Would you lend a big amount of money to a friend?
By mhii_bear
@mhii_bear (13)
August 10, 2012 8:34am CST
Do you think lending money to a friend alters your relationship?
Some people think that when money comes into play, many relationships experience a shift and friendships are not excluded. Some would reason out and say that a friend who helps in need is a friend indeed. Where do you draw a line between money and friendship?
3 people like this
10 responses
@ravisivan (14079)
• India
10 Aug 12
welcome to mylot. In a relationship two types cannot exist--one cannot be a friend and also a borrower. Either he should be a friend or a borrower of money from you.
Money lent to friends will affect the relationship -- may be due to genuine reasons of business loss or luxury spending by the borrower-- he may not be able to repay and when once it is asked for it will spoil the relationship.
There are instances when a lady who lent only Rs.50 ($1) asked for it being returned and was killed. this happened in delhi about a month or two back.
1 person likes this
@ravisivan (14079)
• India
11 Aug 12
Pavan
welcome to mylot. A friend can borrow money. the friendship will continue till such time the lender asks for return of the money. If the lender asks money back and the person borrowed is not able to repay for some reason or other-- then the relationship is strained.
A reference from another site:
"But there are people who voluntarily gives loan when they see their close friends or relatives in trouble. Bur the person who receives the loan take it as granted and never bother to return it in time. When this happens the lender has to remind the borrower to return the loan."
http://www.indusladies.com/forums/blogs/pushpavalli-srinivasan/tamil-proverbs-continued-798/
In Tamil we have a phrase which implies "Loan breaks the love". Perhaps you do not agree. good. no problem. I will not force my views on anyone. have an excellent day.
@Pavan_m01 (115)
• India
11 Aug 12
hi I dont agree with your point that says friend and borrower relationship will not exists. . so you are saying a friend will not borrow money from you? If he borrow then you will not consider him as your friend do you ? for some reason if your friend borrows money from you then will you treat him differently?
@jaiho2009 (39142)
• Philippines
10 Aug 12
This situation depends on how much you know that friend.
Money usually causes break-ups especially when it comes to friendship.
So,before lending someone a big sum of money- you must know your capacity..how much you trust that friend or how willing you are to lost the money and keep a friend.
@chookie1971 (2271)
• Australia
10 Aug 12
I don't lend out big amounts. very small amounts are fine as long as they pay back the amount. But if they don't pay it back, they don't get any money from me.
A nephew asked for money 2 times, but I turned the tables. I said to him, We need a bigger amount that you and we have a 72 hour demand. It is amazing how his attitude changed after that.
@mhii_bear (13)
•
10 Aug 12
that's true. when the tables are turned they discover what it feels like to be in the fix. and you get to realize what kind of person they are.
@jugsjugs (12967)
•
12 Aug 12
In the past I have lent money to friends, as well as to family.I will say that no matter who you lend the money to it is always a risk, as people will say that they will pay you back, yet in the end they do not pay you.
I do not lend money anymore, neither do I let people borrow things off me, as these are the people that never repay or give things back when you need them back,. or when they have said they will pay you back.
@blummus (451)
• United States
10 Aug 12
Honestly, I would probably not make a loan anymore because trying to get it back is a hassle even if the friend has good intentions. If I have money enough to loan I'd give it to them. If I can't afford to give it, then I should not loan it out anyway.
@mhii_bear (13)
•
10 Aug 12
your friend is such a fortunate friend. he's got someone who's not wiling to lend but give money. :)
@ravisivan (14079)
• India
10 Aug 12
blummus -- i suggest and follow your strategy. if i give money I do not expect it to be returned. So if I have Rs.1000 with me in cash then I may lend Rs.100 or less than that only and not expect it to be returned back.
1 person likes this
@mhii_bear (13)
•
11 Aug 12
indeed, it's a great idea. your friend won't be able to say you didn't lend him money... when in fact you gave him money!
@Pavan_m01 (115)
• India
10 Aug 12
Even I agree that Money can alter Many relationships May not be only friendship. If you dont lend the money when your friend is in really in need then he might thing you are not his best friend this may be results in brake up of the friendship.
When it comes to my case I may not lend the entire amount which asked. But I will definetly lend a part of it depending on his need, availability and repayment status.
@Pavan_m01 (115)
• India
11 Aug 12
i agree our relationship status may change. The trust and believe on him may alter. . Still he will be my friend. . I am not a kind of person who will break friendship just for the money. I can assure that since you have given money when he needed, a sense of relief will be with you
@mhii_bear (13)
•
10 Aug 12
and what if your friend does not return back what he borrowed? Do you agree that your friendship might change?
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
11 Aug 12
Though I used to be the kind of person that would give loans to friends, I am not that kind of a person anymore. Instead, I will give a person money if they need it and I've got it, but I will never think of it as being a loan. The reason that I will not think about it as being a loan is because if it is a loan, then it could be something that will ruin a friendship. On the other hand, if it was a gift to a person, then it cannot cause conflict in a friendship.
@riyauro (6421)
• India
10 Aug 12
Well I don't have any friend so close that he or she will ask me money. I am very isolated. It will depend on the friend and the need of money. If I have more than enough (which I don't have at the moment), I will give it and if I give it I will not expect it back. If he or she is responsible enough he or she will return but I will not expect it. thanks for sharing, have a wonderful day. 
@Sparta72s (60)
• United States
11 Aug 12
You shouldn't really lend money to a friend as they tend to not pay it back and why they ask for money they did not have in the first place. My mom learned the hard way after she lend a few of her friend some money and they left to another place. You should get a contract with a lawyer or something and take them to court if they don't pay it back. I wish my mom made better decisions though. Wondering why I'm so different from her.
@Mark72125 (135)
• United Arab Emirates
10 Aug 12
I personally wouldn't mind to give loan to some of my close friends.It depends if you trust someone enough and have been with him/her for a long amount of time , I believe you should give a loan to him/her.Because,a real friend will eventually return you the money when you ask for it or atleast let you know or give a valid reason if they don't.Other than my close friends , I don't think I will go through all the troubles of loaning someone else money.All in all,it's your personal decision.
