speaking or holding or cuddling. This may take time, but eye witness, it works. Then getting up in the morning. Give them an alarm. go in a few minutes before it goes off and tell them its almost time for your alarm. Think about getting up....make them get ready on their own. They will do it. If they dont tell them they will go to school in their PJs...i have seen it work. School is hard on kids. They get picked on and its just a long day. But keep them enthusiastic about it. If your chil dis getting picked on. Do something about it. Talk to the principal. Thats what they are there for.
@aerous (13461)
• Philippines
25 Jan 10
It's the case but some kids have no interest to go school and learn something or to educate them. We don't actually know why they aren't interested in discovering or learning something that makes them capable in many other areas...? There are different reason through this matter but no definite answer why they aren't go to school?
• Bangladesh
23 Jan 10
Hey Dear! This happens when the school turns out to be an uninteresting and bothersome place. All the kid need to be asked politely by their parents and find out the reason behind the problem. The teachers' interference in this matter can also ease the fix. In my school days I also encountered the problems. There were times when I preferred to enjoy something more interesting (e.g. watching cartoon on TV, reading story books, angling, playing with my playmates etc.) to going to school. But after several years when I changed my school and my classmates proved to be more interesting than the tasks I liked most, I became a regular school-goer. Therefore, when the school becomes a source of their entertainment, kids spontaneously goes to school.
@JamesKYTan (1607)
• Malaysia
23 Jan 10
Hi, I think not all children hate school. Some like school.For children to like school, the teachers must be able to create a keen interest in the lessons for the students to enjoy. Teachers play a very important role in the education. They must be able to motivate the children to study.
• China
23 Jan 10
He must be afraid of something. Ask what hurts him?
@kquiming (2998)
• Philippines
22 Jan 10
hi there, i think he just wants your attention, just my opinion though, my 5 year old kid does the same thing, although not on a daily basis lol. Talking really helps and the fact that I could tell 98% of the time if my child's lying.
@kyel_11 (1069)
• Philippines
22 Jan 10
i believe that children prefer playing rather than studying at school. so usually they become very lazy going to school since they want to stay at home to just play and play.
@drawan (66)
• Indonesia
22 Jan 10
Once the child is still a schoolgirl at my age, many complain that adults think a schoolboy was a small child can not regulate adult business
@srganesh (6345)
• India
22 Jan 10
At the age of ten,he should have known to digest this school going custom to learn something.It is those kids in their kinder gardens who make a scene daily to go to school.I wonder why your son at the age of 10 is denying.May be he is having a tough time with his teachers.Just have a personal visit to the school and inquire about his behavior in school.that will help a lot.
@umabharti (3976)
• India
22 Jan 10
Children dont like to go to school.i also never liked school.didnt like games class. was not with a group or friends.was not interested in studies.You are more with him so u might notice his behaviour.
• India
22 Jan 10
Ok mariakirk.In some school the timing is very bad and not suitable for children.In some of school teacher are forcing children to read more and more.There are avoding to learn children other curicullar activities like game,song,dance etc.If they do this then education will be quite simple.the main aim of education is to make student well educated not well trained.
@SHAMRACK (8521)
• India
22 Jan 10
Dear friend, I hope most of school in India have outdated education system, may be childern would like to come to school if they have something interesting to get from there. Hence I feel school should give children something interesting to study not hating to study. Schools are mere factories producing products for the industries. Children are not machines they have feelings and emotions and these are to protected to upheld their dignity. May be system of education needs a change.
@Cutie18f (9560)
• Philippines
22 Jan 10
I guess all kids are like that. School time is really stressful time for all parents, from waking up to nighttime. I think you are not alone. I know a lot of parents complaining the same thing. School is stressing them out and we see this in the behavior of kids.
• Philippines
22 Jan 10
I bet he doesn't have friends in school or he doesn't know how to make friends. The teacher might also be the reason. The teacher may be strict. I think you have to accompany him to school until he is used to having other people around or until he had some friends.
@salonga (27830)
• Philippines
22 Jan 10
Well maybe your child is not comfortable with with he is getting in the school so he is not excited to go there and would do any alibi just to get rid of getting there. Or maybe because his is not getting enough sleep the night before so he would not want to wake up early. Your child needs some good encouragement. Just talk to him and make him understand what he should go to school. Also examine what kind of teacher he has, what kind of classmates he is dealing with. He should develop as many friends as he could in the school so that schooling would be a real enjoyable thing for him.