My Bestfriend is in Pain

Philippines
September 23, 2011 9:12am CST
My best friend called me to my mobile phone this afternoon, she was very sad. I asked her why, though I have a clue. She told me again in hundred times that her bf is not calling or texting her for many days. I just wonder how could a man be like that. Their relationship is 4 years in the making but his bf is not changing. I told her to start entertaining men though I know that is not a good idea but, I was mad at her bf. My friend is in so much pain and agony, she gave all her life to this man that her world is moving around to this guy. Unfortunately, he always shattered her dreams to make their relationship work. She asked the guy already if he still love her and he always answered yes. I am really wondering if the guy still love my friend but I do not have the courage to tell my friend that maybe his bf is cheating on her, or her bf doesn't love her anymore. I am hoping that what I am thinking is not true and his bf still love her and maybe he is just busy or something that is why he could not find time for her. I do not know really what is behind it.
1 person likes this
10 responses
@bingskee (5234)
• Philippines
23 Sep 11
i think the girlfriend should have a serious talk with the boyfriend. she has to tell him all of what she feels. she has to make things clear. but before she does, she has to be ready hearing things which would not of her liking, and could result to a break up. she has to be ready before deciding to talk things seriously with him. if this is not ended, it will be a continual cycle, and you will definitely be bothered.
@chiumee (850)
• Philippines
23 Sep 11
4 years of unfruitful relationship. wow. that's just a waste of time. she didn't learn nor grow up. she is stuck. help her get out of her situation. it is making her crazy in the end.
• Philippines
23 Sep 11
I understand what you mean. Maybe you are right and thats make her a martyr. I love my friend and I am also hurting. The more his bf hurt her the more she loves him. Sometimes men are hard to understand and this guy is so selfish.
• Philippines
23 Sep 11
Thanks for your comment, they already talked but the guy keep telling her that he loves her. What I only do to help her is by talking to her every time she needs someone to talk to. It is hard for her I know but being blind makes her man to be with her forever.
@jaiho2009 (39142)
• Philippines
23 Sep 11
I know that it's not being demanding or asking too much to send a text message. And her boyfriend is not sending her message for many days? How could he do that if he loves her? Does he ever think that her girlfriend is feeling worried? I guess your friend really need to think of, if she has to continue such kind of relationship or not.
• Philippines
23 Sep 11
Thank you for sharing, I am worried to my friend and I also understand her for not letting his man go. She loves this guy so much and she can do nothing about it. It is really painful to have this kind of relationship, what I do is to just cheer her up and telling her that maybe her bf is just busy.
@chiumee (850)
• Philippines
23 Sep 11
nobody tells anyone to be good, nobody tells anyone to be bad as well. so how can we know what the guy is doing. why does your friend need to keep herself stuck in her bf's thought that they are supposed to be very very faithful to each other. this is not the way relationship goes. if the bf doesn't send any messages for days, let it be. your friend can just send the guy a message that she wants a break up and see if the guy reacts. whatever the response be, your friend will know what to do. or at least she will ask you again for advice.
@katie0 (5203)
• Japan
25 Sep 11
Please dear, as a friend you have to tell your friend you think it's being cheated...
• Philippines
26 Sep 11
Hello thanks for your concern. They say that a true friend tells the truth, In my case I don't have the courage to tell her the truth because I don't want to see the hurt in her face. Maybe in this time somebody has told her already. I wish that she will realize what is really going on between her and her bf.
@larrychen (165)
23 Sep 11
Love is not so easy to keep. If some one doesn't love you, he doesn't. What we can do is quite limited about this. Here I wish your friend to be brave enough to face whatever the result would turn out to be. Good luck to her. And please don't worry so much. Time will show everything out. Meanwhile, we should also learn to face the fact. Only she who is in love knows what a love is there for her.
• Philippines
24 Sep 11
We do not want our love ones to be hurt, I empathize for her. If I could only take away her love for this guy I would. Yes, I am hoping for the best that she can be strong enough to face reality that her only love doesn't love her anymore. I could blame her heart for being a martyr.
@kearkear (963)
• Davao, Philippines
23 Sep 11
She is very lucky to have you as her bestfriend. You know what, it's happening too with my close friend. What I'm always says to my close friend is to make herself free from any doubts or accusations or hurt feelings that his bf doing to her. She should be confident with herself, and show to his bf that she could live without his bf and his lost not her if they have break-ups.
• Philippines
24 Sep 11
That is a good advice. but, my best friend is not that strong and could not give up this man due to the years of their relationship. She always telling me how much she loves this guy and she could not be happy without him. Maybe time will make her realize how much her life is wasted for this man.
• United States
24 Sep 11
this only means he is over her. if he is not answering her calls then the realtionship is over to him and the fact is he hasn't told her yet.. she needs to let him go and move on.
• Philippines
26 Sep 11
How I wish what you are suggesting is easy. I know what you mean and I myself would like to suggest it also to my friend. But things don't work out easily my friend is so sensitive and vulnerable I am afraid that so much pain will make her collapse and depressed. Thanks for your suggestion.
@00fear (3216)
• United States
24 Sep 11
It could mean that he is busy that he doesn't call her or answers her calls. Does he work or go to school? If so that would probably be the answer. He might be going through some things right now too that he might not have time to answer calls. Has she seen him have fun, even on those days he stopped calling her or answering her calls?
@kingparker (9673)
• United States
23 Sep 11
You are just thirty party, and your friend simply call you for help. I would suggest that you might tell your friend to talk it out between her and her boyfriend. You shouldn't involve in it, even though she is hurt emotionally. She has to make clear and know why he is not calling. I hope that her boyfriend simply busy at the moment, not cheating on her. I knew how your friend feel at the moment.
@sunli123 (538)
• China
26 Sep 11
Then have your friend tried to contact her bf these day? Did the guy have any reponse? Maybe your friend need to consider seriously if this is the kind of relationship she expected.
@mobi407 (15)
23 Sep 11
their relationship is making but his bf is chang. i told her start agony she send and give me a all life your gift okay i know really not is behind at...