Concerned about my nephew's eating habits
@lindaharding627 (1442)
United States
December 31, 2010 9:45am CST
We had Christmas dinner at my mom's house the other night. I have an eleven year old nephew that was there. He has always been a picky eater and my sister is worried that he is malnourished. He is offered plenty of food but he doesn't want to eat. At my mom's all he ate was five dinner rolls. My sister is taking him to different doctors and trying to get him help. There are many days he will not eat anything. We feel that maybe he has an eating disorder. Many of the doctors are not taking her seriously and we are very frustrated.
1 person likes this
9 responses
@nayaz1625 (131)
• Mauritius
31 Dec 10
good to see a doctor but it is equally important for parent to talk to the child. be frank and speak about his eating habits and possible consequences. if nothing works try a psy, he should be able to talk to the child.
@lindaharding627 (1442)
• United States
31 Dec 10
He has been to a psy before. My sister remarried and his bio dad gave up his parenting rights, then he was adopted by her new husband. He has always taken his bio dad's rejection hard.
@nayaz1625 (131)
• Mauritius
1 Jan 11
ok i am sorry for that. I am no expert but in that case I think your sister has to be close to his son, giving lots of affection, talking a lot, keeping him happy etc. I am sure she must be doing all that and I hope gradually this will help. All the best.
@Fire10 (293)
• United States
2 Jan 11
I just ask because I've been about this same height since I was... probably about 14 years old... I'm at my all-time max weight and I am still 15 lbs below my 'ideal weight'. I exercise regularly, my BMI is in a healthy range (21), and all routine blood tests indicate that I am in superb health.
Anorexia is a serious issue - especially among the young - and there are things to watch out for - some physical and others not so physical. Although mental illness/disorders can be harder to find, doctors can very easily and adequately detect when eating less begins to affect his physical health.
So my advice: do what can be done on the mental health side of things (if you feel necessary), but in terms of his physical health there is - in the opinion of several trained professionals - no need to do anything about it. There may be justified concern for his behavior, but those habits have not yet become a threat to his physical health. If I was still concerned I'd have him step on a scale once a week so that I could watch his BMI... a normal BMI falls anywhere between 18.5 and 24.9 (a low BMI if it is below 18.5 and anorexic if below 17.5). http://www.nhlbisupport.com/bmi/
Again, it may be concerning but if his BMI is within normal limits, he has a healthy body image, and he has an active lifestyle, his physical health is probably in the top 5-10 percentile in the nation.
Hope this helps :)
@GardenGerty (157735)
• United States
1 Jan 11
I would not go from one doctor to another, because that just makes her look desperate. She needs to pick one doctor, and they need to be a team working together for her son's health. He needs a physical, more than just height and weight, but also blood tests to determine if he is getting the nutrition he needs. If he has energy and he sleeps well, and he continues to grow, he is okay. It is possible that he is using the food issue to get extra attention, or to prove that he is in control of something. It is not unusual for kids to decide to have strong feelings about certain foods. I would say that he should not have been allowed to eat five dinner rolls, and nothing else. I have worked in an environment with kids with food issues. With one young person there was almost nothing he would eat, but he would drink milk, and the things he did like he ate so quickly it would bring him close to throwing up. We made him wait a certain length of time between servings of milk and of the foods that he tended to gobble.
@macdingolinger (10386)
• United States
1 Jan 11
He was allowed to eat five rolls and nothing else? I'm sure that is because she was glad he was eating something at all it sounds like. But since he ate five of them - he can and does eat. It may be a disorder but it may need to be a retraining. I would certainly hope she gets him some help soon!
@natnickeep (2336)
• United States
31 Dec 10
Yes this can be serious with his age. If he was younger I would say not to worry so much. They tend to go through more growth spurts and eating habits change often. But by age 11 he should be eating regularly. My 10 year old daughter tries to eat more than me. She is not overweight..just a growing girl. Does he get much activity? Because if not he wouldn't want to eat as much. It may be more of an issue than just the food. Important thing is for her to keep searching for a good doctor. One who understands her and is willing to help. She might even want to look into a mental health physician and a dietitian. They could tackle the issue deeper. For now though..make sure he is taking vitamins or drinking vitamin shakes. Good luck girl. I hope your nephew gets the help he needs.
@lindaharding627 (1442)
• United States
31 Dec 10
My sister gets him boost shakes. He is very active but just doesn't want to eat. Even when he was a baby, my sister would take him to WIC appointments and they told her he is underweight. This has always been a struggle for my sister.
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
6 Jan 11
If you all think that your nephew may be suffering from an eating disorder, the proper kind of doctor to take him to would be a psychologist. However, it may not be that he has an eating disorder at all, it could simply be that he is that picky about the things that he eats. I've got a cousin that while we were growing up would never eat items that had more than a couple of ingredients. It was kind of funny to watch her eat Thanksgiving dinner because the only things that she would have on her plate were bread, lettuce and turkey (no gravy).
@peavey (16936)
• United States
31 Dec 10
Maybe if she told the doctor that she's afraid he has an obstruction or stomach problem, they'd take her more seriously. Not that I'm saying that he has one of those things, but it might give them something to look for and then they'd become interested in solving the problem. He can't be getting the right vitamins and minerals eating like that.
@marguicha (216097)
• Chile
31 Dec 10
I would not let a kid eat 5 diner rolls if he is not eating his food. A couple of years ago I invited my eldest daughter with her children for a special diner I made for the young ones. I had hotdogs, coke, sweets they liked. I worked a lot to have just about everything they most wanted. My youngest grandson got mad at me because I called for diner when he was playing. He had been playing all evening so he could stop. So he said he would not come and made an awful face. I said sweetly it was diner time, human beings were at the table, the dog was playing outside so he could choose to play with the dog (out) or to be with us (in). He came and sat down but told his mom he would not eat as he had a tummy ache. After that he grabbed the Coca cola bottle but I was quicker. I said that his tummy would hurt more if he drank that cold stuff, that I could give him a lukewarm tea, no sugar
. The tummy hurt disappeared. And now he respects me.
Most children that don´t eat just want to manipulate the grownups. Don´t let him.
Happy posting.
. The tummy hurt disappeared. And now he respects me.
Most children that don´t eat just want to manipulate the grownups. Don´t let him.
Happy posting. 
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
31 Dec 10
A doctor will determine if he is healthy by taking CBC blood tests. I would say a daily vitamin can help. Also appealing healthy foods that maybe he would like. I see from one of your responses that he had a hard time with his dad's separation.
If he is healthy let's pray he slowly re-gains interests to foods. Maybe next time the grocery shopping is done he can select a couple healthy items he maybe more apt to eat.
I wish him well linda as children are so impressionable. Many blessings for him on behalf.
