am i paranoid? or picked on?
@chicksdigscars (5483)
July 20, 2011 9:10am CST
i'm getting the distinct impression i'm being picked on. i have a feeling someone doesn't like me, for some strange reason, and that i have offended this person obviously in a former life, as they are not in my current one.. so no matter what i say, or do, or talk about.. there always seems to be some curt, dry, quite.. blunt.. little remark made. and to be honest it's starting to tick me off. they seem to have a problem with things i talk about, and topics i enjoy, and are constantly making me feel belitted, talked down to, and quite uneasy and uncomfortable. surely one human being shouldn't be allowed to do this to another. should i just tell this person that their scintillatingly boring conversations, spoken as though better than everyone else, is minddumbing and does not make them any better a person than me? do people not realise in this day in age that different cultures and different socities, offer people with different approaches to life?! different ways to speak, think.. different phrases and senses of humour? does that make me a less of a person because i don't fall into their clearly warped sense of cookie cutter people? .. not amused.
3 people like this
10 responses
@Orson_Kart (8261)
• United Kingdom
20 Jul 11
If it's a bloke, then a reckon he either feels threatened by you or fancies you. If it's a woman, then I reckon she either feels threatened by you or fancies you.
That's what I think! :)
1 person likes this
@Orson_Kart (8261)
• United Kingdom
21 Jul 11
Two of them? How shocking is that!
I think it makes it doubly worse if they are together as I can imagine them planning there nastiness towards you for the next day over supper.
Best thing you can ever do at a job where you are not appreciated or abused is to leave. Life is too short to put up with that crap and I am sure you'd walk straight into my arms. I mean straight into another job right away. :P
The 3rd Wheel? hmmmmmm ;)
@chicksdigscars (5483)
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21 Jul 11
aha! i like your thinking :) .. but i doubt either is true. the two that pick on me are actually together lol! unless they are looking a 3rd wheel? hmmm ;) lol!
@scorpiobabes (7225)
• United States
21 Jul 11
Are you talking about this happening in person, or online?
I went through this the last couple of years, but last year was the final straw and I walked away. I dropped a group of friends (NOT!) that took pleasure in torturing me. After two or three years, I had had enough, and began culling out those who were just an emotional drag. I also moved when the opportunity arose, and I haven't looked back. Best of luck--it's often THEIR problem, not yours.
@scorpiobabes (7225)
• United States
22 Jul 11
That's the attitude! That you love who you are and love your life is half the battle--so many people take something that hurt them as a child and carry it into adulthood. All they need to do is remove themselves from that hurt (it's like picking at a scab and never letting it heal) to begin to move on and above that.
I don't see them at all, except on Facebook. We do have mutual friends, so I still see their comments, but why deny myself the friends we share that didn't hurt me? And I moved because of love, so I came out the ultimate winner in the end.
@chicksdigscars (5483)
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22 Jul 11
oh so you actually moved etc? wow that was a big step to cut idiots from your life. i think you should be very very proud of yourself!
@chicksdigscars (5483)
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21 Jul 11
its happening in real life. i guess you're right, it is their problem at the end of the day, not mine. i love my life and who i am..and i need to be strong. do you never bump into them at all?
@samafayla33 (1856)
• United States
21 Jul 11
number one, :) not dumb! Your speech in verbage says that you are very intelligent and whoever is doing this to you sounds like they have the problem not you. Whoever has the tenacity to make you feel belittled is the one that feels poorly about themselves. This person is no better than anyone else clearly and they are only punishing themselves by making you feel bad.
@samafayla33 (1856)
• United States
21 Jul 11
you can't let people get to you, but it's easy, and it's not a perfect world. It seems like everyone for themselves these days. Know your family loves you and other's opinions suck.
@chicksdigscars (5483)
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21 Jul 11
thank you very much. it's nice to hear someone say that i seem intelligent by the way i speak, well type lol! .. i guess they could have their own insecurities, but i actually think they have anger issues if i'm honest. they just aren't a very nice person!
@webgirl01 (689)
• United States
21 Jul 11
Hey there, I think i feel the same way you do. I do feel people like to gossip me for some reason or give me the weirdest stare/glare. I hate it too. But i try not to be too judgemental on the persons i'm paranoid at. It's hard. I usually would cry if people stare and glare or say some whispery gossip while they are behind me. You can try going up to the person and saying hi what's up and be nice to them? Let see whats their reaction. I did that too, if I paranoid with gossipy people or people giving me weird looks, I just say hi and what's up and pretend not to worry anything. But then, we shouldn't mind if people say stuff about us or if they give us weird looks and stuff. Just go look forward or look to the grown or look the other side..lol.
@chicksdigscars (5483)
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21 Jul 11
i've tried to talk to them and engage them in conversation, but no luck. they are one of those people that are only happy when they are talking about themselves and better than everyone else. for example. he got a new car, and my daddy had bought the better version of the car a week before, and instead of just saying oh ok, because he was jealous, he started making fun of me because i couldn't drive!! .. i think after all these good comments i've the strength just to ignore him, atleast for awhile longer!! :)
@AgentGulaman (3546)
• Philippines
20 Jul 11
Just avoid them and don't think about them anymore. They are negative vibrations that need to be purged out of your system. Being affected by it makes gives them clear victory over you and you don't want that. Just express yourself, at least you have exercised your right to express it even though if they disagree. I think you should just let your emotions get into you for only a few minutes, after that move on. Prolonging the negative emotions in my opinion is alread self inflicted pain in your part. Just live life and don't get caught on by such people.
@chicksdigscars (5483)
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20 Jul 11
yeah i like your way of thinking! i dont want them to know they affect me.. it would actually be a better punishment for them if i act like they dont affect ,e?
1 person likes this
@AgentGulaman (3546)
• Philippines
21 Jul 11
Yes, being insensitive or not affected by such people is a very good counter for what they are trying to accomplish on you. When they see that you are not caught up with what they are doing, they will have a crazy time trying to look for other things to do for you to get affected. This will mess them up pretty nicely while you are living your life to the fullest. They are no lifers that they are not worth your concern. Good luck on dealing with them then!
@posting4cash (1)
• Egypt
21 Jul 11
i guess some people are just so insecure that they have to make everyone around them feel like crap..its actually sad because all they're doing is making everyone hate them ..
@chicksdigscars (5483)
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21 Jul 11
exactly! i used to really like him, now he makes my skin crawl. i suppose it'll be him laughing on the other side of his face when he eventually has no one to talk to, let alone make fun of!
@scorpiobabes (7225)
• United States
21 Jul 11
This woman I considered my best friend (?!?!) used to stand by while her husband, his cousin, and others within the group we socialized with liked to tease me. Once I had had enough of their childish behavior, I dropped them from my life--including her.
@mommyboo (13174)
• United States
21 Jul 11
Is this person your superior or your equal? If it's just a coworker (on even ground) or an acquaintance or friend of a friend, you have every right to confront them and ask them what their issue is. Either way, there is no reason someone should act that way without a reason - and you deserve to know what the reason is.
Of course, it may be that they don't even REALIZE they are coming across that way, though most of the time when someone is acting like this, they do indeed know what they are doing and are likely doing it on purpose - passive aggressive - because they don't have the nerve to TELL you about it!
@chicksdigscars (5483)
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21 Jul 11
they are above me in work. which is what makes it so hard, they are also 14 years older than me too, so i feel a little intimated. i know they wouldn;t sack me or anything, but thats because i keep my mouth shut and let them get on with it. i'm scared to make them aware of what they are doing on the offchance i loose my job. i know it would be unfair dismissal but i'm sure they could find something, lateness or something.
@salonga (27775)
• Philippines
21 Jul 11
Well dear if they do have problem with just about every thing about you then don't make a problem out of their attitude toward you. Why mind them? If they don't like you then let them die for hating you. I suppose there are also those who do not do the same. You better just enjoy the good people around instead of minding the nasty ones. If they are picking on you don't make them instruments to make you a paranoid person you don't really like to be.
@chicksdigscars (5483)
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21 Jul 11
thats what i've been trying to do, just ignore it. i don't want their nastiness and obvious insecurities make me paranoid about the person that i am, because i love me :) i love who i am. i think the high road is def the best road to take! thankyou!
@dsailor (44)
• United States
21 Jul 11
Personally i would just tell the person how you feel and to stop. Don't let it prey on your mind though cause it will actually start to affect your attitude, work and social life if you let it. Live your life how you like no matter what other people say or how they cut you down, be your own individual and not what others expect you to be. good luck
@chicksdigscars (5483)
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21 Jul 11
thanks! i had thought about telling them, but i've decided to keep a diary of each and everytime they treat me like this, and when it gets too much and too far, i will take out the diary and ask for a meeting with them and my line manager and that way i will somewhat have proof and not just look like i'm having a tantrum! lol!
@diala84 (138)
• United States
20 Jul 11
The unfortunate truth is that there will always be bullies because of upbringing and our human nature. Our negative behaviors are ones that have helped us to cope in society. Some people disconnect and give more meaning to their existence by belittling other and some are able to cope in other more productive ways. We do all we can to protect ourselves and gain access to better resources. We are competing for food, shelter, companionship, love, money, prestige, etc.. We all have different methods to obtain these goals but some include being mean to others with the intention of boosting ones chances. It is sad but as humans we are still little more than animals in this respect.
You are the better person for accepting others as they are and striving to be different. For the most part bullies are bullies and they will not change with a few words exchanged, they have to want to change. In my opinion it is best not to associate with people that put you down or are using you without any give and take.
@chicksdigscars (5483)
•
20 Jul 11
see to be honest? i hadn't really seen them as bullies. and i guess you're right. thats what they are.. bullies. and they won't stop until they see they have done you damage. well i'm not going to let them see, ever. they've seen enough of me getting worried and upset over them.. i can't be bothered anymore. 24 years of age being picked on by someone whos over 40.. thats wrong on so many levels!!
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