who should i believe, my wife or the people who told me?

You have the answer. I read the answers you gave other mylottters and I can see you do not trust what your wife says. Three years of being away idçs a long time. But that is not a good reason for doing some things. I worried about how your own child sees it all. Check all of it carefully as there is a child involved. It is not just a question about how your wife spends the money, it is about using or not using your daughter as an excuse to get more money from you.

very serious topic, can`t say straight, but if I have to then I will say you should have trust on your wife afterall she is your life-partner.

Hi Chiumee, That is a really tough question. I know you need to have trust in your wife but at the same time, you have to wonder why your sister would lie to you. If you are making a decent amount and sending a decent amount home then maybe your wife just isn't budgeting properly. Some people really have a problem with budgeting their money so that all the bills get paid and food is on the table. I think that it is time that you have a serious talk with your wife about how she is spending and ask her about what your sister told you.

Your wife must be spending all your income in investing to a business that will end up in scam which networking business has almost always been known for. I think you know your sister very well. If she does not have the habit of telling lies to destroy relationship then you should believe her. I believe nobody else could be concern about your family but your sibling. She could see what your wife is doing and she is of course concerned because she knows you are working hard and yet your hard-earned money is being wasted by your wife. You should think. How come you are earning dollars and yet you are still begging money from your mother and sister. There must be really something wrong. What is happening to you is not a unique case. I've seen the same kind of situation in many families. If I were you I'd have a heart to heart talk with her. She should tell the truth and even if she does not I think you are intelligent enough to see that there is really something wrong with the way she handles the money. I think you should require her to give you a report of where all the money goes.And even if you are abroad of course you can calculate if she really is overspending or wasting some money. How much is the realistic budget needed for your family in a month? Ask her and then see if that is indeed realistic. If you need to ask your sister then do. You should do something to solve this issue. I think you also have to limit the money you are sending to her. Save some on your account.

I know how you feel this time. Don't just believe in what you hear. Your situation is not uncommon. Many wives had been left by their ofw husbands because of some rumors heard from the husband's relatives. I have a friend who was left by her husband because her husband's family made some false accusations about her. That's really unfortunate. What I can say to you is to verify and check whatever your sisters or others tell you about your wife. On the other hand, you're not beside your wife so you can't be blamed to doubt.

This gonna be serious problem and I think need to be taken care of as soon as possible. You know your wife well 'cause she is your wife. You know when she lied to you. If not, better check it by yourself. You don't know yet which one is telling the truth if it's your sister or your wife. As what the other mylotters said some are making false accusations about the in-laws 'cause they just simply don't like her. But I can see here that something wrong with your wifey, aside from your sister is not asking any money from you. In fact, you are the one who ask help from them financially. You can ask your kiddo but if your wife threatens her not to say anything so she will always say that she's fine. The fact that she wants you to go home means soemthing really went wrong and your presence is badly needed. Why don't you take an emergency leave from your job and go back home and check your family. The reason why you work hard is because of your family but if your family is not doing well so what's the use of working after all. If you gonna do this, don't let anyone knows that you are coming home for you to find out the truth.

Hi,i think you should try to have a good talk with your wife directly, to make sure is other's word true or not. You know, misunderstanding in relationship is very harmful. So communication is vital in relationship, because if you don't know what is on his or her heart, how can your love last?

For me your the one who can tell it when you know the truth but if you confuse just share the taught about the evidence to the peolpe noticed in your wife.

A pleasant day Chiumee, With regards to your main topic discussion, generally, it is better to believe in your wife since she is your other half. However, due to the issues that arise from your sister, perhaps, it is best if you can have your vacation at least for a month to witness the activity being attended by your wife. That is to prevent any other situation that may eventually happen. It is best if you can check the situation first before concluding into final decision. They are both your family. Your wife and daughter is your first family. While your sister is now your secondary family. It is good to believe in your sister, as maybe, she is showing some concerns however, dont conclude yet as to what your sister told you. Pray and ask for guidance on what is the best way that you should do if you cannot have a month of vacation. For sure, everything will be settle accordingly since you have entrusted the situation in the good hands of our Lord Almighty.

really hard situation. but if i were you, talk to your wife. ask her what is her problem and all that. or maybe try to have a vacation to patch things up. family is very important than anything else.

Very tough situation chiumee and hope you can resolve it. I would say entrust your wife but then you are away and things like at times do happen. I have to also agree with Gifts above and have your sister check things out. But have a talk with your wife about your concerns and explain that you just want to make sure that while you are away the family is being taken care of. Best of luck and do hope it is all a misunderstanding and or you get resolve all of it.

Woah... This is quite serious but I don't know, if I was you I think I will believe my sister more than my wife (my husband in this case because I'm a girl). Some of my neighbors have a parent working abroad and you can see that because they have big houses and have businesses or investments. There parents don't work as a doctor or any high paying job, most of them work as a nanny or caregiver. I'm not saying that you should have a mansion by now after three years of working abroad but at least you should see some improvement. Is your sister asking for money? If not then that will make her more credible. Don't you talk to your daughter? Ask her if she really get sick a lot. Family will always be family and they are there to look out for you (well, most of the time) so I will believe them more than my spouse. Good Luck.

Hello chiumee, Its tough to comment on what to do in this situation but i would suggest you to see everything and have evidences then to take any decision.I don't believe any one if i don't have an evidence for it. But still i believe there is something else because a mother cannot be so careless about her child.

Hello chuimee, This is such a difficult situation what do you think, do you think your wife is telling the truth?