some friends really misuse friendship

Hi there pomwango, i think it is quite impossible not to think there are those friends that are like this, and yes it is common to some who might be abused because they allow themselves to be abused by their "friends" who know how to take advantage of such opportunities. the thing is, i may have allowed myself to just let these pass, but only to some extent and not to the point where i am discomforted or when i am to go out of my way to please this friend. usually when i would have to go out of my way to accomodate a friend, then i won't be doing anything at all such as this example of yours.

Some people have been friends so long that they forget the other is fragile as well. Maybe you can remind her that you are her friend and not an assistant or something. Of course, in a calm manner. Her reaction will then determine how much she cares for your friendship.

No, not since Jr. high. I do know of someone who is like that though. He is as someone described a "parasite friend". One of his friends happens to be in love with him and he uses that persons feelings as a way to get what he needs. Its sad because out of all the friends he has, I think that person is the only one who is ever really there for him. One day he will be very sorry for the way he treated them.

No I don't have friends like that, but I had friends worser as that. The thing is that you accept it and because you accept it your friend will go on with her behaviour. So next time you send her kids back home. Next time you tell her you have no space in your fridge. Also interesting: take your stuff over to her place and ask her to save it for you in her fridge. Will she do the same for you?

Yes, I agree. Some use friendship to take advantage and actually just use the person. Let us be careful in choosing friends. God Bless

I think your friend feel comfortable with you that's why. Take care. Good luck

Hi there and welcome to Mylot. Friendship is about give and take, not one friend giving and the other doing all the taking. Friendship is NOT about using someone, controlling them, manipulating them or taking advantage of their kindness. I recently ended a 9 year friendship because I couldn't compete against facebook, I was doing all the giving and she was doing all the taking, she was taking me for granted and I had had enough. Life is too short to waste on so called friends who misuse you!

People who behave in this manner are not ones real friend. They are the type of people who become friends with others based on the benefits that the friendship has to offer. This type of friendship is called parasitic friendship and such people should be far from people. Though, if you still see their good actions, then you need to talk to them and let them know what it's that's bad they do.

I DID have a friend like that, used and abused me all the time. I got sick of it and told her I did not ever want to hear from her again! She would expect me to drop my life for her and babysit her 2 kids all the time. It got old fast! With friends like that you don't need enemies thats for sure!

Well, it is cold enough here and if my refrigerator broke down, I would put the food outside. Let me correct that sentence. I live with my Mom...if her refrigerator broke down, we would put the food outside. If we had a stocked refrigerator, and I was worried about losing food, then I would ask the neighbor if we could use the space. Now, this friend of yours just came over and put her food in your refrigerator? You allowed her to do that. You might have told her that there wouldn't be room in your frig, you were going shopping, etc. If her food is in your frig, than I would say you can eat her food, because it's in your frig. I agree with you though, she could have asked before putting her food in your frig. This friend will take advantage of you over and over again and they won't change. You can mention these little incidences to her, let her know what's going on in your head, and tell her you feel she is taking advantage of you. Will she change? That's up to her, but it's better than being angry at her. Good luck.

Fortunately I do not have friends like you have. I would flatly refuse if she wants me to baby sit her children because I also have a schedule and work to complete. 1-2 hours maybe I can take care of her children but not for more than that. You should immediately reject if he suddenly appear without asking your opinion or your readiness to help. You will find it hard if you always let her do anything to you without asking you 1st. You have to be firm with your friend. Say that you want to help her but not now because you're busy and you have to do something important.

Did she said please or ask you for it begging for this? I think you as a friend would always be there to help her and always there to support her. But the way she just did to you is something that seems she are just using you. Well, let's take the benefit of the doubt, before, do you used to ask any favor with her that she did without hesitation? Then, she is asking for a return without uttering it.

its not really misuse but complacent. I mean she grew complacent that each time she needs you, you were always there and you let her decide things first. talk to her. make her understand that she can't do things and not consult you first because you're her friend not her keeper. don't let this make your friendship go to waste. Goodluck!