How expensive is the marriage in your country?
By devijay78
@devijay78 (1573)
India
February 18, 2011 2:00am CST
Marriages are an extravagant, costly and colourful affair in India. And a normal middle class person might have to spend anything from Rs 5,00,000($11,111) to rs. 10,00,000($22,222) for one person's marriage. And mostly it is the bride's parents who bear the expenses including the jewellery and other expenses. Phew! For many it is their life long savings. And imagine their plight if they have more than one daughter!
That is why most of them prefer to have boys instead of girls.
For a normal middle class family, you need to invite at least 500 people for the marriage and reception. If the parents are working and the bride and groom are also working, then it is hell. There would be more than 1000 guests and managing them would be very very difficult. And no one can talk about the weddings of celebrities. They are sickeningly expensive and I read in the paper that for one celebrity's wedding, the guests were given pearl sets and gold figurines. Don't know how much of it was true.
As for me, now I know that I would have preferred a small wedding with only my near and dear ones. But there is the status of the parents to be adhered to and that is the culprit.
How are the marriages in other places?
That is why most of them prefer to have boys instead of girls.
For a normal middle class family, you need to invite at least 500 people for the marriage and reception. If the parents are working and the bride and groom are also working, then it is hell. There would be more than 1000 guests and managing them would be very very difficult. And no one can talk about the weddings of celebrities. They are sickeningly expensive and I read in the paper that for one celebrity's wedding, the guests were given pearl sets and gold figurines. Don't know how much of it was true.
As for me, now I know that I would have preferred a small wedding with only my near and dear ones. But there is the status of the parents to be adhered to and that is the culprit.
How are the marriages in other places?3 people like this
8 responses
@CTHanum (8234)
• Malaysia
19 Feb 11
hi devi!
Yes, in my country that price is an average price for someone to get married.For me that is a big price to pay just to get married.As far as I know the basic price is not that much at all but because the things/dowry, they are getting high and higher.And because of that one should have more money to make sure everything is fine when the big day is coming. Instead of that why can't they have a simple ceremony and not waste their money for the big one?I wonder why~
@CTHanum (8234)
• Malaysia
21 Feb 11
Worst case is there are some people who owed money just want to get married. They start their marriage life with debt and debt. Once they have children the debt will getting bigger and how could they have a happy life if they struggle to settle the debt that rise year after year?
@devijay78 (1573)
• India
24 Feb 11
Sorry for the late response. I have been busy with my scans, blood tests and visting the doctor with the reports. What you say is true. Most of them start their life with debt and find it difficult to repay the loans. But in my country, it is the parents who bear the marriage expenses and so mostly the couple are free to start their life without any problems. Things are changing nowadays and working women as well as men do share in the expenses of their parents. It might not be much but it will definitely be a welcome gesture and the parents would be grateful for any help from their kids.
@devijay78 (1573)
• India
20 Feb 11
Hi CTHanum. It irks me when I think of the total waste of money. I do agree with you. In fact, my parents are thinking now that they should have opted for a simple wedding. But then, the situation was different. Still, spending so much just to get married is ridiculous. Most of them here save for the big day all their lives and blow it up in just two days the marriage is held. My husband neither demanded dowry nor did he insist on knowing how much jewels my parents were giving me. But I know that never happens in others' cases. I really pity those people who are forced to give much money and jewellery as dowry.
But, if I get success I prefer to invite the poorest and or orphant to celebrate it together.@devijay78 (1573)
• India
19 Feb 11
Oh, if only so much was spent on marriages here! But people don't think much about the expenses. They need to show off and earn the respect of others and that depends on how well and how big the wedding was. Anything less than 11,000 dollars would be considered very much below average.
@devijay78 (1573)
• India
20 Feb 11
That is a very smart move Devilova. Wish people do use their money usefully than wasting it on occasions like this.
@Porcospino (31366)
• Denmark
18 Feb 11
My husband and I had a relatively small wedding with our closest relatives and our closest friends (around 50 people) and the price was about $8000. After the ceremony in the church we had coffee and wedding cake at a cafe, and in the evening we had dinner at a Chinese restaurant.
My husband and I paid for the dinner and my parents paid for the coffee and the wedding cake. In many cases the Danish couples who get married pay for everything themselves, and it is not a tradition that the parents have to pay, but my parents offered to pay for some of it as a present. My wedding dress cost around $1500, but some wedding dresses in my country are much more expensive. The very cheapest option is a wedding dress bought from a second hand shop (around $20)
@devijay78 (1573)
• India
20 Feb 11
Oh! Feeding 50 people costs $8000? But it is actually good that you had a small wedding. My reception alone had more than 1000 people and we had a hard time standing and smiling and trying to remember who was who. Those four hours were hell and it showed in the form of back and leg pain. And for the wedding we had about 400 to 500 guests. This is actually a filtered guest list. If we had thought of inviting every one my parents and myself and my husband's parents and himself knew, well, I don't know how much it would have come to.
Here, you cannot buy second hand clothes for a wedding. Even the poorest person would have to spend for new clothes even if they are cheap. But they should be new. It is considered auspicious.
@monty21 (119)
• India
18 Feb 11
In India, marriages are really costly affair. As i am Indian also, but i don't like this extravagant. The reason is a lot of money is spend on it. Unlike India, Marriages are quite cheap in foreign country in terms of spending money. I mean to say that we can save money for our future instead of wasting money on marriage. I am not saying that marriages don't have value in India. Only India is a country where people more value to marriages. But spending the money more than requirements is wrong thing. We should only invite some close relatives, and friends. Apart from it, we should spend the money on hi- tech food. In turn, we should provide guests simple vegetarian food.
@devijay78 (1573)
• India
19 Feb 11
Hi monty. Welcome to mylot. I wish I had a simple wedding instead of an extravagant one. But then, it was my parents' decision and I could do nothing about it. But left to me, I would have had a very simple wedding with close relatives and friends and used the rest of the money as a down payment for buying a house of my own. Well, I just hope my kid would be more sensible and choose wisely. And most of the weddings serve only vegetarian food. But that is costly too. With lots of varieties to be served, it becomes expensive.
@changjiangzhibin89 (16534)
• China
18 Feb 11
On the contrary,here the side of groom mainly bears the wedding costs in general.The expense of the marriage is steadily on the increase.For the sake of what is called face ,people not so much as considering their income,come in mutual comparisons.
@devijay78 (1573)
• India
18 Feb 11
Here the groom's parents might or might not get the bride jewellery. But they do get her one or two sarees. But it is a pittance compared to how much the bride's parents spend and will nowhere come near it. Yes, it is a shame that the marriage expenses are steadily on the increase. The same happen here too. With utter disregard to their incomes or forethought some people spend too lavishly and regret later.
@drinylane (117)
• Philippines
18 Feb 11
Here in the Philippines, the bride and the groom usually share the expenses unless their parents are rich. for a middle calls couple, an extravagant weeding could only cost $4,000 to $6,000.
@devijay78 (1573)
• India
19 Feb 11
Hi drinylane. Welcome to mylot. I guess I should have gotten married in Philippines.
It would have saved my parents' money so much! And so lucky that both the sides share the expenses. Here in most marriages, the bride's side has to bear all the expenses for the marriage and for some functions even after marriage. That is why most of them prefer a boy baby to a girl child.
It would have saved my parents' money so much! And so lucky that both the sides share the expenses. Here in most marriages, the bride's side has to bear all the expenses for the marriage and for some functions even after marriage. That is why most of them prefer a boy baby to a girl child.
@EdnaReyes (2622)
• Philippines
18 Feb 11
If one has plan of getting married, here in our place, you have to prepare at least A hundred thousand pesos. That's includes only the reception and not for the clothes of the whole wedding entourage . If you want to make a memorable wedding, a garden wedding will cost almost your lifetime savings. This is really the real cost of getting married in our place. And this is the reasons why many young lovers prefer to living-in relationship and being tolerated by parents because of high cost of wedding expenses!
@devijay78 (1573)
• India
18 Feb 11
Tell me about it Edna. This is so sickening. And one has to save for their entire lives to get one person married. Just imagine if they have more than one kid. And here, most of the time, the marriage expenses are borne only by the parents. If the couple are working, they might pitch in. But as the girl's parents are the ones to pay for the wedding and all other expenses, it will be helpful only if the bride had some savings from her salary all those years. If she had not saved or was not working, then heaven help the parents!
@NoWayRo (1061)
• Romania
18 Feb 11
Weddings over here are not so large - one with 500 guests would be considered quite big, one with 150-200 people is quite common.
The tradition here is that all guests make a small gift to the newlyweds. The gift has to be at the very least enough to cover the restaurant menu, but people usually give a little more, so in the end all expenses get paid from those gifts. Because of this custom, it's quite common for the bride and groom to take a bank loan six months before the wedding. The banks here approve such loans without hesitation, because they know they'll get their money back immediately after the wedding.
If a guest still wants to attend but cannot afford this gift, then it's ok to come just to the church ceremony, but not to the restaurant.
@devijay78 (1573)
• India
18 Feb 11
Hi NoWayRo. Here, most of the time, it is big, lavish spending for the weddings. People save their whole life for the money to be blown in just two days! People give gifts here too. It will either be a small amount of money(whatever they can afford), or some useful items which the couple can use when setting up their house, gold jewellery or coins and even silver items. But even then, all the gifts put together would not cost even 20% of what they spend. Sigh! That is India for you.
The banks do give loans but to the parents and not the couple. I guess the couple can only take loans depending on how much salary they get or how much they are worth.
