Friends that look the other way

Friends can be there in many ways. Some are able to talk to you, listen to you, perhaps even advice you and help you out. For others this is too hard. They won't shut you out, will try to behave normal, stay your friend and try to keep life normal for you by doing the normal things. I don't know what kind of people those friends of your are and why they pretend as if everything is normal. But you have to understand that not every friend is the same. Not everyone is that strong and can deal with problems and emotions of a friend (next to his own) as well. There are also friends who will break you with their negative and emotional problems. What I do understand is that they did not turn their back on you. They stayed although they were not able to fill the needs you had at that time. I think we all have friends like that and it's up to us to decide if we (still) see them as a friend or are so disappointed that we prefer to delete them out of our lives.

hi kostas, You mean you feel outcast every time you are with them? Well there are types of friends maybe they are so called friends that will not last for a long time. I hope you will find a true friends happy mylotting

I think that is a sad situation but a rather common one. There are many times where friends tend to be only supportive to a certain extent. Perhaps they have problems of their own and don't want to deal with yours or perhaps they just don't like to ruin the mood of the day. Whatever the reason, a lot of people tend to deal with trauma very badly, so they avoid it. That is the truth of the matter. I try not tell my friends of my problems all too much, unless I really need some support. On the other hand, if they come to me, I'll be as supportive as I can, but I think that in some ways, it leads to a rather dismal environment depending on what the problem might be and it can be uncomfortable enough if the situation is really messed up to a certain degree. Still you must wonder sometimes if people are your friends or just good acquaintances.

Hello KOSTAS499, Friends that don't help you are in trouble is not your friend.I have limited friends but i keep those friends in my list which help me and don't turn back when i need help from them. Yes there are people who don't come up by themselves to help you out instead you need to ask help from them but i personally feel its OK but once someone ask help from a friend and then too he/she doesnot get it then there is certainly a problem one need to think about that friend.

Maybe they have no idea that you are going through some problems. Maybe you can start telling them to listen first to you or if it's okay for them to listen and give you advise. If they just didn't take you seriously and instead of just listening to you they just started laughing at you. Then I think you really made a good decision of shutting them out.

I love friends but I don't really trust them when it comes to solving my problems. Most of them just laugh behind your back anyway. I usually try to look for a solution somewhere else like family members.

I have 2 good friends that I can share my problems with them and they are always willing to give me good advice, and other people that I just hang out with them. If your friends are in the first category maybe you should talk to them and explain that you really needed them to be there for you. If you just go out and have fun without ever talking seriously about your problems, you shouldn't expect this kind of support. Although I believe that for guys it's not so easy to share their problems or analyse everything, they could have at least listened. Did they ever ask you why you have shut them out?