a big age difference matters for a relationship?
By janebernal
@janebernal (274)
Philippines
July 27, 2011 11:36am CST
as they say age doesnt matter when you fall in love..what matters most is what you feel to each other.When i first fall in love to my ex husband I choose him among my suitors because he is the only one who is much older. He is older than me by 7 years.I choose him coz with all my belief that he is matured and nevertheless responsible and lastly he will be faithful but then i was wrong as we separated.Now I told myself Im still going to settle to a person much older than me at least 15 years or more.Im a person that im attracted to an older man specially brainy and very professional, responsible and loving.What do you think is big age gap matters in a relationship or a reasons why it failed ?
2 people like this
21 responses
@jaiho2009 (39142)
• Philippines
27 Jul 11
I don't think age matter in a relationship.
I have a friend where the woman is 15 yrs older than her husband and they are happily married till now.
They only have one kid and both are happy.
So,i never think/believed that age does matter when it comes to loving someone or having a good and lasting relationship.
Some people who are old are still immature compared to young ones.
I don't care if I will fall in love to a guy who is 20 years old older than me.
have a good day 
jaiho®
jaiho®
@soulist (2985)
• United States
27 Jul 11
I have never thought of age as a factor in a relationship. Its about the couple and how they interact and respond to each other. No one is the same. Ive dated all eanges, a man younger than me, a few older, and some my age. It hust depends on the couple whether or not the relationship would fail or succeed not their age.
1 person likes this
@jaiho2009 (39142)
• Philippines
27 Jul 11
that's what I've wrote aint?
age is not a matter when it comes to love.....
kindly read my post please
jaiho®
jaiho® 
@mods196621 (3652)
• Philippines
27 Jul 11
That is what almost all women likes to [choose when it comes to relationship because we want matured men and responsible. But there we are fall to our expectations. They are the first to be unfaithful and cheated us, irresponsible and many things we do not expect they can do. I am also with a husband which is much older than me with a little differences he is 4 yers older than me and with the same speculation i prefer him. Well we are still with each other and he loves me so much [but there are many things that he cant do as head of the family and sad to say he is very weak when it comes to decision making. I am always the one who are the final go. And that weakens me at all. I feel tired thinking hows the family go on. I only want is to depend on him and try to have a little freedom. But here it is i cant do this thing... Anyway he loves me and try to understand me in all sides of being me. The only thing that he can;t do is to live without me at his side. But it bear a problem with me coz i hate such kind of attitude i want to a man is non stop thinking and looking to how he improve his financial income for the needs of his family. We are both working.
@mitchikoy0305 (88)
• Philippines
28 Jul 11
We have the same situation, my husband is ten years older than me. We both have our differences especially in our of point of views and principles. He grew up in Iloilo and lived a simple life like everyone does there. He was transferred to his uncles' place in Florida, Pampanga where I met him when he was introduced by a common friend. At first, In haven't thought of any problem with him, though we're not in the same level of education because I graduated from college while he was not. He's an introvert person and seldom talks and tell stories like the most men I met and knew for a long time. We got married after one year six months of being steady.And from then on, I discovered some attitudes that I don't want to elaborate but I felt disgusted. Eventhough he has a work of his own, I shoulder all the bills, milk of my son, my allowance and even the house rent. He was just paying for the food that we eat everyday. Until such time, that my kids turns three now. He hasn't changed or even bother to fro another high paying job or a sideline for me to lessen what I'm paying for just because of the reason that we want to stay good at their place because they have a 2-hectare rice field and a 200 sq. mtr. lot just for us if we decided to stay for good there. I don't want to live there because my work is here in Manila. Until last February this year, I decided to split with him eventhough we're married. It's hard for me to explain to my kids our situation. I'll just let my kids asked if they noticed that we're not together in due time.. But for now, I'm still striving hard to find ways on how raise them well. And hope that GOD will guide to my plans and settle the future of kids..
God bless you
@maximax8 (31053)
• United Kingdom
27 Jul 11
I don't think that age matters all that much. The couple should be compatible and get on well together. I know that a man can be older than a lady and people will accept this. However if the man is very much younger than the lady then people will find this strange. I am in my late thirties and so a man up to 15 years older than me or up to 5 years younger than me would be normal. There are different reasons why a relationship can fail and I don't think it is often about age.
@mods196621 (3652)
• Philippines
27 Jul 11
You are absolutely right maxima i agree to you.. it is not because of age why the couple is not successful or successful.
@jpso138 (7851)
• Philippines
1 Aug 11
Considering the age gap, there are reasons that the relationship might fail. But this does not mean that it will always feel. From what I notice, for a relationship to succeed, understanding, adjustment as well as love should be there. By having these, then there is no doubt that the relationship will prosper no matter what gap there is.
@Shankerj (241)
• India
28 Jul 11
I believe smaller age difference is good for a relationship, but when this difference is very big, it may lead to generation gap,
Generation gap : yes it can be a topic in itself.
I have heard that when you are in love this difference do not matter,
but really I have not seen any example for the same.
@bipolarbear (59)
•
28 Jul 11
no, the important is you're both happy and you love each other. the reason why it fails maybe because there are some people who strongly against it, (like some disagree that this person is not right for you because he is just like your father or older to be your father or grandfather), some have are problems with family acceptance and some have problems with incompatibility. but age-gap relationships nowadays are common and a lot of people started to accept it but i think it depends on their culture and their up-bringing.
@princess8881 (1630)
• South Korea
28 Jul 11
Age are just numbers its in the spirit..I am married too..to a man who is seven years older than me.. and yes sometimes even though he is older than me I feel like I am more mature than him.. I love him for what he is and not because of his age :)
@SIMPLYD (90722)
• Philippines
28 Jul 11
A big age difference, specially if the man is older isn't indicative that a relationship will be for keeps or your man will be faithful to you. It really depends on the both of you, how you treat and care for each other .
Sometimes, our men tend to cheat not because they want to, but because they cannot control themselves anymore from the temptation of women who even if they know that the man is married will still go after him. It's up to us to give them a chance of recovery should they fall for women of that kind.
Age doesn't really matter in a relationship.
@nurseclare (2209)
• Philippines
28 Jul 11
Age does not matter as long as you love each other, as long as their is God in your relationship. Just keep on praying, praying can make miracle things happen. i wish you all the best in life. :)
@Blueguy999 (352)
• India
28 Jul 11
It varies person to person.But most of the females get attracted to matured men when they themselves are enough matured to understand whats good and whats not good for them.I know many men who got married to older ladies and they are as happy as one ideal family can be.I myself get attracted to older females easily online though because they do response and understand and more clear of what they are doing..Normally it is said and common in society that the man should be older than the lady.That is from olden times when females are not that free and dependent on male in a family..but nowadays world has change.So the successful relationship has nothing to do with age gap as long as there is no health related problem comes specially to complete a family.
@Blueguy999 (352)
• India
28 Jul 11
It varies person to person.But most of the females get attracted to matured men when they themselves are enough matured to understand whats good and whats not good for them.I know many men who got married to older ladies and they are as happy as one ideal family can be.I myself get attracted to older females easily online though because they do response and understand and more clear of what they are doing..Normally it is said and common in society that the man should be older than the lady.That is from olden times when females are not that free and dependent on male in a family..but nowadays world has change.So the successful relationship has nothing to do with age gap as long as there is no health related problem comes specially to complete a family.
@flowerfest08 (1677)
•
28 Jul 11
In girls I think falling in love with older man is much better because they already have matured thinking, but I'm also not sure because they said more matured man are more wiser and more polygamous, maybe it depends on the person, he can be old in age but immature, but he can be younger than you are but more matured in thinking.
@dodo19 (47120)
• Beaconsfield, Quebec
27 Jul 11
Honestly, I don't think that age really matters. So long as there's love, trust, and such, then it can work out. My friend's parents have an 11-year age gap between them, and they've been together for I don't know how long, and they seem very happy. However, I don't think that age might have been the major reason why people split up. I don't think that the 7-years between you was the contributing factor to your split. I'm not trying to assume anything, or anything like that, as I don't know you or your ex well enough to make this sort of judgment for sure, but it's just a thought.
@dabangladehi (660)
• Bangladesh
27 Jul 11
No, I do not think so.My partner is 4 years junior than me.We are not facing any problem to continue our relationship.Its depend on understanding and self respect.You have to share every thing to your partner.Age different is not the fact.Mentality is the fact to maintain a sound relationship.You have to be faithful to your partner and should have respect to each other.
Do not look for age gap,look for a person who loves you,thinks about you and respect you and about ideas and share everything to you.Age is not a barrier for a relation.
Hope you will get a great life partner and do not think about past,look forward for future.
@pbbbsra (1214)
• Philippines
27 Jul 11
No, age is not the reason why a relationship doesn't work. Relationships fail when two people's personality does not meet. Two people argue because they think differently. Its ma matter of maturity and not age. I am 6 years younger than my husband and we really dont feel the difference. We dont care about the gap and it will not really matter. Relationship fail when two people fail to listen or when two people find himself different from the other. A relationship fail when love become less...
@writtenreal (3)
• United States
28 Jul 11
I think to a point age does matter, specifically when it comes to people changing. I can tell you right now I am way different than i was 7 years ago. When talking to someone older they seem more wise because they are.
