Inability to trace friends due to silly problem..
By vanny
@vandana7 (98826)
India
February 13, 2013 12:28pm CST
So I am a lady, and had plenty of friends during my school days and college days.
Subsequently, I had a very bad financial period and couldnt bear the thought of my friends pitying me...so I preferred to isolate myself...and now...when I can dare to say hello to them without being pitied, I dont know how to trace them down..
Reason? ...Ladies get married, and change their names...so tracing them is difficult. Given the constraints, can you suggest some methods to track friends from school days?
And do ask your kids and their friends to add their new surname after the existing surname.
Reason? ...Ladies get married, and change their names...so tracing them is difficult. Given the constraints, can you suggest some methods to track friends from school days?
And do ask your kids and their friends to add their new surname after the existing surname.2 people like this
10 responses
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
13 Feb 13
Prashu gave you some great advice. Get a facebook account. Even if the person is married, they also register their maiden name for search purposes. Goodluck little Brownie! Hope you find all your long lost friends and don't ever ever let pride let you isolate you from your friends again!! Sure, they may have taken some pity on your situation but mostly they probably would have made those darker days a whole lot brighter. And who knows, maybe they went through some tough times themselves and could have used a good friend like you. 
1 person likes this
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
18 Mar 13
You know you love us blond people. We do have our place in the world for you brownie people as much as you hate to admit it. On a more serious note...I don't go back to those days either. The friends that were worth keeping are still in my life and the others, well, we have grown apart and changed so much that it would never be the same as it was.
@vandana7 (98826)
• India
16 Mar 13
You are a darling...even though you are a blond. :) I did contact one girl I knew almost 43 years ago...but you know what...we had a very stiff conversation...we had nothing much to talk about...:( We've forgotten our teachers and many of the friends...:( So I am not going back to that era...
@Janey1966 (24170)
• Carlisle, England
13 Feb 13
It is frustrating trying to track down women that we know are 99.9% married..and in my case I have no idea what that new surname would be. When I was blogging my 1988 diary I thought I would come across the surname of 'Alan' a guy my best friend at the time was dating and got pregnant by. I am absolutely certain they would've got married but my diary gave me no clues. To this day I have no idea of my friend's surname..only her maiden name of course.
I wish you luck in your search.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85135)
• Shingle Springs, California
15 Feb 13
I wouldn't be surprised if my girls don't change their last name.
Over here you would have Classmates.com to track people down. Over there, not sure.
@vandana7 (98826)
• India
18 Feb 13
I responded to this...and out went myLot..lol.
So I too ran away..lol
Anyway...we dont have classmates.com. And I am inclined to believe that many of my classmates may not be using computers. In any event, surnames are an issue..
If your girls use name + maiden name + husband's surname...I dont think it would be bad...why should we lose our surname in the first place...I object.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85135)
• Shingle Springs, California
18 Feb 13
I didn't change mine. Why change it at all?
@vandana7 (98826)
• India
18 Feb 13
I think even guys need to change...
For a girl...getting married...
Her Christian name followed by maiden name, and then the guy's surname
and for the guy
His Christian name followed by surname, and then the maiden name of his wife.
If not for anything, at least data management will be easier, right? lol
1 person likes this
I cannot help you Vandy, so sorry... I just wish you are successful in tracking them...
@jenny1015 (13366)
• Philippines
14 Feb 13
I was also out of touch with the rest of my high school friends for more than 15 years. And it was only through Facebook was I able to track them down.
@vandana7 (98826)
• India
18 Mar 13
Grown too far apart actually..:( I mean, the songs of those days were different, the conversations were different, we spoke about our teachers and matrons..most of our conversations were about those things. It was a stilted stuff...felt bad that we couldnt talk much...except where are you now, what are you doing, how many kids, what are they doing...beyond that..full stop. :(
@jenny1015 (13366)
• Philippines
16 Mar 13
It would be a bit awkward really after being astray for sometime. But it is always good to start by reminiscing the times that you were together and then ask what has happened for the last 43 years. I am sure you would have lots of stories to share with them as well.
@prashu228 (37526)
• India
13 Feb 13
Hi
Try to search your school and college sites in orkut and facebook . I met some of my friends with whom i lost contact through orkut . Some students created a group with our school name and we can trace people from any year if they joined there. I am sure some of your class mates would have created any group by your school name in orkut or facebook or any other site. Try it.
1 person likes this
@thesids (22180)
• Bhubaneswar, India
14 Feb 13
I agree. I have found 2 of such friends on FB. And trust me, I did not search for them. They were suggested to me because they were friends with my other friends. FB is really good to find old friends.
@cutepenguin (6431)
• Canada
14 Feb 13
Sometimes the key is to find one of them - I friended one high school friend on facebook, and she was friends with several other of our friends from high school. So that made it easy, as some of them hadn't changed their name after they got married or hadn't gotten married.
Were any of the people in your group of friends male? Or had brothers? Because you could probably find the brother of one of your friends and get your friend's contact information from him.
@BarBaraPrz (45487)
• St. Catharines, Ontario
13 Feb 13
Does your college have an alumni association?
Your one liners are the highlight of the day mel..
