who must be on the delivery room?

My wife want me to be there when she deliver our child but for me I don't want to see my wife situation inside the room. Besides, some of my friends told me that they are full finger cut from their wife due to pain. I don't want to receive any cuts from my wife fingers.

I agree with the daughter. It is better to let her boyfriend feel/see and experience how hard it is the moment the woman give birth. Some men never understanding how much sacrifice their wives has suffered. The best way to make them (men) understand the hardships of labor (delivering a baby) is to make them see (aware) and experience it in real.

a daughter needs her mother when going through this. i wanted my mother but she was never there. none of my husbands could handle it. they chickened out so it was always me and the nurse and doctor alone but my oldest daughter chose me and made her husband mad. i dont care i wanted to be there for her and felt it was my right.

Either the boyfriend or the mother can be with her in the delivery room coz both of them are very important in her life. But if this would be an issue that might trigger some disappointments, then she should just let no one with her.

I always choose my mom instead of my husband. I gave birth twice and my mom always there for me. Maybe it's because the bonding of mother and daughter that happened between mom and me. I love my mom very much.

Ultimately its the person who is pregnent who gets to decide. The last persona I would want in the room is my Mother. Since the boyfriend is the father then I would pick him personally. Even thoguht they arnt married, marraige is a ring, and a piece of papper doesnt prove anything.

If they are planning to be married it should certainly be the boyfriend. Or as the girl says, he should see what a woman has to put up with when she is pregnant and when she is having a baby.

I think it would be whomever the pregnant mother chooses...I wouldn't want to be there with my daughters. I couldn't stand to see them in so much pain. I think the father is the number one choice though. He should be there.

Ive not yet been pregnant but i believe here in the USA two are allowed in. However, if having to choose one, id also choose the bf, he is the babys father and should see the birth.

Mom's choic on this one, who she chooses to be with her for what ever reason.

I don't think I will accept anybody besides my husband, my children, my mother and my sister, other than them, I don't think so. My husband was with me both of the time in my labor, he couldn't do much but it was nice to have his support.

Your friend's observation seems very weak. The girl and the boy have lived together and that has resulted in birth of a child. where is the secrecy between them. Again it depends on practice. In India they do no allow people inside delivery room. But in USA - they insist that the boy be with the girl at the time of delivery. I am of the view the girl's choice is right.

Hey thanks for the lovely discussion. i believe that out of boyfriend or mother, a mother should always be there inside a delivery room as she can help her daughter or daughter in law to patiently handle the pain as she knows very well how to handle it when she had herself given birth to her daughter. Besides presence of a lady during the delivery will give her a moral boost rather than presence of a male person. What say?

Some interesting responses! I think that the daughter should think about who would be best for HER to have with her. Its all very well to say the boyfriend - just to let him see how much women suffer in childbirth but if she's only doing this to make a point and does not feel he will be of much support to her then i don't think its the best choice! My husband would be useless - he was a gibbering wreck on our wedding day and said "awful wedded wife" instead of "lawful wedded wife!" which i have NEVER lived down. If it was me - i would want my best friend there - someone to make me laugh and distract me!

No way! The father should be in there if he is taking respondsibility as a father.That is if he wants to see his child being born and support the woman that he loves during her painful time.

When my daughter was struggling to deliver her first baby, she chose me over her partner because she wanted my help. She knew I was more understanding of what was going on and would know what to do whereas her partner would be standing around, not knowing what to do, feeling uncomfortable and likely to faint. (Bad enough that he was there at the conception!) I just don't think that childbirth is about teaching the bloke a lesson. It is a deeply intimate moment for a female and not something a man is able to understand unless he is very wise and a special person. If the guy has been there for his lady from the time they both knew of the pregnancy, if he knows what is involved, what is going to happen and what his girl will need then sure, he has shared everything so far, he will probably appreciate the birth. If the guy however has not had much to do with the pregnancy other than the conception, then no amount of the real life vision and details of childbirth will make him a better parent or partner.

She should be allowed to have more than one person in the delivery room. I know you can have at least two (maybe 3) where I live. But, if you meant the mother was asking just to be curious who she'd pick if only one was allowed, it would definitely be a hard decision. Your mother and the father of the child (or the boyfriend - If one or the other was involved in the picture) would be the two people the pregnant woman would want in the room for sure. Both, for good reasons. A mother is a good choice to be in the room because she's been through it. She understands the process of it and can give plenty of support and be there to comfort her daughter. The girls mother would also want to be there for her daughter, as well as to be there to welcome her grandchild into the world. The father of the child/your boyfriend, also has good reason to be there as well. It's good for the father of the baby to be there to experience the beginning of fatherhood, to welcome his child into the world, and to support his girlfriend as well. I do agree with what your friends daughter said about wanting her boyfriend to be there to see what a woman has to go through/suffer to give birth (lol). In my opinion, whether they are married, living together, or not, it doesn't matter. They are still together in a relationship and if he is the father of her child that's even more of a reason for him to be there! It really is a tough decision and a touchy subject. My girlfriend is pregnant with our child right now, we are due at the end of January and I know she will want both her mother and myself there in the delivery room. I hope your friend and her daughter can come to a fair decision without hurting anyones feelings and hopefully they can both be allowed in with her!! All the best of luck to you and her family in the decision making and the future!

I was very lucky when my daughter gave birth because she allowed me, her b/f, and his mother to be in there when the baby was born. She was a little uncomfortable with his mother being in there but she allowed it because she wanted to allow us to be a part of her experience. If there was only one person allowed, I would have gladly stepped back and supported the father being in there. I think the father should be a part of the birthing experience because it will give him a greater respect for the mother and what she went through to bring his child in the world. It is a time for bonding too. Sometimes, as mothers, it is easy to over step boundaries. Your example is one of those times when perhaps mom should allow the daughter to make the choice without feeling as though mom is offended.

The mother may be more helpful to her daughter during childbirth, but the boyfriend is the father of the baby and should be there to participate in the birth. Period.

hi lyn, I will also choose the boyfriend so he will see and understand how much pain a woman suffer during giving birth. happy mylotting