Have You Develop Patience with an autistic Family Member? -HONEST ANSWERS NEEDED
By carsoc
@carsocmaguinsay (417)
Philippines
June 26, 2010 10:29pm CST
When you began to understand the health condition of a family member being diagnosed with autism, you probably resolve with yourself that you must provide special attention to that member of your family. But in the long run, they seem to be so annoying sometimes that test the degree of your patience. Had you develop patience for them? Have you not unintentionally hurt them physically? Have you experience discrimination from the neighbors because you have an autistic brother/sister or child? Facing such situations, have you learned to truly accept that life isn't really fair?
5 responses
@cadguy08 (1224)
• Canada
27 Jun 10
I really pity you and family of yours about your autistic family member, my wife is an RCA which she handle with Autistic persons which is very pitiful in the way that they are not normal way to live. You have to sacrifice and love them. Herein Vancouver they don't mine if you have autistic family member they are really taking care by the Gov't- mean supply all the necessary things and money to the autistic person. They are not been laughafable or discrimination here they are human to lived here.
@carsocmaguinsay (417)
• Philippines
27 Jun 10
Cadguy08, I really admire the way your government takes care of such liabilities. In our area, only few are aware and able to understand this health condition. My autistic sister had stop going to school and therapy sessions due to financial constraints. As a consequence, she got uncontrollable but we do love her and trying our best to provide all her needs... Thanks!
@carsocmaguinsay (417)
• Philippines
27 Jun 10
subtlesubmissive: please consider language barriers. maybe cadguy haven't able to choose the appropriate word and he only wishes to express his sympathy.
@rene12 (794)
• Philippines
27 Jun 10
I am a guy with a very long patience except for repetitiveness like asking who are you? for like 5 times. But autism is different, I had a friend when I was little who has autism but I don't have problems with him. He is good and doesn't talk much, he just plays with us. I won't hurt someone just because I was annoyed :D
@mommaj (23112)
• United States
27 Jun 10
My son has classic autism that is "extreme". He is relatively good though. You can't say someone has a mild for of autism because of the way they act. Truth is the child's parents probably dealt better with the child and the environment the child was in helped mold the child into what he or she became. Any child that is uncomfortable will withdraw. This is especially true with autistic children. Yelling scares them. Maybe that is why your sister responds and reciprocates with sign language.
rene12's friend probably sat and played because he didn't feel "threatened" or uncomfortable. My son will play in the same areas as others and sometimes he will even play the same thing as others. He won't talk though.
@carsocmaguinsay (417)
• Philippines
27 Jun 10
Your friend has mild autism or Asperger's syndrome. They are much easy to handle compared to extreme cases.
@Foxxee (3650)
• United States
4 Jul 10
I have an Autistic son. I don't blame anyone & I don't need to accept that life isn't fair, because I feel life has actually dealt me a good hand in life. I have a wonderful family & friends who treat us as they would anyone else.
Having someone who is Autistic in the family isn't the end of the world. I count my blessings everyday & wouldn't change our life.
SOme have it way worse off then we do.
So I hope people don't pity us for having a child who is Autistic, pity yourself for not understanding.
As for patience... well, you do have to have a lot of it.. :)
@mommaj (23112)
• United States
27 Jun 10
I am giving you an honest answer. You may not want to hear it, but if you think about it there may be something to it. You also cannot look at life as an equality challenge. We all make our lives what we can with the hand we were dealt. If we were all the same life would be pretty boring.
First and foremost, the person with autism may be getting more attention, but it should only be when they NEED it. The person with autism should be treated like a person. My advice is to treat the person on their MENTAL age level and the person won't need as much attention as someone who isn't being treated in an understanding manner. You will find if you treat the person like their mental age you will not have to give them extra attention. They will be able to understand you and you will not feel like you are always fighting them.
As far as patience, you have to look inside of yourself to see what makes your temper short. If it is because of the way the person is acting, what can you do to change it? Maybe spinning or flapping is making you impatient. What causes the action? Usually this is a stim that is triggered by stimulus or surrounding. You may play loud music or yell and that triggers this action in the autistic person. You can change it, if you want to! Figure out the cause and reverse it for the cure.
A tip that may help is SCHEDULE. Most autistic people do not like change. They need a schedule to know what is happening. If you can supply a schedule and leave room for an "unexpected" occurence in the day, that will help the autistic person adapt to change. Repititiveness is KEY.
@jasmeena (846)
• Indonesia
27 Jun 10
My brother-in-law`s cousin has 3 autistic sons.She truly accepts it and treats them like other kids.She and her hubby never give up in motivating their sons and the kids now can socialize like normal kids, my nephew likes playing with them. It doesn`t mean that life is unfair. life is a test, and everyone will have different test in life.It depends on us how to see that test given by GOD.If they have optimistic point of view, whatever happens, they won`t give easily.
