Feel so bad to see my mom crying

@kokomo (1867)
Philippines
November 30, 2012 6:02am CST
Did you feel the same way too fellow mylotters? Yesterday, my mother talked with me and shared her anxiety about my brother's behavior with her. According to her, she noticed that my brother became disrespectful with her. He is very hardheaded and she cannot tolerate already his attitude. My brother did not went home in one night this past few days because mom scolded him and my mother was so bothered and so worried. She blamed herself why was my brother was already like that and she kept on crying. Of course,I as a daughter,felt as if my heart was melting while watching her crying. She was asking my help to talk with my brother and ask what was his problem with her.
6 people like this
24 responses
@wolfie34 (26771)
• United Kingdom
30 Nov 12
I am 41 years of age and a guy and it still makes me upset to hear my mum cry, her husband, my father treats her really badly, not physically but bullies her and manipulates her and the way he treats her makes me angry but I can't do anything about it, because he will then take it out on her even more. I wish she would leave him and it's a decision only she can make. I just want to comfort her, but it's hard not knowing what to say and to be sensitive to her feelings.
1 person likes this
@wolfie34 (26771)
• United Kingdom
30 Nov 12
Thank you that means a lot.
1 person likes this
@stary1 (6612)
• United States
30 Nov 12
wolfie34 You sound like an awesome son. Just keep supporting her privately if that is all that can be done. Knowing you love and support her will give her a lot of strength. Bless you both...
1 person likes this
• Philippines
30 Nov 12
Oh, I guess you reallyneed to do something. Maybe your mom can't talk to him because he's avoider her. I hope you'll be able to fix things for your mom. It's really saddening. to see our moms crying in front of us. You have to be tough for your mom. Goodluck.
1 person likes this
• India
30 Nov 12
Nice auggestion dear.. I was also thinking the same..
1 person likes this
• Philippines
30 Nov 12
Oh, we have the same advice. Yes, I guess she should fix it. I guess his brother is enjoying his life and he wants his freedom and now he's rebelling. I hope he'll be okay. He should realize that he's already beyond his limitation. He's already breaking rules and he's disrespecting his mom. Too sad. Why is it happening to him. Maybe it's peer pressure or it's his own choice...
1 person likes this
@ladym33 (10979)
• United States
1 Dec 12
I understand why that would make you sad as well. I don't think anyone likes to see their mother cry and obviously your brother has hurt her very much. It is probably a good idea to find out what is going on with your brother and to also let him know how hurtful he has been. Possibly something is going on with him that is bothering him and he may need to really talk to someone, but he should know how badly he hurt your mother.
1 person likes this
@bellis716 (4799)
• United States
2 Dec 12
It's OK for you to talk to your brother about his attitude. Perhaps you can be a mediator. Don't let your mother give in to your brother and give him anything he wants just because he acts ugly.
1 person likes this
@jenny1015 (13366)
• Philippines
1 Dec 12
I feel for your mother. I, too would find myself crying if one of my sons would be talking back at me. We, as parents have always wanted to raise good children as much as we can. And seeing our kids to be behaving this way truly rips our heart. But I realize, that sometimes, it is the influence of other people that a child could be that way towards their parents I would also cry when I talk to them and tell them just how much I have sacrifice for them just so I am always at there side whenever they need me. No other person can help them to realize their mistakes but themselves. But, it would help somehow if you can talk to your brother in the most subtle way so that he may understand what your mother wants to tell him. I pray that your brother be enlightened and that your mother would end blaming herself for what your brother has become.
1 person likes this
@asliah (11137)
• Philippines
5 Dec 12
hi, yes my friend,i don't want to see my mother crying especially if she cry because of me,i know she is more sensitive now so she is really faster to cry and feel sad,that is why i give all she wanted till i can give,i really love my mother because she is a really good mother for me,my best friend and even a sister.i don't want to give any problem to my mother,i don't want her to think and be stress,i want her to enjoy her life to the fullest.
1 person likes this
@2004cqui (2812)
• United States
1 Dec 12
He's going through a phase. He's trying to show his independence. All three of my boys went through this phase. Today they have lives of their own and they've all seen the error of their ways. They are pretty responsible and actually remember my birthday and are very attentive to me.
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
30 Nov 12
Yeah I can understand how you felt for your mother. As teenagers get older they feel the need to want to do their own thing. They start to feel as if their parent is holding them back or being too restrictive. Hopefully in time your brother will start to appreciate what your mother is trying to do for him.
1 person likes this
@stary1 (6612)
• United States
30 Nov 12
kokomo Bless you Mother...it is hard to see kids not doing what they should and of course as Moms we always blame ourselves. We think we could have, should have done something different and the current situation would never happen..but it doesn't always work that way. Sometimes kids just do what they do inspite of all our hard work. Give your Mom a hug from me and all of us and tell her we understand what she is going through as many Moms have had the same heart ache.
1 person likes this
@Dassodils (2010)
• India
30 Nov 12
Oh.. really sorry..Say to your mom that all boys are like this.Some times they will be very hard. But they keep love in their mind to parents especially to mom.They can not hate parents.I think that your brother were in a bag mood.That is why he behaved like that. and wait for some time.let him to be free mind.and then tell your mom to go to him and ask about the problem.Tell to your mom that do not show any angry to the son.He will be okay with in some days.Or your brother is continuing this for some days, you have to enter in to this case to solve in a good manner.You should not support one person in this matter.You have to listen to them and ask your brother to be a good son.Be happy.. everything will be alright..
@mariaperalta (19073)
• Mexico
30 Nov 12
I understand how she feels... seems like its time for her to have a long talk with him. Good luck to all of you.
@edvc77 (2141)
• Philippines
1 Dec 12
Yes, it breaks my heart whenever I see my mom crying too. It's kind of different. Maybe because she is my mother. The attachment is there. God Bless
1 person likes this
• Philippines
30 Nov 12
Hi kokomo. The situation is normal with any family. There's a generation gap between your mom and brother. We do usually have those times that we and our parents cannot comprehend well enough about our thoughts. It's great that you are there with your mom so that someone can comfort her. Just let the heated argument pass and once they're both cool down, your brother will be back home. You may also talk to your brother and ask what went wrong so that you can relay the concern to your mom. I hope your mom will become emotionally strong because they are the one we always look up to.
@ZoeJoy (1393)
• United States
30 Nov 12
We always expect our parents to be the strong and supportive ones. But, especially as we get older, we may at times, need to be supportive towards our parents. There was a time when my daughter ran away from home and I had to ask my sons to talk to her. She was not talking to me and so, I was hoping that her brothers could reach her. Her brothers did talk to her and so did several other people. At that time, she would listen to others, rather than her own mother. Now, that she is older, we had a much better relationship. I didn't cry in front of my sons but when my daughter came home, she did begin to realize that I really do love her and deeply care about her. Sounds like your mother deeply cares about you and your brother. I would be supportive but also, try not to melt down like your mother. Be encouraging and help your mother find encouragement, even through the difficult times.
@prashu228 (37652)
• India
30 Nov 12
ohh so sad to hear that. But why your brother is being so rude to your mother , there should be some reason . Is he a teenager? I mean some teenagers do act like that due to hormonal changes. we should treat them with love and affection.
1 person likes this
@doroffee (4223)
• Hungary
30 Nov 12
Oh, I'm really sorry for you. I don't know what could have happened with your brother, but it's so bad to see a mom "failing" when she did everything for a person, yet she gets this back... talk to your brother and try to tell him not to act this way, or at least ask him why he behaves like that to your mom, maybe your mom does some stuff onconsciusly which could be hurtful.
1 person likes this
@hlfbldmom (743)
• Philippines
30 Nov 12
I cant stand when I see my mum crying I will cry too. I don't want anybody to disrespect her. I really love my mum so much so it will break my heart when she feels sad and crying. Sometimes when my mum is telling me that she is upset because of what my brothers or sisters told her I immediately talked to my siblings about it and warned them not to do it again. When it comes to my mums feeling I am very sensitive. I don't want to see her sad because I know how much hardship she's been going through when my father left us.
• Philippines
30 Nov 12
Im sorry to hear about your mom crying. I dont wanna see my mom cry too, it breaks my heart.=( It's good coz she has you & you could help her with that problem. Your brother may be in his adolescent stage and they're so hard to understand since they're still adjusting & changing. Just talk to your brother in a nice way & make him understand. I hope everything will be well with you & your family.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
30 Nov 12
It is indeed a very eerie feeling to see you mother crying in front of you. It's just like your not just comfortable seeing her that way but also your not really want your mom to settle things that way. Nevertheless, mothers are the every emotional ones in the family. One fact is that they are all women and they do bring with the the emotional essence of a person more than men. Anyway, what makes it even sadder is that the reason she's crying is because of your brother. What a scenario. My hugs are yours, friend
1 person likes this
@dee777 (1417)
• South Africa
30 Nov 12
Your mom should take back her power. I am sure that this is not the first time that he made her cry? It looks as if he acquired the skill in how to upset her. While he still stays under her roof, he should obey and respect her. Your brother had no right to be disrespectful towards her. Encourage your mom to write a letter to him and she should make it clear how he made her feel. In the letter she should tell him that she insist he change his attitude. All privileges in the house will end unless his actions change. In the letter she should give him a deadline.I feel sorry for your mom, because she loves him, but crying is not going to change this situation. She must stand up and not bow to his rude behavior.
1 person likes this