When do you stop being a mom?

@PDBME2 (1014)
United States
May 26, 2012 8:06am CST
I can't help but look at my kids and have so much love for them that I wonder if I will ever really let them go when they grow up? My mom and me haven't talked in almost two years now. Long story but I wonder how my mom could ever stop being my mom over something so silly, just because she doesn't like my husband. My kids are still rather small for my age and I hope that one day when they decide to marry that I will always love them no matter what. Right now I am in the room with them just watching them sleep around me...lol. From the oldest to the youngest I just thank God everyday that He gave me my kids because they made my world complete. I miss my mom, especially when it came to Mother's Day. My mother's day wasn't that great because of my own issues with my mother but my kids made things for me. I don't think they truly understand how much I am there for them and have given up my own happiness at times to make them happy but each day I try to put their lives ahead of my own.
3 people like this
9 responses
• United States
1 Jun 12
I hope that you and your mom will resolve this someday. There is nothing more important than family. I realised this when my dad passed away. In 2005. I still miss him everyday. And I call my mom everyday to see if she is fine. She has health problems now and I worry about her everyday. As for being a mom, my son just graduated from high school and I am so scared that he might decide to move out. He wants to stay home with me while he goes to college next fall, but what if he changed his mind?? then I will be all alone. I am disabled and can't work and I am divorced and never found anyone else. It would be just me and my kitty. I don't want to lose my son. I guess this is every mothers fear when there child grows up. I know I have to handle it better. Good luck to you
@lumenmom (1986)
• United States
1 Jun 12
I can't imagine not being a mom to my daughter who is now 10 years old. I almost had a fit when I had to let her go a few stops on the bus by herself because I had to go to the doctor. She did fine and I know it is important for her to gain her own independence, but I think I will always feel like she's my baby. We have a good talking relationship now (even when we are mad at each other ) and I hope it will stay that way.
@dodo19 (47045)
• Beaconsfield, Quebec
27 May 12
I'm sorry to hear about your situation. I'm somewhat in a similar situation, in the sense that my parents don't like my husband, and don't seem to like the fact that I got married so young and such. At first, they didn't seem to like that we had our daughter last year either. It's difficult to understand how some parents simply don't care about their kids, and may overact over things. I can't imagine ignoring my daughter. I know she's still young and all, but I still can't see myself doing it. Sure, I probably won't always agree with the decisions she makes, but I'm not going to ignore her.
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
27 May 12
Yeah I agree with you. I don't think a person ever stops being a mom. Of course children grow up into adults and have a life of their own. But as parents we will always care for them and be concerned about them when they face different trials.
@safety69 (592)
• Taiwan
31 May 12
Your mom is pretty strong to keep this issue for that long time, and mostly now that you have your kids , she should get close to u , but , sometimes we can not understand people. Time will say , may be if you can get a little close to her things will change. Try to look and have your happyness . When I see my kids I feel so much love for them and feel sorry (some way) that they will grow up one day and that they are going to have their own families, but, thats the circle of life, we have to accept it , and try to get along with our daughters or sons in law. I would like to be a nice mother in law and keep making happy my kids.
• Philippines
31 May 12
I think being a mom doesn't have an end point. I'm sorry to hear about your case and I really do hope that things will turn out fine between you and your mom. Just give it a time and just keep on being a good mom to your kids in whatever way you can.
@donsky14 (5947)
• Philippines
26 May 12
I'm sorry to hear about the issue with your mom...having the same issue with my dad..for almost 8 years now. But anyway, I now have a 2 years old kid, a really sweet little boy...and I would always wonder if his still gonna be as sweet as he is if he turns into a teen. I guess, we never really stop being a "mom", although there would come a time that we would need to draw a line because of certain things. But we would always be there. No matter what
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
26 May 12
Hi PDBME, I can kind of relate to this. My mother was very angry when I married. She just hated my husband and did not speak to me for the longest time. Eventually she got over it but our relationship was already not very close and though we were very respectful and peaceful...I honestly never felt close to my mother. I had 4 girls that are now all grown and I am so close to them. I will NEVER stop being their mom...not ever. Now that they are grown it is even cooler because we can be best of friends and I am still their mom. I don't care for my daughter's choice of boyfriend at all...that is HER choice whether I like it or not. I am here for her in hopes that the relationship gets better and she finds the happiness she so deserves. I am also here if she falls. My days of discipline and telling them what to do and how to do it are over. I raised them with guidance and to be independent of me and their choices are theirs. I support them in whatever they choose to do.
@nonersays (3329)
• United States
26 May 12
My mom stopped being my mom when I was a baby and she walked out on the family. There is no understanding what goes on in some people minds. My little one is only 2, but I can't imagine anything he could EVER do to make me not want to call myself his mom anymore.