There could be several reasons for a relationship to fail...

India
January 27, 2013 7:26am CST
There is a huge increase in breaking up of love relationships worldwide. There could be several reasons such as infidelity, not showing enough love, not caring enough, economic issues, not accepting the shortcomings of the partner etc.. However, ego seems to be most common factor that causes break up in many relationships. Why should we let ego ruin the relationship?
13 responses
@vandana7 (90227)
• India
27 Jan 13
The whole problem is the people dont identify "ego" as such...they identify their hurt...but they also have their want or desire...and priorities...which they want the other to give in to...just for the sake of it... Maturity is ...identifying whether such desires and needs are truly worth it...and whether they should be pursued, and whether some other thing needs to be attended to before this need or desire... A daily routine of asking another person how are you is forgotten, and do you need anything from me today is forgotten and telling thank you is forgotten...and finally I love you is forgotten...if these four are done as a ritual..there cant be many marriages breaking..right?
• India
28 Jan 13
Vandi, you must be in Harward as a professor in psychology. I fully agree with you that people most often identify their hurt and also have their desires, desires and more desires....endless desires. unreasonable desires too. In particular women are never content...
@vandana7 (90227)
• India
28 Jan 13
myLot should have laws against such discriminatory remarks..
• India
28 Jan 13
yes, it will help men greatly, thanks Vandi.
@vivek19 (218)
• India
28 Jan 13
The reason, as you expressed here, for breaking of relationships is only ego due to which all the problems arise. It is a natural thing that most humans have and in e'er relationships, the "battle of sexes" issue play the biggest role as ego in breaking of relationships. What you think...
• India
29 Jan 13
Both men and women carry ego I think. Men used to carry ego much more than women a few decades ago. Now both men and women seem to have ego equally. That's why there are more breakups now.
@babyeve (1049)
• Seychelles
28 Jan 13
Most of the time it is due to infidelity like you have said. Some people does not know how to value love and nurture it as well. The moment they go through hardship, the first thing they think of is to break up. Ego is something that many young people has got today and they also believe in karma as well. God is the foundation of a good relationship according to what I believe in. Without God, we are nothing.
• India
30 Jan 13
yes, infidelity is the reason for most breakups worldwide. With God's grace we can get over these problems. Real faith can do wonders.
• China
28 Jan 13
Yes I agree with you,ego not only is the reason to ruin the relationship between the lovers but also ruin the relationship between the workmates and relatives,so we must learn to give and dedicate ourself sometimes.
• India
30 Jan 13
yes skyandgrassplot, ego will ruin not only relationships but also friends, career and many more.
@airasheila (5455)
• Philippines
28 Jan 13
good day to you vijayanths, indeed there are a lot of reasons why a relationship get ruined. on top of it, is the ego or the pride that a person has. due to this attitude, relationship that encounters some trials truly leads to break-up and wreckage. in this regard, partners should put some limits on their pride or ego. though it is really difficult to eat up our pride but if this will be the way to revive and renew the good relationship, then, why not change it. i mean, it is like doing a program in your agenda. thus, trying to reprogram some things in life could lead to achievement that can give us more and better result.
• India
30 Jan 13
I can't agree more airasheila. as you rightly pointed out, partners should put some limits on their pride or ego. Also trying to reprogram some things in life could lead to achievement.
@obe212003 (2299)
• Philippines
28 Jan 13
Definitely relationships end up in breakups for a lot of reasons, and i guess it depends on the people involved. Basically, the ego thing is a real overwhelming factor, but i think when there is REAL love, respect, understanding, patience, initiative and faith, then the probably of a relationship ending would be minimal.
• India
30 Jan 13
as you rightly pointed out, ego does play a huge role in many break ups. I agree with you that when there is real love, trust and understanding, other things will fall into place.
• Philippines
28 Jan 13
I agree with you. But there comes a point that it's no longer just "ego" When we have been abused so bad, to not end that relationship would mean erasing any self-respect and any relative sense of justice we should have.
• India
30 Jan 13
Abuse in any form physical or verbal needn't be tolerated. Again it all depends on individuals. Abuse and dis respect would lead to end of relationships.
@jaiho2009 (39182)
• Philippines
27 Jan 13
dear anna, Well, I don't know why there are people who choose to save their ego instead of saving their relationship. There are other reason why relationship must end, though it seems unreasonable to others but who are we to judge. Have a great day dear anna
• India
28 Jan 13
dear sister Jo, most commonly people are keen on saving their ego rather than saving the relationship. I agree with you that there are other reason too for relationships fail. As you said, it may seem unreasonable to others but who are we to judge. True.
• Leesburg, Georgia
27 Jan 13
I know in my own marriage the biggest problem we face is money problems. When we are struggling really really bad our stress levels increase and we seem to take it out on each other. We know it's not either of our fault's but we still take our stress out on each other for some reason. We stress about not being able to pay bills, not being able to go out ever, not being able to get food in the house, etc... It is very stressful and it puts problems into our marriage. Now, would we end our marriage over it? Absolutely not. We have been through worse things to do that... But it is hard just the same. That is our biggest problem. Not ego's or not caring enough, nothing like that ever. If we did not have money problems we would have a perfect marriage!
• India
28 Jan 13
I do appreciate your relationships. Good going. That's the way a relationship to be, that's what I think. Sure, economic problems cause troubles in relationships. If your relationship is strong, nothing can affect it at all.
@jugsjugs (13032)
27 Jan 13
I would say that with the way the economic way is going that is a stress factor in any relationship and the strain of that a lone is enough to cause problems. People tend to work more hours at work and see less of each other as they need the money to pay the bills. A lot of people give up to easily on a relationship and there are a lot of things that are a cause to a relationship break up, trust is another issue and stress from children as well.
• India
28 Jan 13
I agree with you that economic issues also cause break up in relationships. Infidelity also causes break ups worldwide. However, ego also plays a big role in many break ups.
@ddaguno (3107)
• Philippines
27 Jan 13
I really don't know why but you are right. Ego is usually the reason for break ups. Petty fights turn into irreconcilable differences and when couples realize that it's just their egos talking it's already too late. Too much have been said that cannot be taken back and the hurt has piled up so they cannot go back to being in love.
• India
28 Jan 13
very true. As you said, petty fights turn into big ones because of this ego. Male ego is most commonly seen all over the world. Women are also carrying it equally in this modern world. Not good at all.
@chiyosan (30197)
• Philippines
11 Feb 13
Well, Yes of course there are many reasons for you to know and realize that the relationship is not working. Ego can form part, but this is most probably common in relationships not made out of love but of convenience. Sorry that i disagree because many people i know who have truly loved have even lost their reason for a time... and for most of them there were no egos showing itself destroying the relationship. Common are infidelity, lack of time and lost of love.
@jenny1015 (13367)
• Philippines
31 Jan 13
When we said our marriage vows, we have completely surrendered the "I, me, myself" part. It should be now as "us or we". But after years of being together, one or both changes their attitude towards each other. Where there was being "selfless", now it has become "selfish". Selfishness is the root of all relationship problems. When we are selfish we think of ourselves first and foremost. We ignore the needs of others and become ego centric. Ego centric people are never easy to live with; they tend to be a drain on relationships. When we are selfish we want the praise, support and backing of others; but, we are not willing to give anything in return.