Are you teaching your child the wrong image???
By bjc66bjc
@bjc66bjc (6730)
United States
February 7, 2012 3:31pm CST
Hi mylotters, I have seen parents who are teaching their children
the wrong images...THey are showering their children with a lot of
expensive items and clothes...They are saying to their 10 year old
daughter you need to lose a few pounds..they are not telling their children
things that will encourage them to be good adults...THey are not
teaching them how inportant it is to be productive adults in todays
society..
Not that we have turned out to be so bad ourselves but we should always
want our children to grow up and be the best that they can be..
I think thats why the kids are so disrespectful because a lot of times
the parents do not have the time to teach their children..
Life is precious and we should teach our children such...
4 people like this
12 responses
@LovingMyBabies (85127)
• Valdosta, Georgia
7 Feb 12
I agree that there are parents out there that give their children wrong messages in life. Not all of us parents are that way. My husband and I do not give our kids expensive things at all. My kids get something from the dollar store and they are thrilled!
We try to be very encouraging at all times. I definitely want our children to do much better than were doing. I will teach them working hard pays off and you need ambition and motivation in life. I will also teach them that nothing is handed to you in life. If you work hard you will reap the rewards.
1 person likes this
@bjc66bjc (6730)
• United States
7 Feb 12
LovingMyBabies, I hope I didn't indicate that ALL parents are that
way, if you got that indication I apologize..it was not my attention.
There are very GOOD parents like you and your hubby..there are
parents who truly try thier best to do the right thing for thier
children because that are aware of the fact that nothing is easy once
they get out in society where a lot people do not care about on another..
1 person likes this
@deedee328 (1122)
• United States
8 Feb 12
I too have a child that thinks he has won a major prize when he gets a new gadget or trinket from the dollar store. I have taught them to shop smart and save their money for the important things. WE do so love a good bargain!
@LovingMyBabies (85127)
• Valdosta, Georgia
8 Feb 12
Oh no I know you didn't mean it that way. =)
There are just so many parents out there like this that it makes all parents look really bad. It drives me crazy because like my husband and I there are plenty of good parents out there! =)
Sometimes people don't realize that because there are so many that teach their kids wrong ideas...=)
1 person likes this
@tatzkie23 (770)
• Philippines
8 Feb 12
Yes i agree with this one. Some parents just do this with their children. I have nothing against those parents who give their children a lot of expensive items and clothes, maybe they just want their children to be happy or want their children to experience the things they didn't enjoy when they were young. And also, as long as they have money to buy for those expensive things then why not. But the problem is that, what if those children doesn't give importance to those things they have? What if they just don't appreciate or be contented of what they have? I think it's the duty of the parents to explains things to their children.
And about the 1O year old daughter need to lose a few pounds? Well, maybe she can, if this child is having some problems with her weight and health. But if not, and it's just for other purposes like not having a good body structure and to look good, well, i think it's wrong.
For some parents, they only think about the things that they give to their children. They provide food, shelter, money, or just anything the kids needs, but teaching them about other things like being good, being respectful, being polite, being humble, being kind and other things are just ignored. [i][/i]
1 person likes this
@purplealabaster (22094)
• United States
9 Feb 12
I agree with what you are saying here, Tatzkie. I think that if a parent can afford to give his or her child(ren) expensive things, then it is not necessarily a bad thing as long as the child(ren) appreciate the things that they have and are not always demanding more.
@salonga (27775)
• Philippines
7 Feb 12
Parents are responsible for their children. Children should be taught and disciplined to become good persons, otherwise they would be lost. Parents should teach their children not just in words but by examples because they are books that children read and follow. What they see in their parents they normally imitate so it is very important for parents to serve as good examples to their children. What we see in a child is actually a reflection of how his parents molded him. It is the responsibility of the parents to teach the children what is right and what is wrong. However the problem is if the parents themselves do not actually know what is right and what is wrong. Now these parents are certainly not brought up well by their own parents either.
@deedee328 (1122)
• United States
8 Feb 12
To expand on salonga's post, it is not only parents who do not set good examples for their children. There are some parents who are not present in their children's life to set any kind of an example. I think all of us are born with a sense of right and wrong. That is what we have a conscience (or that gut feeling) for.
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
14 Feb 12
I agree with you. I think parents don’t talk with their kids much, they just talk at them. It’s no wonder that kids don’t listen to their parents when they feel they are yacking and yacking and never listening. I can just see my parents’ mouth moving like in a silent movie right now in my mind’s eye because they never bothered to know me as a human being. I knew nothing of my mother other than her being my mother. I knew nothing about her childhood or growing up… other than her mother hit her every day of her life until she left home to marry.
My mother said nothing of value really… she said things like… if a man isn’t married by the time he is 35 he is qu33r… she said you must have short hair by the time you reach 35 because you will look old otherwise, and some other stuff… but she never said anything meaningful to me.
I know parents yell at their kids, and talk at them, but I don’t think they really listen to them enough to care about what is really going on in their lives.
@ShyBear88 (59282)
• Sterling, Virginia
8 Feb 12
As a mom I always thinks its important to teach your child to respect there bodies and they way you where born to look the good and the bad. I would never tell my daughter the way she looks is wrong if she feels good about herself then that is all that matters. When it comes to how she treats me as her mom I see it as if I respect her and her needs then she should respect me. But respect is only give to people when there actions deem them to have earned that respect.
I do think that some of the reason for why a lot of children don't respect there parents is that there parents don't want to put there foot down and discipline there children when its need it. Also a lot of parents do give there kids every little thing and don't make there kids work for they get or earn it ever they just hand it to there kids like they should have every little thing they want or think of.
@deedee328 (1122)
• United States
8 Feb 12
ShyBear I could not agree with you more. It is so important to teach our children to respect themselves as much as it is to teach respect for others. We are as God has made us, so we should be happy with ourselves.
I am a firm believer in "spare the rod, spoil the child". I did not beat my children. I rarely had to spank them. I was lucky that the removal of privileges worked well in showing them the error of their ways.
My boys learned that me, my husband, and their father had to go to work to have the money to buy things for them, so therefore, the kids had to do things to earn what they wanted. I did not make them do any hard labor like their dad and step dad had to do, but they did have to do chores and keep their grades up, and stuff like that. They learned that if you did not behave and do as you are suppose to, then you did not earn anything and you got nothing. The kids learned what it was to live on a budget. I think that once they are of the maturity level to understand, kids need to know what the family finances are.It is important to teach kids to live within their means. Parents need not feel guilty if they can not afford $120 tennis shoes or a sports car. We are only obligated to feed, clothe, and shelter them until they reach adulthood.
@mykahoy (46)
•
1 Mar 12
Yes, you are right with that my friend. I have observed that some if not all mothers pass the responsibilities of teaching their sons and daughters to their nannies. Parents nowadays give more time with their work than their children. Most often than not, these children where left at home with their yaya or nanny. With this situation, how could the parents teach their children if even a single hour would be so difficult to allot for their growing babies. I believe parents should give quality time to their children. And with this quality time, I mean here, no work to be put in mind, no problems or pressure to worry and no callers to entertain, only you and the children, bonding together, teaching them the good manners and conduct, attend mass together, read the bible together, pray together, watch movie together, go in a picnic, have fun and more. This is what I meant by saying give quality time to your children. With this, your children will feel welcome, would feel he/she belong and special.
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
8 Feb 12
I've seen a lot of that too. All they are doing is creating spoiled, disrespectful brats. It's one thing to give your children nice things but as long as you are teaching them to be good people and that we have to work for what we have etc. I guess in many ways it is a blessing that I've never had money because I really did want to give my girls the best of everything. I couldn't. I worked hard for what I was able to give them and they also worked and do work hard for what they have. They also learned along the way that material possessions aren't all that important. We all like them but nothing can replace good friendships and having a reputation of being an honest, kind and decent person.
@celticeagle (159058)
• Boise, Idaho
10 Feb 12
I think we do forget that we are role models for our children and could very well be teaching our children some wrong images of life and things. And children are very sensitive to how they are treated and what is said to them. I can remember some of that from my childhood. Children see how we treat other people and could get some of this disrespectful treatment of others from that.
@purplealabaster (22094)
• United States
9 Feb 12
I do not think that buying children expensive things is necessarily a bad thing, especially if the parents have money and can afford to do it. Also, if the parents do not necessarily have money but work and save to get their children some expensive items for Christmas or their birthday, then I do not think it is a bad thing as long as the children appreciate the things they have. If the children do not appreciate the things they have and do not treat people and their things with respect, then I think that changes the situation entirely. It is not about whether or not they have expensive items but how they treat people and things, in my opinion.
@deedee328 (1122)
• United States
8 Feb 12
I am sure that I have done things that did not set the proper example for my children, but I did not spoil them. They learned early on that if you want things, you have to work for them. No one owes you anything. Kids today, surely are disrespectful and down right rude. My children were taught to use manners and I am proud to say that they still exercise those manners (at least in my presence) today.
@ReViewMeMedia (3785)
• United States
8 Feb 12
People who just try to make their kids like them by buying them stuff, whatever they want are bad parents, because they don't show them how to be respectful and polite to other people.
@myzhian (584)
• Philippines
8 Feb 12
This so true happening in our society today to see some wrong motivation of parents over their children. To understand the cause and effect of this topic there are some angles to be studied. Some parents have this problem called guilty parent syndrome where in they provide material things as bribes and in exchange of their time, obligation and responsibilities their children, which leads to spoiled and demanding or corrupted attitudes. Too much of things is bad!
