Feeling Needed
By ANTIQUELADY
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
United States
May 27, 2010 11:12am CST
A frienD's daughter called me last sat. & told me they were going out of town & would i check on her mom. I have done this before for her. Her mom lives by herself & is really afriad to be by herself. She has an alarm system now so that makes her feel better. That's a bad feeling to not feel safe in your own home. I have enjoyed talking to her a couple of times a day this week & it has made me feel needed. I miss that feeling. MY kids don't need me anymore & i miss that feeling very much. Do u feel needed by anyone anymore?
9 people like this
23 responses
@lelin1123 (15595)
• Puerto Rico
27 May 10
I know exactly what you mean. Not working now for two years after working for 32 years I feel unneeded and leaves you feeling worthless. I know my one daughter still needs me at times to watch my granddaughter but that will change once I move to Puerto Rico and her and her family to Florida. Its a weird feeling after people have depended on you for certain things during your lifetime.
2 people like this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
28 May 10
Thanks for your response. It is not a good feeling for sure. When are u moving? Have a good night.
1 person likes this
@lelin1123 (15595)
• Puerto Rico
28 May 10
I'm moving once my house is sold. I'm hoping before the summer is over. I really don't want to spend another winter here. I love the warm weather.
1 person likes this
@rocketj1 (6955)
• United States
27 May 10
Hi Jo! You are so helpful to other people!
My kids are becoming more independent (12 and 15 and 1/2) and it's difficult for me to realize that my help is not necessary for a lot of things now. Yes, I'm still needed but they are slowing pulling away and becoming more mature. This is good and what you raise your kids for, but nevertheless, it leaves me feeling a lack of purpose. I'm sure it will get even worse when they leave home!
It's great to chat with you again! Hope all is well with you!
@cynthiann (18602)
• Jamaica
27 May 10
@rocket. They may leave but often they come back and it is a different relationship. You are still their Mom and you pray that they won't return with various studs strategically placed in various parts of their body
I know that they are supposed to leave but mine don't! They keep coming home (and I love it!) Especially when they bring the grands.
I know that they are supposed to leave but mine don't! They keep coming home (and I love it!) Especially when they bring the grands.2 people like this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
27 May 10
Hery heidi, thanks for respoding. I do try to be helpful to others. It is sad when u realize your kids don't need u like they use to.Hold them close as long as u can.
@elitess (5070)
• Ipswich, England
27 May 10
Hi there antique lady.
Well being young does have it advantages, at this age (22) i am needed by loads of people, but who knows what will happen when i will be older, or if i succeed, when i move to another country and i only know people i can count on my fingers there ? If i do end up in England as my and my girlfriend's plan mainly is, i will probably get to meet a few mylot-ers there (like ellie and aliceinwebland :D) which would be really great for us being online mylot friends for over 2 years now :D
2 people like this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
27 May 10
Enjoy that feeling for as long as u can. I hope u make it to england if that's what u want.I'm sure u will make alot of new friends when u get there, Thanks for responding & good luck.
1 person likes this
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
27 May 10
sadly, theres times i feel to needed. only thing is i cant always come through altho i try. i do like being needed by my kids sometimes but i just dont always have the energy or money or whatever they want. im really not needed by anyone else it seems. just my kids
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
28 May 10
It is nice they still need you, bon. Thanks for responding. I don't like the feeling when mine need me just for money. I closed the bank on that. They are both working & making alot more than i did. They need to learn to take care of their money better.
@cynthiann (18602)
• Jamaica
27 May 10
It was very kind of you to offer to check on the lady. So many people, wherever they live, are afraid to live by themselves. I haven't yet felt the feeling of not being needed. My kids still need me - too much maybe
However, you may feel that they don't need you but they do. Everyone needs their mother and grandmother. I am sure that Ryan needs you too. He*l! I need you!
However, you may feel that they don't need you but they do. Everyone needs their mother and grandmother. I am sure that Ryan needs you too. He*l! I need you!2 people like this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
28 May 10
Thanks cynthi, i like helping people. SHE ASK ME TO RIDE W/HER TO TWO CEMETERIES TO PUT FLOWERS on her husband/s grave & others today & then we had lunch out. I enjoyed the day w/her. She's a very nice lady. Thanks for responding. I need u to, thank u. hugs.
@frontvisions101 (16043)
• Philippines
27 May 10
Yep. I'm still needed by my youngest brother. He's still in highschool so He's still learning how to get around stuff. I wanna always be his guide to everything. I want him to ask me things he wants to know. I also want to instill in him the right way to live.
2 people like this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
28 May 10
Good for u, that is wonderful. He is very blessed to have a big brother like u. Thanks for responding.
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
7 Jun 10
Hi Jo
I love being needed, I can't say my Children do not need me any more they just do not need me as much any more, but I know a few of my Friends need me and I do my best to help them over the Net, Gissi needs me
It is good to be needed
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
8 Jun 10
Hey Gabs, i'm glad u have people that need u. U are very fortunate your kids still do.I don't feel like mine need me at all anymore. I miss that to. Thanks for responding.
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
28 May 10
I'm glad u are needed. Guess sometimes that could get old maybe but i'd be willing to give it a try. Happy weekend, thanks for your response.
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
28 May 10
I understand that very well. I have always had to have some 'me time' but now i have too much of it, lol.
@chertsy (3798)
• United States
6 Jun 10
Actually, I'm needed by a few people all the time it seems. I guess they figure since I'm a stay at home mom, that I don't go anywhere. So they ask me to babysit all the time. One owes me for 8 days of babysitting, which I'm suppose to be paid on the 15th. I have two kids of my own that need me to do things for them all the time. So, I get tired of babysitting after awhile. Hopefully, last Thursday was my last day. I feel a lot of times, I'm being used than being needed. A totally different thing and feeling.
1 person likes this
@chertsy (3798)
• United States
7 Jun 10
I don't have to worry about babysitting again. They found other people, since they know after 8 days it will cost them more. I just hope when they pay me, they won't under pay me. One of those weeks was very stressful for me, because two of the 3 kids didn't listen and was always complaining that one got to do something while the other didn't. The last two days of babysitting, they were good kids. I just don't want to babysit anymore. I actually had a ok Sunday. It was quiet. I don't get many days like that anymore. I hope you had a good one as well.
1 person likes this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
6 Jun 10
good morning, thanks for responding. I hate the feeling of being used by someone .I hope u get your money for your babysitting. I probably wouldn't do her any more favors. Hope u have a good sunday.
1 person likes this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
8 Jun 10
U can just get burnt out doing most anything. I'm glad u don't have to do that anymore, hope u get your money.
1 person likes this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
27 May 10
Gosh Jo, I feel needed every time I open my email and someone is asking for money, or donations, or whatever! LOL And I do my best to help out. But it would be so nice if someone just emailed me to say, "Hey, I need to hear the sound of your voice, give me a call sometime".
Personal contact is so important to our emotional health don't you think?
And I still have kids calling home for advice and nurturing, and that makes me feel really needed...............though often their timing sucks! ROFL
2 people like this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
27 May 10
Hey stranger, been wondering about u. I'm glad u feel needed, it's a good feeling i think. I don't get those kind of e-mails but it's just as well that i don't. Personal contace is very important. Thanks for responding. Take care.
@salonga (27775)
• Philippines
28 May 10
It's nice to feel somebody needs you and you are a big help and delight to him or her. I'm sad for your friend for she seems to be insecure. It is a good thing you are always there when she needs you.
Now with you kids not seem to need you anymore. I understand your feeling. I know so many parents whose children have grown old enough and living by themselves who feel the same way. It seems like their children don't need their parents anymore. But children must realize that even if they don't seem to need their parents anymore,they owe their parents some respect, love and attention. I hope your kids will be sensitive enough to your feelings.
Meanwhile, be happy my friend because there are many other people around who need your presence and company.
1 person likes this
@salonga (27775)
• Philippines
29 May 10
I could not help but be teary with the sad story of your friend. I wish I could be beside her just like you so that I could give her some comfort in my own little way. All I could do now is to pray for her. Kindly tell her I will pray for her each morning during my Quiet Time with Him. May I know her real name I want to mention her exact name in my prayers.
Mothers or should I say parents could never be too busy for their children indeed. I believe you dear. Your sons are parents too and sooner or later they will realize what they've deprived you as their children grows old and ignore them just as they are now doing to you.
Meanwhile friend, cheer up! You have many good blessings to count. I know your children loves you. It is just that they don't know how to make you feel the love.
Have a nice weekend my friend!
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
6 Jun 10
Good morning, Thanks for always being sooo sweet. her name is louise. She's a sweetie like u.Happy sunday to u.
1 person likes this
@salonga (27775)
• Philippines
6 Jun 10
Hi! Kindly tell Louise someone here in the Philippines is praying for her. Have a wonderful day!
Have a wonderful day!
@bellis716 (4799)
• United States
28 May 10
My husband's drivers license expired on the first day of May. That makes me the designated driver for this family. Thus, I'm very much needed.
1 person likes this
@Christmas2006 (1661)
• United States
28 May 10
I absolutely hate to drive with my husband in the car. I don't go fast enough, I go to fast, I go to far to the right, I go to far to the left, I am to close to the car in front of me, Iam going to slow!!! And we haven't gone 1 mile yet!!!! Best of luck to you.
1 person likes this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
28 May 10
Good morning Bellis, I bet u are needed. Do u feel like u are running a taxi yet, lol. Have a good one. thanks for responding.
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
28 May 10
Good morning Lou Ann, u make me gladder than ever i don't have a worrisome husband, lol.
@JenInTN (27514)
• United States
28 May 10
Yes..but I know those days are numbered. I wonder sometimes what it will be like for me when I'm not a "mom" anymore. I had my first child pretty young and to be honest...being a mom is all I can really remember being of any true importance in my life. It has been the only thing that I could be truely sure when I laid my head down each night.
1 person likes this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
6 Jun 10
I don't think i knew u had a son. They are roses to but have big ol' thorns, lol.
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
28 May 10
Hi JEN, I think girls are different from boys. U have heard the saying a daughrer's a daughter all her life a son's a son till they take a wife.I WAS PROUDER OF THE JOB OF BEING A MOM MORE THAN I EVER have been anything i've done & to have doubts now that i wasn't as good as i thought i was really hurts. Hope u have a great weekend.Hope it's a long one for u. hugs, jo
@frontvisions101 (16043)
• Philippines
27 May 10
Yep. I'm still needed by my youngest brother. He's still in highschool so He's still learning how to get around stuff. I wanna always be his guide to everything. I want him to ask me things he wants to know. I also want to instill in him the right way to live.
2 people like this
@cream97 (29087)
• United States
28 May 10
Hi, ANTIQUELADY. Yes, I do feel needed most of the time. By my own children. I have to keep a strict eye out on them. I don't want them to hurt themselves. I agree, it is bad when a person can't even live in their very own homes because of fear. I am glad that you went to check up on her. I am pretty sure that it made her feel relieved and secure.
1 person likes this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
28 May 10
Good morning & thanks for responding.Your children do need u, enjoy that & hopefully they want grow up to not need u. Hope u have a happy weekend.
@neildc (17239)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
28 May 10
it is really good to know that someone needs you. but it feels a little sad? when you feel that they do not need you anymore. i hope my father won't feel this way, as he is the closest person to me, next to my deceased mom. of course, my own family is not a question or part of this situation or feelings.
1 person likes this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
28 May 10
It is sad. Make sure your dad doesn't ever feel that way. I'm sorry about your mom. Thanks for responding.
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
28 May 10
I have an eight year old and she still makes me feel very needed indeed! I also have my pets who I know need me and I hope my husband does too although he probably wouldn’t admit it! At this stage of my life I still feel pretty indispensable and it does get too much at times because I crave for more ‘me’ time! I guess, at this stage, it is hard to imagine needing to be needed more because all I want s the opposite just for a while!
1 person likes this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
28 May 10
Good morning Paula, i know exactly what u are talking about. When my sons were still home & i was working like a turk i craved me time to. Yours will be here before u know it, lol. Thanks for responding, have a good weekend.
1 person likes this
@med889 (5941)
•
28 May 10
Sometimes when I am alone or even when I feel alone I think I should have been with someone who would definitely like my staying with him, then I think to feel like this is completely normal for human beings because we have feelings and we want to have someone like this too.
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
28 May 10
Good morning & thanks for responding. I know what u mean.I have been by myself a long time & it still beats what i was living in w/my ex. Hope u have a happy weekend.
@vandana7 (98826)
• India
28 May 10
Hi Antiquelady, I dont have that need to be needed. My life is very much ok today is fine I have to do this, this, this, and then tomorrow morning this, this.... and if I do this, and that ... I will be in this position... and so I wont have to be dependent on anybody! Ultimately, it boils down to that!
I have never been needed! Oh! I know I do somethings for my papa, and may be he might need me. I dont want to think of anything beyond.
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
28 May 10
I try to stay busy to, that's good medicine i think. Since i can't work anymore i have to look for things to do around the house sometime.I bet your papa appreciates what u do for him. happy weekend & thanks for responding.
@ernkjha (46)
• India
28 May 10
Hi, i always feel needed by my family members and friends whether for some sort of help or some important discussions and no doubt for fun.
I feel good when i m being contacted by them and they too think i have an important part to paly in their life.
1 person likes this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
28 May 10
Good morning & thanks for your response. U are very fortunate to have family that needs u. I have lost all my family but my kids & THEY DON'T SEEM TO NEED ME ANYMORE.
