can you forgive

It depends on the circumstances. If the person was legally to blame, but it was an unfortunate accident, I could. If they were at fault, but it was a totally unintentional, careless thing, I could. But if it was malicious, if they were a chronic drunk driver, if they were trying to escape police, things like that, I 'd have a real hard time with it.

If I was the person that caused an accident like this, I don't think that I would ever be able to forgive myself for what had happened. However, if I was a person that lost a loved one because of a tragic accident like this, I think that I would be able to forgive the person that had caused the accident. The reason that I feel this way is because of the fact that I'm a very forgiving person. It wouldn't happen over night, but eventually I would be able to forgive the person.

Everything that happens to us, has become the will of God. However we escape, if all has been the will of God, we still can not escape. I will not blame anyone, with what had happened.

I think that even though you are not at fault....this is going to haunt you for the rest of your life, for lack of better words. My husband is a truck driver and we have heard stories over the years about people who wanted to end their lives.....so they walk out in front of a big rig. This is sooooo selfish, I feel. The person will undoubtedly end his life, but the truck driver will always know that he hit and killed a person. Some of these truck drivers never get in a truck again. So sad. I know counseling would be in my future....even if I wasn't to blame.....and if I was to blame---I can't even imagine.

Everyone can forgive so why not you. no matter how grave your mistakes was, its a matter of conscience and forgiveness that must dominate into yourself. Your father should admit what he had done in the past or else he will carry the guilt and the nightmare for the rest of his life. no offense.

heymdear savypat.to be frank,if i were you,i would blame myself all the time.on the contrary,i would help others who needed .becasue ,we would get happiness from it.Humen are guilty.Being yourself !

Wow!! Personally this would be a hard thing to have to live with, and I often wonder even though most people can move on and do other things with their life, how often they are brought back to thinking about this, and wonder what if things could have been different, and how has what happened effected their life from there? Being in an auto accident to where luckily no one was hurt is bad enough, and makes you glad of that.. but if it was someone killed, especially if it was a member of my family that I was close with, I am not sure what I would do. I know one thing though, with Prayer and help from the Lord I would move on and live life the Best I could.

I don't know how to answer this, savy. But if I was in your dad's place, I may have gone the same. Haunted and will be having a hard time making myself be forgiven. If I were the family member, as long as I know it's not the driver's fault. Maybe I can let it go but would somehow found myself in question to the higher power. I am very pessimistic and I still even have issues of my own which me doubtful of my faith towards Him, our God. So, it's really difficult to answer this most especially when we have different views to situations like this.

I dont think I would be able to forgive and forget if I was the only one surviving and accident. Nor would I forgive anyone for killing my loved ones. I have gone through the loss of loosing my husband in an accident and know how the pain and hatred is.

I can't say that I can forgive myself or other people that easily. Losing a love one or committing an accident both really hurts. But accident do happen every minute and every hour of the day. No one wants to be on the accident or you are the one who caused it. I guess if that happens you have to seek for medical help to get through it. Although it is never easy to just forget what had happened. And best of all is pray for it. That God would lightened your burdens and always seek for Him.

That's a tough one. I would probably feel guilt no matter what. Even if you know it's not your fault, you also know that there was a life taken. It would be very hard to not blame yourself a little. We are our toughest critics.

Honestly speaking, I don't know. It's already hard to forgive someone who, for example, had humiliated you in front of a lot of people. But forgiving someone who has killed a loved one of yours? I don't think I can. I envy the people who really had forgiven unconditionally a person who has done him wrong.

if i am wrong and mine fault. due to my fault some one injured or lose. then i will not forgive my self. if others fault then i don,t say any thing to him and forgive him. becoz punishing him i cant get any thing back that i have lose. it is just relaxsation of mind.

No, but I can forget blaming in the first place. The blame then exists in the explanations for the resulting conditions, and--after you change the conditions back enough to negate the incident's effect--you forget the fault!

No I could never forgive myself even if it was not my Fault I think if someone was driving and killed one of my Loved once it would depend on the Circumstances i.e. that the Driver had not been drunk or was under the Influence, it would take me a while I guess to tell myself it was not the Drivers fault if it was a genuine Accident but I think eventually yes I could

This is one of the reasons why I no longer drive. I am on asthma medication that sometimes leaves me feeling a little light headed and I do lose focus a lot of times. I cannot stand hurting someone even if it is unintentional. This one of the reasons why I hate driver in my country's public transportation who don't care about their passengers. In a lot of road mishaps here in my country, the driver always leaves the scene unscathed and you can see no remorse when asked about the accident.

Hi savypat, I know that I could forgive someone who killed a loved one like this, but if I were the cause of the accident, it would be much more difficult to forgive myself. Many people come down on themselves much more than they do others, and I really have to work at forgiving myself. Blessings.

If it were to happen to me I cannot assure myself that I can forgive easily but with God most definitely I can forgive at some point. Definitely things happen for a reason. There is a time and season for things thus we should make way for grieve and everything else then comes forgiveness. Yes it will be hard for the person who survived but then if it was not your fault you should most definitely forgive yourself.

Similar event happen to me, I may not forgive myself, and I would definitely blame myself for the rest of my life. I might not even be able to drive again too. Please their faces might haunted on my eyes, and on my face again. That is too terrible to think about even.

Hi savypat. So sorry to hear of your dad's experience. Could not imagine the emotional pain he carries. Your post reminded me of a personal experience long ago. This may not answer your post but I could not help thinking of a friend and co-worker who gave up his life in a car accident to save another. We were at a party and he took us - ladies - home first. He was to drop the last passenger when his car skided (it just rained so the road was slippery) and sure to hit a concrete wall. He swerved to the left saving his passenger. He did not survive the crash. He was young and promising. He topped a national engineering board exam. Just wanted to share this heroic feat. Thanks for your post, gave me an opportunity to share this driver's experience.