Learn the Art of Listening
@chipesterkhan (2925)
Philippines
July 7, 2010 8:01pm CST
Sometimes people are just too smart for their own good.
Or maybe they would like to believe they are when in truth they are not.
In communication there is the sender and the receiver
usually we all end up concentrating more on sending than receiving
let's change that to talking and listening so that it'll be more clear to everyone
a lot of people fail to understand the power of listening
usually they do not practice this skill because they would want to dominate the discussion with words and words and words and words and words and words and words.... blah blah blah blah blah
and the only thing the other person's just gonna get is either a few of the truly meaningful words or they'd just think the talker is an idiot.
practice the art of listening. there is so much knowledge you will learn out of listening alone.
"light is faster than sound. that's why people appear bright when you first see them, until they start talking" haha something i read in buy and sell magazine
1 person likes this
14 responses
@chipesterkhan (2925)
• Philippines
8 Jul 10
wow i'm honored to be your first hehehehe
i see a (1) right beside your name so this is probably the first post
i hope you'll have a great time here on mylot
@consultrainer (4992)
• India
8 Jul 10
khan, you could have waited. for the other responses. i invite you to read the guidelines for marking best response.
however, if it is to encourage a newbie.. I welcome your decision.
and, DR.. congratulations on the BR.
dr: Digital Rapture. BR: best response.
1 person likes this
@basqui (3888)
• Philippines
8 Jul 10
Listening is a good gesture of saying you are respecting the talker. If the talker feels that he is respected then he will surely respect you once you are the one talking already. give and receive is a good way of living and not merely giving and not receiving only.
1 person likes this
@mynestegg (519)
• Philippines
9 Jul 10
In my line of work, I better be a good listener. Otherwise, I'll have a very irate customer on the other end demanding to speak with my supervisor. LOL. It is very effective though. Sometimes, when you are upset, when you feel that you have been wronged, just being listened to is enough to calm one down.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
8 Jul 10
chipesterkhan hi My son when he was in his teens taught me a lesson
that I never forgot. I was doing my check balancing and he came in to
tell me something. I listened but still my mind was half on my check
balancing. He looked at me, frowned, then grabbed my stuff and pushed it to one side.He said, MOm listen to me,quit fiddling with that stuff.You were not listening." And to be really fair I really was not giving him my full attention which was rude to start out with."So I then gave him my full attention and I was glad I had as I learned he needed some help which I could and did give to him.From then on when someone is talking to me I put aside anything I may be doing and devote myself to just listen.
We all do this at times, just listen with half our brain while thinking of what we are going to say, so no wonder so many times we have misunderstandings due to not totally listening to each other. 
1 person likes this
@chipesterkhan (2925)
• Philippines
8 Jul 10
yeah most of the young ones today are multitaskers and won't give us the full attention we need
and also some of the adults who were trained to be attentive have forgotten the art of listening just because they too are required to multi task just like your situation with your son and your check
i come from the old school
when someone talks... i stop and listen... i just might get something out of it
@magtibaygom (4858)
• Philippines
8 Jul 10
Reading your article above reminds me of Stephen Covey's Book "7 Habits of Highly Effective People". In one of the chapters there you will find "Seek first to understand, then to be understood". It teaches the value of listening. Good communicators are good listeners, just like the psychiatrist who cure his patient's emotional problem just by listening.
1 person likes this
@chipesterkhan (2925)
• Philippines
8 Jul 10
i used to be so confused over why i wanted to just listen instead of speak
i was a weird kid back then, all i did was observe people... listen not just with my ears but "listen" with my whole body. I observed how people walked, talked, acted etcetera... i would then try to include everything i learned in the mini comics i was making. quite crude but it was my form of expressing myself.
and then later on i was able to read stephen covey's book and i began to fully understand why i was able to capture a lot of things. because i listened.
and ever since then i was empowered with the knowledge that by listening i would be able to gain more.
thank you for bringing that topic up... wow... what a trip through memory lane
@amrddy (215)
• Philippines
9 Jul 10
You are right. Even in marriage it should be a give and take relationship. If one is on the warpath the other should stay out of his way. When a friend comes to you with her problems you should listen to what she has to say and then if she wants your advise then you can give it to her. Sometimes all we do is nag nag and nag. We don't give each other the opportunity to say what we want to say because both wants to be talker and not a listener. We should listen sometimes maybe we can get something out of it.
1 person likes this
@krajibg (11923)
• Guwahati, India
8 Jul 10
All is human. The common tendency is that people love more to send than receive specially in this field.
To be a better listener is not everyone's cup of tea. Since this is an art therefore we often get to hear people saying negatives about one who talks more and listens less.
Mere putting blame on others would not solve the problem. If we are really keen to develop this art of listening we need to spread it first by practicing this among ourselves.
what consultainer stated is correct. The TOS of Mylot has some thing else to add in selection of BR.
Anyway nice words.
@CJscott (4187)
• Portage La Prairie, Manitoba
8 Jul 10
Preaching to the choir friend, and while we are talking about listening improvement, why not test your skill...
http://www.speakingandlistening.com/quiz
By one of the best listening coaches in the World, John Milton Fogg.
Sincerely and With Appreciation.
1 person likes this
@laniekins (4579)
• Philippines
8 Jul 10
I can say that I am a good listener. I listen to my friends stories and what they are feeling more than talking nonsense words.
1 person likes this
@udaymohan (437)
• India
8 Jul 10
Only a good listener can be a good communicator. Speaking is an art but one becomes a good communicator only when he listens to others. Attentive listening means one is learning from others.
@ReadyWriter12 (124)
• United States
8 Jul 10
I agree, it is better to listen first and then respond. This process will eliminate assumptions and help you avoid bad situations.
@ksjayadev (12)
• India
8 Jul 10
In my opinion everybody should inculcate the habit or art of listening in their lives which is a very important habit in life. The person who does not have the habit of listening will miss many opportunities and chances to learn things in life. I give the most importance to art or habit of listening.
1 person likes this
