Forgiving ourselves.
By Pose123
@Pose123 (21635)
Canada
January 29, 2010 7:55pm CST
Are you one of those people who find it easier to forgive another than to forgive yourself? The world is full of such people and most of them are very unhappy. We may be fifty years old and unable to forgive ourselves for something that we did at nineteen. Are you the same person that you were at nineteen? Most of us have grown a great deal since our teenage years and there's no comparison to who we were then and who we are today and the only way to deal with it is to accept this. Let the man or woman you are today, picture that young person that you were and forgive him or her. Often when we do this we do ourselves a great favor.
1 person likes this
5 responses
@wolfie34 (26770)
• United Kingdom
30 Jan 10
I still find it extremely hard to forgive things that I have done in the past, for me they have been wrong choices and decisions that even after 10 years I will chastise myself for continually, they play on my mind and sometimes when I feel low I will even call myself names fit to burn! It does seem meaningless in a way because there is no way we can go back and do things differently, of but if... of if but only... etc... I have forgiven others for dire misdeameanours against me forgiving others is indeed easier than forgiving yourself because we expect ourselves to be perfect and when we fall beneath these standards no matter how slight we are quick to blame and punish ourselves!!!! It's a learning curve and we have to make these mistakes to learn and flourish in life but at the time and sometimes in my case even after 10 years I still punish myself for saying yes instead of no.
@Pose123 (21635)
• Canada
31 Jan 10
Hi wolfie, Thank you for commenting and there are many who think this way. As I said you must remember that you are not the person you were ten years ago, we all learn and grow. There are many things that I did as a young man that I would not do today, but I have forgiven that young person because he didn't understand things as I do today. Maybe if you were to look at yourself as you were, 10 or 20 and see yourself as another person (and you really aren't that person), then you could forgive him just as you forgive others. This is just a suggestion, and maybe it sounds crazy to you, but you really need to find something that will work for you. Blessings.
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@eileenleyva (27555)
• Philippines
31 Jan 10
Hi pose, I was not a bad teen-ager, nor was I a craggy youth. But somewhere in my past I also made mistakes which, had I been wiser, I simply would not commit. But things had happened and what I did is in the past. Have I regrets? Definitely. And forever I live with such mistakes. But what is life without those mistakes. We learn and try to forgive ourselves. I just hope that one day, when I finally meet my Creator, He would not be too hard on me. I absolutely want to be in His kingdom.
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@Pose123 (21635)
• Canada
31 Jan 10
Hi eileenleyva, Thank you for your response and I don't believe any of us have to worry about being forgiven by the one who understands all things. If we want a better life here however, we must learn to forgive ourselves and it's not as difficult as we sometimes think. Our younger self is not the person we are now, just forgive her/him as if it were another person and in a sense it really is, because it isn't the person we are now. Blessings.
@Mirita (2668)
• United States
30 Jan 10
Yes, we need to concentrate on the here and now ,and forget about what could
had been done in the past because there is reason for everything and our way
of thinking is very different once we become mature individuals. We need to
start forgiving ourselves in order to find inner peace.
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@kquiming (2997)
• Philippines
30 Jan 10
I agree with you. I sometimes experience that kind of forgiveness issue, with myself and not others mostly. I sometimes find myself exercising forgiveness again and again, over the same thing. Sometimes I just have to get over things over and over again.
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@jasmeena (846)
• Indonesia
31 Jan 10
People change, and it is up to them whether they can change to be a better, or worse person. Sometimes we re being haunted by our bad past, and actually it is not that serious. I think it will depend whether people have positive self-concept or not. If they have positive mindset, they can forgive themselves easily
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