Am I really not good at making friends with people?!

China
July 25, 2012 6:10am CST
Today's afternoon,I went back home with a friend.It's really too late and I had to went back home immediately,but she asked me to go to a shop with her,I had told her many times that I didn't want to,but she insisted my going with her.I was kind of irritable that time,but I don't want to upset and I went with her.I thought I was really restricted and I felt bad,what should I do?Should I do what I don't want to make friends?!
10 responses
@moneywinner (1864)
• Brazil
26 Jul 12
I would say YES! We can't do what we like only, we need to do some stuff that we don't like to please our friends otherwise your friendship probably won't last long because no one like a person that only do what she want. That was something that I learn during my life, I lost many friends saying no too many times, it will get a day that they will get tired of inviting you for hang out together.
• China
27 Jul 12
You are very understanding of my situation,I also think I should make concessions.And could you please give me more suggestions?
• Romania
25 Jul 12
I think you'll obtain the opposite effect if you'll do this.You are good as a friend if you are unique no matter in what way,this is mean to be a value
• China
26 Jul 12
But how to be unique?Just to refuse?
• Philippines
26 Jul 12
Not following what your friends tell you to do so does not mean you're no longer a good friend. Neither does going along the flow make you a good friend maker. Just be yourself and don't get pressured if you don't have that much number of friends. Actually, having a few friends or even just ONE FRIEND means a lot already as long as that friend of yours understands, respects, and values you for who you really are. Not for what you can give or do for them, especially not for what or how far you can sacrifice for them. Cheer up! :-)
@surekharathi (14146)
• India
25 Jul 12
why you not feel good at making friends. Friendship is important part of our life so dont feel like this. I like friend enjoying with them, talking with them and lots of masti.
• China
26 Jul 12
But sometimes I think my friends are selfish and don't consider my feelings.I am upset.
@NailTech (6874)
• United States
25 Jul 12
Well, I hope that going with her didn't cause any problems for you and that you didn't stay too long at the shop. She really sounded like she was desparate in taking someone with her, I hope she was just scared to be there alone and just not forcing you to do something out of control issues. I would just insist that I needed to be home immediately, there are two ways about it. Is she your only friend or vice versa? Does he force you to do or otherwise go other places with her? I would drop her if she made this a habit. You have the right to stay home if you want to.
• China
26 Jul 12
She's just my common friend.Yesterday was the case that I had almost got home but she asked me to accompanied her to walk a little longer distance because she was afraid of the dark and I agreeed.But suddenly she said she wanted to go to a supermarket to buy something.I told her that it's too late and I had to go back home immediately,but she grabbed my arm and spoiled for a long time and unknowingly we got the supermarket.When we got there I was already very impatient but she still grabbed me.I can't understand her!
• China
25 Jul 12
As the old saying goes: A friend in need is a friend indeed.I think friendship means help from the other when one is in trouble.But friends should respect their decisions and not cause inconvenience.Besides,making friends needs right time.Not all the people can be real friends.So I think we can get happiness from our real friend.
• China
26 Jul 12
Yes,I agree with you.Maybe she's not suitable to be my friend.
@GemmaR (8517)
25 Jul 12
It is hard when your friends want to do something different than what you want to do, but if you didn't want to go to the shop then you shouldn't have to apologise to your friend because at the end of the day you don't have to do anything you don't want to do. We all sometimes have to make do with things that we don't really want to do though, because you might have something that you need to do at some point that you wouldn't be able to if your friend didn't go with you, even if they might not actually want to go but they would do it anyway because of the fact that they're your friend.
@Jake809 (97)
• Denmark
25 Jul 12
It isn't about that you aren't good making friends with people, but it is about your friends not pressuring you to do something you do like and you shouldn't do something you don't like even if you think it might hurt them. You have to first take care of your needs before you can take care of theirs, because if you don't do that, then you wouldn't be happy to be with them and they will feel that too.
• India
25 Jul 12
Well all I can say is that sacrifices are one of the main ingredients in the sweetness of friendship. You sacrificed time for your friend, it was very nice on your part. Depending on how serious you were to report at home, it was her duty to understand your situation. The question of yours will be answered seeing whether if you are the one making sacrifices all the time. If that is the case, friend of yours should prove himself less selfish. As your situation, she may be urgently needing to reach shop and wanted you to accompany. May be you would have done same if you are kept at her position.
@Raine38 (12257)
• United States
25 Jul 12
By not being true to yourself won't also help you making any friends. How can you expect other people to be comfortable around you if you can't even be confortable with your own decisions? Friendship is a two-way traffic, it's not about one person only, nobody calls the upper hand in friendship. If you don't feel like it, tell her and do your own thing. If she's a good friend she will understand that you're simply not interested. If she don't, well, it's better to hang out with someone else.