Is it correct to have live-in relationship to test each other before marriage ?

India
August 25, 2011 10:25am CST
Well!! It is very serious matter. Normally it happens, two people met, they fell in love and then marriage. So next what happen? Some two or three year peace and then comments, arguments, quarrels, fighting and ultimately divorce. So my question is Is it correct to have a live in relation ship before marriage to know and understand each other?
1 person likes this
21 responses
• Philippines
26 Aug 11
No, that's why there's a relationship called boyfriend-girlfriend relationship to know if your compatible with each other before getting married.
• India
28 Aug 11
You cant know each other fully in that one because you spent less time with each other. When you are living under one roof, you will realize the true nature of that person. I mean his life style, mentality and habits.
@parpande (1515)
• Bangalore, India
19 Dec 15
Well I believe it's fine as one could judge if they have the right compatibility and harmonious with each other. On the contrary, if either of the partners break up the pain is also fierce. It's a sensitive decision though but I would be ok to have people having dissent with this way of living.
@CarlHalling (3617)
• United Kingdom
28 Aug 11
I am not in favour of this because I'm a Christian. For me, a couple should be married before living together. Of course, I thought differently before I became a Christian, and I became one quite late, so I experienced many things. But that is what I believe now, very strongly, no compromise for me.
@sizzle3000 (3036)
• United States
26 Aug 11
I think that there is nothing wrong with living with someone before you're married. There are so many variables when it comes to marriage that you really want to get to know the person before ou marry them and that is one way to do that. What if you get married, hate the guys fashion sense but then he doesn't want to comprimise? That throws a hitch in the marriage before it even starts. Or what if you find out that his parents or someone visits like everyday and it starts to annoy you but it's how he's always lived and he's not gunna terll that person to not come over. And it's the same with females. The more you know the person before marriage the better the chance that the marriage will work.
@jazel_juan (15747)
• Philippines
26 Aug 11
It is still ideal to marry first and live together. But personally, that was not my case. As for your question, i find that what happened to me it was more suitable. I found out who he is, what he like, what he does not like and i have fallen in love with a different person when we were living together. He was entirely a different person that i got to love and appreciate more, and given if we have married first before having a family...i honestly do not know if i we would have stuck if not for the children. There were so many rough roads, so many immaturities at first, so many naivete' that it was that hard that we were on the point of separation but we got through it and fell in love with each other again. So will i recommend living in first? still no. Knowing someone, living in first or not..is still an entirely different level. There are couples who live in first who still did not last through..and there are also those who married first also did not last..but there are also those who succeed..so it still depends on the person. Morally speaking, i do not find living in together immoral, its natural for a man and a woman to be together, it is a natural course of nature.
@ronadelle (1547)
• Philippines
26 Aug 11
Personally, I don't agree on this. It's not a good example to the society. As a Christian, I will not encouragement anybody to do that. Happy mylotting!
@chiyosan (30184)
• Philippines
26 Aug 11
i do not think that couples who want to get married should test their relationship by means of living together - this still is not "tested" in itself. =)
• India
26 Aug 11
I guess i am not believer in a live-in relationship. It depends upon one's own choice and values. I guess maintaining a better relation with your partner before the marriage is essential for a long-time relationship. Understanding you partner too is important in having prolong marital relation.
@judelen (428)
• Philippines
26 Aug 11
Hello! For me, religiously I will not agree in live-in relationship before marriage. We know the fact that marriage is a lifetime contract to your spouse and your family. We should know that knowing everything each other is the most important to do before marriage. We should know that once married no turning back, so be careful and the most important that you love each other, because the LOVE that you have will be the most important thing in your relationship to bind your marriage life. And aside, if you believe God in your relationship, He will bless your relationship in marriage because you do according to his purpose. To have a family through marriage is not easy, that's the important thing we should know that in marriage it is full of sacrifices, ups and down, not always happiness. But God knows that, so you should always have your faith and do good in accordance to God's will.
@malihat (216)
26 Aug 11
I guess it depends from person to person. If you're comfortable living with each other before marriage, then you should go for it. However, if you're not comfortable with the idea of moving in together, or it is frowned upon in your society, then give it a miss. I do think that the only way to get to know a person 100% is by living with them.
@jemzchix (116)
• Philippines
26 Aug 11
I think the it depends on the environment and the situation of the two people. here in philippines, our culture is bound by morals that mostly concerns on the upbringing of the dignity of the individual. here, it is not really not pleasant to see lovers living together before marriage. because the two of them still have the possibility to end their relationship, and if that happens, it's really a devastation for the part of the woman and her family. but on the other hand, there are already some couples here in our country that practice living in together. some end up in marriage and are very happy, while some end up in separated ways. so i think it really depends on the couple. buut before they decide on living together, there should be consent from both sides of their families, if they agree to their plans of living together, this is to avoid hassle and speculations on both families once a couple starts living in together.
@yentongs (29)
26 Aug 11
If one would really think about it, a live-in relationship is quite practical because through this live-in period, a person's real attitude would come out and both parties would get to know the other person more. For example, I have this cousin who got married after dating for 2 years or so. Barely a year into their marriage, her husband started abusing her (physical and verbal abuse). At first, she just tolerated it, making excuses like she provoked him or something. But we all know that is NEVER a reason for hitting a woman, especially someone who you're bound to in a sacrament. We got angry at her for staying with him the whole time. Until eventually, she went back to her parents' house where she knew he couldn't touch her. So, you see, that is one of the importance of live-in relationships. I am a Christian, so as expected I wouldn't approve of such situations. But no. I am a practical woman; and for me, living in is important to see your partner's true colors :)
@pibi713 (187)
• China
26 Aug 11
I will not try to have live-in relationship before I get married. If I do that it means I am not sure wether this one is the right one and I don't trust him. If the live-in relationship fails, it is hard to handle the situation. Actually, If you love one another, you get married, you accept each other, the marriage will succeed.
• Philippines
26 Aug 11
I don't think you need live in just to get to know each other. One way to get to know each other is to really be honest with each other. For me, live in is just a way of revealing each others lifestyle. If you really are serious about marriage then you have to accept your spouse no matter who he/she is.
@maximax8 (31055)
• United Kingdom
25 Aug 11
In my home country living together relationships are totally accepted. Due to so many marriages failing and ending in divorce I think a couple should try each other out by living together. Then the couple will learn about each other and see if they are truly compatible. Sometimes love to fade and the couple aren't even good friends. If the couple don't get on they can split up more easily living together than if they are married. If they do get on then marriage can happen and each can be 100% sure they are compatible.
@sql_cell (1427)
• Indonesia
25 Aug 11
Establish a relationship, and later married, and maintain relations remain good, is something that could be considered difficult. Usually, the problem in a relationship is a lie, selfishness, and nature does not want to accept shortcomings. The relationship will work well, if you can live with less good relationship, unselfish, and honest with each other.
@oindy54 (3445)
• India
25 Aug 11
I do not believe in live-in relationships.It is no solution to avoid arguments later in life.Rather people should date for 4 or 5 years before marriage.That way they can get to know a lot about each other and even know each other's flaws too.Being in a relationship too one can know his or her partner's ability to adjust,ability of tolerance etc.No need for a live-in relationship for that.Most live-in relationships do not culminate into marriage.It is rather an escape in my opinion and suited for those who do not want to take responsibility upon themselves.In a long term relationship people have many arguments,quarrels and can resolve their misunderstandings by gradually knowing how to adjust to each other.Well this is only my opinion.Feel free to disagree. Have a nice day.
• United Arab Emirates
25 Aug 11
Living in before marriage should not be used as an excuse to test if a relationship will work out or not. I know some people who lived in together for a while, got married but still end up in broken marriage. It takes two to tango and it takes God's grace and blessings for a marriage to last forever.
@pbbbsra (1214)
• Philippines
25 Aug 11
I am against live-in relationship. It is very unfair on the part of the girl. If the man suddenly realize the wrong things, then he escapes and end the relationship, the girl is left with the broken heart and it won't be easy for her to come in a new relationship again, some get pregnant and become single moms. In any relationship, quarrels and misunderstandings are normal. If two people really love each other, they don't have to put themselves in a trial period. I am against it.
• United States
25 Aug 11
With my religious beliefs it is a no no, but I have done this with my husband. We wanted to know if we could make it living together and we found out that we could. So we moved on to marriage and then to children, we are quite content with our decision of living together before marriage and it made us realize that we are compatible.