Wedlock and Marriage at an early age for certain reasons: Is it necessary?
@leizldelosreyes (141)
Philippines
April 20, 2012 9:05am CST
Is it really a requirement to get married on or before the age of 30? How do you make it possible when some other people know for a fact that they are getting married not for the right reason but possibly because of all the wrong reasons? Perhaps they have misunderstood marriage and all of it. But I guess it's better for people to see it in a more sensible point of view. What's the point of marrying someone you hardly even know? Are relationships nowadays that instant just as how everything today got so instant? Is it really necessary to marry that person just because of an accident? I guess people should define marriage in a more reasonable perspective. Not just for a shallow idea. What's frustrating is when a divorce or a problem of the same kind happens just because marriage happened at the wrong time and with the wrong person. I am sharing this kind of opinion since I am a product of a broken home and it's frustrating seeing very young couples who used to be happily married or so breaking up and selfishly leaving their children behind. This problem happens not only to young people but also to people of the middle age. Some of them barely even knew how to handle such situations which led to a topsy turvy of events leaving their children suffering their mistakes. So what's your idea on this? Please feel free to leave comments.
1 person likes this
5 responses
@doryvien (2284)
• United States
20 Apr 12
I got married at the age of 30 and some 'concerned' friends told me it was little late. Personally I didn't set any timetable on when I was going to finally settle down, but it was important for me to know the person first and be financially and emotionally stable before deciding to tie the knot. My husband was my boyfriend for more than 2 years first before I decided it's him I wanted to live with for the rest of my life. So far, I guess I made the right decision.
@leizldelosreyes (141)
• Philippines
23 Apr 12
I agree with your statement. It's more important to weigh things first before deciding on tying the knot. I guess it would be much better for young people to be stable emotionally and also financially before marrying the person. Getting to know the person more would even help a bunch before living with the person. I don't even agree with the idea of living with the person right away, without even getting to know the person in a million aspects first. I don't seem to understand why some people nowadays would prefer instant marriages. I'm not sure if they considered the idea of getting to know the person and the idea of preparing oneself first before jumping to it right away.
@ShyBear88 (59285)
• Sterling, Virginia
20 Apr 12
No its not required to get married before someone is or isn't 30 years old. That is really up to that person and there partner. Me got married at 21 and my husband was 20. We got married because we love each other we want to be together regardless of who our family might have felt or thought it was too young. My mom was 19 when she got married and my dad was 22 when he got married. My parents go married for all the right reason just like me and my husband. My husbands parents got married because they where having a baby at like 18 and 19 so they did it for my husband and had 2 more kids after that and then got divorced.
@leizldelosreyes (141)
• Philippines
23 Apr 12
Thanks for your response. I guess it just depends on how both of you compromise with each other then, right? What saddens me sometimes is the fact that some marriages started early and ended up early as well, considering the fact that they got kids. Perhaps, society permits this kind of situation since it's common already. I just think that people should be more sensible when making decisions like this especially when children are involved.
@kukueye (1759)
• Malaysia
20 Apr 12
I guess i think marry only if your want to have children, other than that , u can stay together without marriage, hence giving u the option to break off and find new life partner. In some society marriage is forever, but nowsdays divorce cases are common.Usually reason for breaking up is adultery , lost of attraction to each other and also so kind of financial situation. Hence come to the reason for marriage at the first place which is to take care of each other.Maybe u can do that even without marriage.
@leizldelosreyes (141)
• Philippines
23 Apr 12
Yes, you do have a point. People can stay together without even getting married. Perhaps, marriage nowadays are just nothing to some people. Married couples get divorced and the children suffer the situation. I must say that it's never been easy being a victim of this situation, I've experienced it personally. Nowadays, marriages barely last because of what happens in the society. And it's sad because when there are kids involved, usually they're the ones who will suffer the consequences of their parents decisions. So people should better think more than jump into a situation like getting married since it takes a lot of sacrifice, effort and love to make it last. I also don't agree to arranged marriages since it defeats the purpose of marrying someone who's really meant for you. Although some other cultures are doing it, sometimes it's not good for the people involved.
@jonnifc (1017)
• Philippines
20 Apr 12
I'm sorry to hear that you are part of a broken home. But I guess you make do with what you have and not let it get you down. I don't think it's necessary to marry before 30 years old. It's just an ideal age because late 20's and early 30s are the optimum age for a woman to be pregnant and give birth. Actually after the age of 32, a woman is more prone to have problems during pregnancy. I guess that's just the reason why people think it's important to marry at that age. But it's not really a requirement. I agree with you that it doesn't matter how old you are when you get married. What's important is that you are mature enough to handle a marriage. It's not an easy thing to be married. It takes a lot of hard work, compromises and sacrifices. You can't be married if you're selfish. It just won't work. More so when kids are in the picture. You don't own your life anymore when you have kids. A lot of people think having a family is easy. It's the hardest thing in the world because it will be a lifetime of commitment and responsibilities. 2 things that a lot of people cannot handle.
@leizldelosreyes (141)
• Philippines
23 Apr 12
Thanks for your response, I appreciate it much really. I agree with your statement. I must know since I was a victim of the situation itself. We suffered the consequences of having a broken home. I must say that these experiences taught me a lot, and it taught me the basics of reality. I guess I learned it the hard way, but I'm very thankful. Without it, I wouldn't be who I am today. I wouldn't be able to learn everything that I have learned ever since. This opened my thoughts about marriage and the like. And I also agree that if you are egoistic and self-centered your family wouldn't make it, and it would be difficult to make it last if you will have that kind of mentality. It will create lots of conflict and the worst, separation. This I know because I've seen a lot of examples of this situation already. More like what happened to our family, I should say that it would take a lifetime of everything to make a marriage work.
@einerb (97)
• Philippines
20 Apr 12
Come to think of it, marriage is not like a food that we can easily swallow and vomit if it tastes bitter. Marriage have to taken by all seriously and more on spiritually, because it is not just a union of a two person who like each other, but they are making a bond of commitment of loving, caring and sharing, and that my friend is for life. It is just my opinion.
@leizldelosreyes (141)
• Philippines
23 Apr 12
Thanks for your response, I do appreciate that. I agree with your statement. Marriage is not just a piece of paper that you could just nullify anytime you want for some reasons. It takes a lot of sacrifice, compromises, love and patience. Without it, it would barely even last. Also if you have a self centered mentality, your family would more likely to suffer the consequences of your actions and decisions. I must know since I was a victim of situations like this myself. And I guess, I learned it the hard way though, but I'm very thankful that I've learned. If I didn't, it would be a shame on me then.
