Is it wrong to fall in love again when you are 50 yrs old?

Malaysia
October 10, 2010 8:25am CST
Is it too old to fall in love at 50? I am very much a committed woman but only in papers. My marriage died a long time ago as my husband ditched me and my children for a younger chic. All these years I have isolated myself from social life as I have to look after the kids. Now that they have left the nest, I am lonely and met a nice guy online. I am lonely and he sounded 'good' to me. Though I have never met him personally but he is willing to come over to my country to meet me. Is it right or wrong to go ahead with this meeting?
8 people like this
34 responses
@Catana (735)
• United States
10 Oct 10
People fall in love and get married in their fifties, sixties, and seventies. There's nothing wrong with it. What is wrong is what you're about to do. This guy isn't your last chance, and you don't know anything about him except what's he's told you. The fact that he's willing to come to your country might mean that he's desperate to find someone himself. If so, why is he desperate? That would set off alarm bells for me. Or he may recognize that you're desperate and think he can take advantage of that. Also, if he's spent money and made a long trip to see you, and it doesn't work out, he may be angry and expect you to pay him back somehow. I think you would be getting yourself in a potentially dangerous position by seeing this man. If you want to meet someone, start getting yourself back into a social life so you can have a more realistic view of the men you meet.
5 people like this
• Malaysia
11 Oct 10
I agree with you. Much has been said about fakers online who are only taking chances to lure unsuspecting innocent people online. I am very much aware of that. But he sounded to be good to me after a long liaison with him online. I wouldn't discount the fact that he is also sailing in the same boat as me, and looking for someone to fill the void.
1 person likes this
@puccagirl (7306)
• Israel
10 Oct 10
Of course you should do it if you are not with your husband anymore. Age is just a number, and you should live your life to the fullest, no matter how old you are! Just be careful, since it is always a bit risky to meet someone you met online. Meet in a public place the first time etc.
3 people like this
• Malaysia
10 Oct 10
I have been told to be careful when I meet someone I met online. But if he comes to my country I think I have reasons not to be wary about him, right?
1 person likes this
@teamrose (1499)
• United States
11 Oct 10
Even if he comes here you still need to be extra cautious. Do you know where he works. What personal information do you have on him. No matter what country he's from, you can do a search to verify some information on him.
• Jamaica
10 Oct 10
50 is a good age to fall in love, You can grow old together, there is no one to fuss with, its all fun from there on i think thats the best thing for people of that age they are mature and has gone through the facts of life
3 people like this
• Malaysia
11 Oct 10
It is a 2nd chance in life but it doesn't mean that I would blindly accept the supposedly love he confessed to me. I have to see whether we are compatible or not. It will be another blow if I just blindly take him to be my so called soulmate.
@misheli (552)
• Philippines
10 Oct 10
I dont see any wrong falling in love again even if you're 50. If you think and feel that the guy is sincere then go ahead and let him go to your country. I think if a person is willing to travel that far just to see you I think he is serious about you.
3 people like this
• Malaysia
10 Oct 10
Lets see what happened. I am too nervous at this stage. But I will have few more months to decide.
1 person likes this
@ellie26 (4140)
• Malaysia
10 Oct 10
Age is only a number and love is blind. Combining these two words make it a good excuse to find love again. It is also up to you to decide whether you are willing to let yourself to love again. The most important thing what make you feel happy and content in your life...falling in love or life satisfaction?
3 people like this
• Malaysia
10 Oct 10
I agree....love is always blind and we only get our eyesight back when we sign on the dotted lines in the marriage cert.
1 person likes this
@kodukodu84 (1573)
• Malaysia
10 Oct 10
If you have the intention to go for the meeting then you need to plan it well. Age is not a problem. Just because we are 50 does not mean that we are not allowed to have that feeling again and especially to enjoy meeting someone we like. It is good to know he is also willing to some over to your country to meet up with you. Good luck and have a nice day
3 people like this
• Malaysia
10 Oct 10
Well at 50 I feel old but my heart says go for it. This might be my last chance to realize what love means.
1 person likes this
• India
11 Oct 10
Hello welcome to mylot I think you should proceed, there is nothing wrong in it, age is just a number, at 50 also you need a partner to share feelings, to take care of each other, only thing you have to adjust with him for some days initially, next things would be okey.. Thanks for sharing. Cheers. Professor. .
2 people like this
• Malaysia
15 Oct 10
Thanks Prof, you are a very openminded person and have a good advice here.
@johan143 (164)
• Philippines
11 Oct 10
It is not wrong to fall in love again but i find it hard to commit the same mistakes. I mean finding the wrong man again. After all the heartaches it brings, i find it traumatic to look for another man. For me, the love of my children are enough to compensate for the love my spouse did not give. Anyway, if you think your new love is sincere enough in his intention, go ahead... LOVE by all means. We will be happy for you.
2 people like this
• Malaysia
15 Oct 10
Thanks...love is giving my another chance to fill the void left by my husband.
@johan143 (164)
• Philippines
11 Oct 10
It is not wrong to fall in love again but its hard to commit the same mistakes.
• Malaysia
15 Oct 10
I wouldn't want to repeat history.
@mitzie13 (15)
• Philippines
11 Oct 10
It's not wrong to fall in love. Just be careful.
2 people like this
• Malaysia
15 Oct 10
will be careful.
@teamrose (1499)
• United States
11 Oct 10
It is absolutely not wrong to fall in love again at 50. After all 50 is the new 30. My only concern is with any internet romance, it is really hard to know anything about the person. Many ladies get fooled by online gigolos or men wanting to come to America and need a citizen to sponsor them. I don't know how you would run a check on a person out of the country, but you have to be verrrrry careful.
• United States
11 Oct 10
I don,t want to scare you or ruin the blossoming romance but be really careful with internat romance or friendship. There are too many opportunist out there waiting for a chance... but anyway good luck and may you have a happy life.
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
15 Oct 10
I should bear that in mind, internet people needs extra careful.
@foofermen (501)
10 Oct 10
Yes go for it lady! I hope it goes great for you! This trend of feeling forced to stay in a stagnant relationship needs to stop. It is, however, very important that you are safe for this visit. If you have friends or family that can be there for you to make sure you are okay, that would be wise. You could for example call or text them every couple hours to "check in." There have been horror stories based on this kind of relationship. Just be safe.
• Malaysia
11 Oct 10
The fear is always there but since he is coming in to my country, I have the ball in my courtyard. I am at the advantage on this meeting.
12 Oct 10
Very true. I hope it works out well for you. =)
@prinzcy (14296)
• Malaysia
13 Oct 10
Nope, there's no age limit to fall in love, especially when you're single and available. But from your story, he's willing to come to your country just to be with you? You can try to trust him but you do need to be cautious as well. True, love is blind. Therefore, why not ask for help? Ask for opinion from someone near you who could give a fair opinion about him. Good luck.
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
15 Oct 10
The feedback I get from this post have given enough of advices and inspiration to go ahead with the meeting.
@dodo19 (42596)
• Beaconsfield, Quebec
12 Oct 10
It's certainly not to old to fall in love. I don't think that you're ever too old to fall in love. If you get the chance, you should go for it. It's not something that I think you should let pass you by.
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
15 Oct 10
I am still young at heart.
• Philippines
11 Oct 10
There's nothing wrong with giving yourself another chance.It's nice to have somebody loving you especially in your golden years. Loving is ageless. You can be young or old it does not matter what is important is that you are happy with the person you are with .
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
15 Oct 10
What is there left but am looking only for companion in my old age.
@shaggin (56028)
• United States
11 Oct 10
If your husband left you many years ago your marriage is over and I dont see that as having to be commited to anyone. Consider yourself single and you can date whoever you want to. 50 is not to young to fall in love! Love can be at any age and its beautiful! I personally would date people locally for safety reasons I would never want someone to come from another country and meet me.
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
15 Oct 10
This is kind of crossing the cultural barrier and that might pose a challenge to me.
• India
11 Oct 10
Love has nothing to do with age. Your feeling of attraction to anybody is very natural as you have been lonely all these years. But you could always be extra cautious when you meet somebody in person. Be sure about the place you are meeting him for the fist few times is familiar one. Its always better to be in safer hands. You should defenitely meet him but being cautious is never harmful.
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
15 Oct 10
Safety is my first priority when meeting friends online.
• United States
11 Oct 10
Please don't stress yourself over this,because I feel that it is totally normal to want to love again at any age. I am only 36 but I know the feeling. Just don't rush into or fall for ANYTHING.I wish you all the happiness in the world.
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
15 Oct 10
Well, it is God's gift to everyone to live and love.
@mimiang (3768)
• Philippines
11 Oct 10
fallin in love is everyone's right whatever age they are
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
15 Oct 10
Love is ageless....
@tammytwo (4300)
• United States
11 Oct 10
You have raised your children and now it is time to take care of yourself. It is not wrong at all to want to meet someone new and move on with your personal life. Your children will be making lives for themselves and you will need someone to help occupy your time. Go ahead with the meeting and have a great time but don't FORCE yourself to fall on love with this one guy. There are plenty of "fish" in the sea and now you have time to find the perfect "catch".
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
15 Oct 10
I won't go out fishing anymore as I think I am a little old for that. Meeting is no commitment but only a good friendly meeting.