Your kid lost the compition
By C
@ShyBear88 (59275)
Sterling, Virginia
January 24, 2012 4:09pm CST
Do you get all upset when your child doesn't get first place or win the hole compition? Are you know happy if they make second places r second over all or what ever spot try get?
I was watching this show and this mom got all mad because her daughter didnt win first places and get money. It wasn't good enough that her daughter got second places and a small amount of money out of the co potions. She blamed the judges of not picking her daughter when it was clear that someone else was a little bit better. I've even seen parents get mad at there own kid as if us there child's fault for by being the best and winning 1st places all of the time.
As a mom if my child was competing in any thing I would be happy with what ever places she got weather it was good or not. I know in my heart that she did her best and maybe that day she wasn't her beat best but she was still her best. What more could a mother ask for. If my daughter was all said about it I would comfort her and tell her maybe next time you will win but for now be happy for what you got. Everyone needs a turn on top.
1 person likes this
7 responses
@wunderful (55)
•
24 Jan 12
I think you must always be realistic. I always explain to my child that they should enjoy the process and that winning is a lovely bonus, everyone works on different levels of ability, and you win some, you lose some, but if you enjoy what you are doing, that is the point.
It is of course still heart breaking to see their little faces when they don't win, but then I have to remind myself of what I tell them!
I think you have also got to ensure they don't always try things that are greater than their abilities. you do not want to set them up to fail.
@ShyBear88 (59275)
• Sterling, Virginia
25 Jan 12
I wouldn't be sad if my kid lose. They can be all heart broken about it but mommy Ian goof to feel sorry for you. It's life someone got to win and lose. Yes it is about having fun and when your having fun it doesnt matter unless someone tells then that it does matter. Been there done it myself as a kid I learns you lose you lose so I don't feel sorry for anyone if they lose. I'll be happy either way.
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
30 Jan 12
You know, it is difficult as a parent to see that our child doesn't win a competition. However, I've never thought that it was something that we should get upset about.
For example, my son played t-ball last year and their team only won one game through the season. It was hard to see that they didn't experience victory very often. However, I think that the lessons that the children learned in sportsmanship through the season were very important.
@ShyBear88 (59275)
• Sterling, Virginia
1 Feb 12
Yes sportsmanship is very important to teach young child. Even if you didn't win you did your best and they should feel proud of themselves for doing the best they and what they learned in that game or games.
@cupkitties (7421)
• United States
25 Jan 12
No I'm not the kind of person that gets all bent out of shape over something like that. 2nd is better than nothing, but you can't win at everything. I'll feel a little bad for her because I know she'll be disappointed having put all her effort and hopes into that competition. I would do something to cheer her up then.
@ShyBear88 (59275)
• Sterling, Virginia
25 Jan 12
I wouldn't feel bad if my daughter lost but I would try to make her feel better.
@ShyBear88 (59275)
• Sterling, Virginia
25 Jan 12
I agree with you. Show the support don't be upset wig how it turns out. I would be sad if my kid lose I'll be happy either way what ever places they get. I know my kid did her best and that is all I could ever ask for when it's something she loves to do and has fun with it.
@kaylachan (57383)
• Daytona Beach, Florida
25 Jan 12
Winning and loosing is part of life. Those things can't and shouldn't be avoided. However, a parent shouldn't push their children to compete. In a lot of casses, what happens with thease children, is their parents are trying to live their deams with them. Most parents don't admit it of course, but it's obvious. The reaction says it all.
When a child looses something, and the parent gets upset over it, then that's a clasic sign that the parent needs to seak help to learn to let go of their own failings. Kids are kids after all aren't they? Shouldn't they be allowed to be? And, it's obvious some might actually fail because they are being pushed to be something they don't want to be.
@ShyBear88 (59275)
• Sterling, Virginia
25 Jan 12
I competed as a kid my parents never lived through me it was something I wanted to do. Yeah I felt bad if I lost but I would get over it in a few hours. It was nice winning but I can only do my best win or lose. If that is what a kid wants to do it's the parents job to just support them. If my daughter wanted to do an active that had competion I would be there and support my child weather win or lose. Yes kids are kids an lot of parents have really high hopes that the actives there kids do will get then a free ride through school.
@deodavid (4150)
• Philippines
25 Jan 12
hi there shy bear,
Hope your doing great today, I don't have any children of my own and I think to young to have any, but if I did and they got 2nd place or lower I will be proud of my child and just say maybe will get 1st next time. I am not gonna put my kid on the spot because most likely my child was hoping to win too, I don't wanna add any pressure maybe next will just train much better. I have nieces who compete, so somehow I can think in this way. Cheers.
@ShyBear88 (59275)
• Sterling, Virginia
25 Jan 12
That's what I'm going to do with my daughter if she does anyhig that has competion.
@ShyBear88 (59275)
• Sterling, Virginia
25 Jan 12
I don't mind seeing the sad face it don't bother me. If it upsets you to see them broken up about it they are always going to be like that because then they want to be on top all of the time to make you proud and not just beig proud that they did what they did.
