Graduation gifts...
@shaggin (74988)
United States
June 11, 2011 3:10pm CST
I have a graduation party to go to tomorrow. It is a two person graduation party. The two people are cousins.
The girl is my husbands cousins ex husbands daughter. I havent seen her in about 5 years.
The boy is my husbands nephew.
I feel that because the boy is closer related and I know him more that I should give him more money then the girl. But then I think it might be rude to put more money in one card then in the other. I could give the boy $20 and the girl $10. It would save me $10. I have another graduation party to go to in July so saving $10 would be nice. I dont know what I should do.
I never got a formal invitation in the mail from any of them. The mother and father both called me about the boys party and then the girl just sent me an invite to her party on facebook. If it wasent for the fact that I would already be at the boys graduation party that the girl is having her party at the same time and place I wouldnt be going to the girls graduation party. Because I will obviously be there for the boys graduation party and the girl sent me a facebook invite to the party I cant go and not give her anything.
1 person likes this
6 responses
@bounce58 (17380)
• Canada
17 Jun 11
First off, I think that any amount would do. It's a gift, and it is unexpected, so they should appreciate any amount.
And I think they should appreciate your situation, and having the thought to give them monetary gifts.
I haven't read through all the responses here, but what did you end up doing?
@shaggin (74988)
• United States
17 Jun 11
I wound up giving my husbands nephew $20 in the card and $10 in the girls card. I got invited to my husbands cousins grad party which was just a facebook invite like two days before the party and I dont know him at all so I didnt go. I have another graduation party to go to that is my husbands step brothers party. That party is a combined party with his cousin as well but I will not be giving any money to anyone but my husbands step brother as I dont know the other kids at all. The year that my daughter will graduate from high school she has four cousins in her grade as well that is going to be one big graduation party. I think I might want to do hers seperate from everyone else. I dont like them all having to share their party with their cousins. I had cousins in my grade as well but we all had seperate graduation parties.
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
14 Jun 11
If it was me, I would go and see what I would be able to find at the store to give to them. The reason for that is that I am often able to find gifts at the store on clearance that are a lot more valuable than what I would be able to give someone monitarily. For example, most people that are graduating are going to be going off to college, so one of the gifts that I remember the most that I got when I graduated high school was a sandwich maker. Those are often on clearance for as much as five dollars, but a recipient never knows how much you spent on a gift.
1 person likes this
@shaggin (74988)
• United States
15 Jun 11
Thats a really neat idea. My mother always gives gifts that she gets on sale such as mugs with graduation slogans on them or things like that. I feel stupid giving presents like that. I'm sure the graduates would rather have money so thats what I give them. But your idea is pretty neat. If I know they are going off to college and going to be staying in a dorm your idea would be great.
@ladym33 (10978)
• United States
12 Jun 11
If you are closer to the boy then I think it is OK to give him more. Hopefully the two of them will not compare what they received, but even if they do, it sounds like you never really see the girl anyways and are not likely too until her wedding, so I would not really worry about it. We had a double graduation last week too. These were both fairly close relatives. We gave them $20 each we usually would have given more but as of July 1st my husband will no longer have a job in two weeks so we have to save money right now. I feel bad I only gave them $20 though because I know I gave one of their sister's more a couple of years ago, but hopefully they will understand our financial situation.
1 person likes this
@shaggin (74988)
• United States
12 Jun 11
I figure hopefully they wont compare how much each gave them either so I just gave the boy more like I wanted to. I am sorry to hear that your husband lost his job. That is a scary situation especially right now with the economy being so bad and jobs being so hard to come by. I hope things improve for you financially soon!
@Nadinest1 (2016)
• Canada
12 Jun 11
I am such a chicken about these type of situations....I wouldn't even go.
""my husbands cousins ex husbands daughter"" wouldn't need to get anything....and since she just invited you on FB, she probably invited everyone on her friend's list to come and bring something to her party. So, don't feel special.
The nephew....take him your present or whatever to him the next day. You have kids right, tell him one/both of them weren't feeling well, so you could make it.
Man, I am just waking up...maybe in a bad mood it sounds.
1 person likes this
@marapplestiffy (2182)
• Philippines
11 Jun 11
hmmn, do what feels right for you...if your a bit closer to the boy then by all means give him more, you don't have to flaunt the difference when you give it to them, right? I mean it's inside the card, so no one will know...
@shaggin (74988)
• United States
11 Jun 11
That is very true I wont be coming out and telling anyone how much I gave each one but I'm worried that they will ask each other how much certain people gave them and then the girl will feel slighted. I feel like since her parents didnt invite me and she just sent me a invite on facebook that its like shes just doing it for the money since she knows I will be there already for her cousins party. But then again its not her fault that my husbands cousin and her father got divorced and I'm not close to her.
@marapplestiffy (2182)
• Philippines
11 Jun 11
well they might do that, and the girl might feel slighted, but you wont be seeing her that much anyway
Am I being mean? Nah, it's the fact of life...I'm sure that someone is close to her and would give her more than that is given to her couz too...
BUT the decision is up to you though...just do what you want
Am I being mean? Nah, it's the fact of life...I'm sure that someone is close to her and would give her more than that is given to her couz too...
BUT the decision is up to you though...just do what you want1 person likes this
