He's playing with people's feelings

Penrith, Australia
February 22, 2013 9:44am CST
I have this guy friend, and he has a girl. They aren't technically together but the girl is deeply madly in love with him. He doesn't really like the girl but he makes her believe that he loves her. I was trying to make him feel that what he was doing was wrong but he doesn't see it. He says, he's not really in a relationship so he's not cheating on anyone, and today is the girl's birthday, its not right to tell her the truth that he doesn't really love her. He thinks she's lucky to have him as she has someone to think about before she sleeps. I think its just mean, the girl probably gets really sad when he doesn't talk to her and everything. I think he's wasting her time as he doesn't really like the girl. Oh okay, the truth is, I'm hurt because i had feelings for this guy friend and i thought he felt the same, but now that im hearing all this crap, i cant help but think that he probably lied when he said he loved me then. Ugh. I hate him i am so pissed. I hate it even more that he thinks what he does is okay. Or is it?
2 people like this
16 responses
@jenny1015 (13366)
• Philippines
23 Feb 13
Such conceited man! I don't think you would ever stay long in a relationship with a person like that. Don't let yourself be in love with the guy. Not worth it.
@chiyosan (30184)
• Philippines
23 Feb 13
i agree with you jenny on this. ha be careful really not to fall for someone like this, its a disaster from the beginning. better to just stay away from this person than to fall for him and its going to be too late.
• Penrith, Australia
23 Feb 13
Too bad it is too late chiyosan, as i already had strong feelings for him before. I was just able to move on from it because he just suddenly told me that he lost interest in me. I accepted it as i thought to myself that falling out of love was normal, sometimes its all chemical, you love them and then you don't. It isn't anybody's fault, but now, i understand that I've been played and he really didnt care on the first place.
• Penrith, Australia
23 Feb 13
You are so right Jenny! He is so full of himself! He thinks he's so great and he's a keeper and everything. But he is a jerk.
@johndur (3052)
• Pasig, Philippines
22 Feb 13
well just think that your are so lucky toknow him this early or else you might also fall in his trap of playing womens feelings.i think it is much better to tell the girl what this guy feels about her to stop everything before it all gets out of hand.
@johndur (3052)
• Pasig, Philippines
23 Feb 13
Too bad.I just hope that the girl won't get pregnant.maybe you should start making some distance between you and the boy.its not good to have a company like that.
• Penrith, Australia
23 Feb 13
I am definitely working on keeping distance. I hope she doesn't get preganant too. That would be worst case scenario lol. Especially with a guy who doesn't really care about her or anyone else but themselves.
• Penrith, Australia
23 Feb 13
I think it has gotten out of hand as the girl is actually saving for a trip they could go together, i pity the girl so much she is still young. I think it is too late as i was in the trap before that girl, I'm just so pissed that he just probably played on me too without me knowing.
• United States
24 Feb 13
Dump him , delete his phone and stay out of any thing to do with him. Find some new friends. You might even want to change your sym card, and only give your new nuer to your true frienbds.
• United States
25 Feb 13
My picture is there page because i have face bookpage , and i write for experts column.
• Penrith, Australia
27 Feb 13
I see, i think they used your picture when expertscolumn crashed. It was technically everywhere, it was even the expertscolumn icon for my articles. Nice to meet you.
• Penrith, Australia
25 Feb 13
That's probably what i am really supposed to do. Thanks. By the way, i see your picture a lot, not here though, its on Facebook and expertscolumn. I dont know why kind sir.
• Philippines
28 Feb 13
Playing with other people's feeling will never be okay. It's one of the worst thing to do with someone who give all their trust to the other. Well, whatever the reasons behind why he did all these, it's still not enough to hurt people. He had to be man enough and stand up to tell the truth on what he truly feels.
• Penrith, Australia
12 Mar 13
Thats right, it takes a lot for someone to trust someone with their feelings and emotions, and when you do that, you give the person the power to make you happy and to hurt you as well, and there is nothing worse than the feeling of being lead on, that just sucks, and no one deserves to be hurt just for a lost cause of another,
@MissBlack (356)
• United States
22 Feb 13
It is wrong. He is going to get all kinds of karma payback for what he is doing to that girl. I know a guy right now who has a woman and tries to deny it to me. She obviously wants to keep him because she does whatever he says (just spent $700 on a PS3 for him) It is not okay for anyone to lie about caring about anyone. The worst feeling in the world will be if/when she finds out he doesn't love her. Don't take it upon yourself to tell her what he is doing. Truth always comes out at the best time. He will get his for what he is doing to her. I could've told this girl about how all of a sudden he wants to be a good man since her tax money came and gone but chose to stay out of it. Another thing to consider, people only do what you allow them to do. She has a hand in her own heartbreak too.
• Penrith, Australia
23 Feb 13
Oh wow. 700$?!? Geez. It is really tempting to get matters done on him with my own hands,but you're right, I'll just let karma do the trick. That's right, nobody wants to be lead on and thats exactly what he is doing to all the nice girls. I told him that i kind of hate him because of what he is doing but he doesn't seem to mind, she probably knew he was trouble too. Hmm, i admit, maybe i had little subtle hints too, i just chose to ignore them.
• Penrith, Australia
23 Feb 13
Oh they have 4 children.. That jerk guy, i hate him, has 4 kids but still plays with a ps3, its hard when kids are involved. Too bad she brought this on to her self. It is so sad.
• United States
23 Feb 13
Yup. I watched him track her tax money all that evening and when it came, she didn't even know. He made her go with him to the mall that very night and spend $700 on a PS3 and all these extra parts. This is before she got anything for herself or their four children. I could've probably said something but I opted not to simply because she is happy to have him. Despite the lying and cheating and him telling her to her face that he plans to 'get his off the top' on every single one of her paydays. See, people only do what you let them. I really do feel bad for the girl. I feel bad for anybody who is being used and lied to. I know the feeling and when it finally sets in, its a pain that can cause a lot of damage in the long-run...
@blackrusty (3519)
• Mexico
22 Feb 13
what he is doing is wrong on so many levels and people like this just make me sick now i dont want to be a man basher as i am a man but he needs to man up and deal with it so the time to heal and move on can happen i truly feel sorry about this but on to the other side of this women are just as bad at doing this as well
• Penrith, Australia
23 Feb 13
Well i just found out yesterday that he was a player. I didnt really know until then and i am so pissed. He did apologize to me for liking me even though he wasnt really over with his ex yet. But they've broken up so long ago, i think he just uses her as a reason, ugh. Do you think He just does that?
• Penrith, Australia
23 Feb 13
I kind of agree that its the woman's fault as well as they probably wouldn't be jerks if they hadn't experienced a jerk before. But its not all the girls fault, just because on girl made him into a jerk doesn't make the new girl bad too. Poor girl probably didnt even know that the guy was a jerk.
• Mexico
23 Feb 13
sad to say there are people like that
@yogeshdhusa (2236)
• India
23 Feb 13
Hi, I think you should teach him a lesson, i would say he is not worth having you and your love and honesty!! however still if you wish to teach him a lesson get a better guy then him and make him feel that he has lost a gem from his life. Otherwise forget all and move on and be happy!!
• Penrith, Australia
23 Feb 13
That could work too, but then I'd be getting a guy i dont really like and dont have feelings for. Then I'd be like him.
@dawnald (85129)
• Shingle Springs, California
22 Feb 13
Of course it's not OK, he should be honest with her even if it hurts so that she can get on with her life and find somebody who does care about her.
• Penrith, Australia
23 Feb 13
That's right i perfectly agree that they are wasting each others time, they should drop each other so they can find the persons they both deserve. I dont understand what benefit he actually gets from doing these stuff to nice sincere girls.
@cupkitties (7421)
• United States
22 Feb 13
He knows it's not okay. He doesn't care. All he knows in his young mind is "All I have to do is say three magic words "I love you" and I've got these girls doing what I want". This is why it is the actions, not necessarily words that'll let you know a persons true feelings. Even then you still gotta watch out because very few, but some still can play off both those factors pretty darn well.
• Penrith, Australia
23 Feb 13
That is so right, you are so right. He doesn't care. I wish i thought about that. It really pisses me off that he is so selfish. They do he does. I thought he really cared. Oh my goodness. My eyes are open now
@machatago (385)
• Philippines
25 Feb 13
Hmmm, I don't know how to respond on this honestly, but I think that if he doesn't actually like the girl, he should have told her in the first place. If that is the case then I think you should avoid him as he will have a tendency to hurt your feelings too. It's good that you caught him early, I think you have to just move on and find nice guy that is deserving for you.
• Penrith, Australia
27 Feb 13
I think so too, as it was unfair of him to leave her on. No one likes to be lead on, i think its the worst feeling in the world. Its weird how the person we care about has the power to take control of our feelings, he has the power to hurt us and mess with our emotions, but the heart wants what it wants and what can we do about that? i wish i do find a better guy. For some reason, i feel though that no one will be in tune with me as they are. Its difficult.
• Valdosta, Georgia
27 Feb 13
I think it is most definitely wrong what your friend is doing to this girl. That is awful... At the same time, how can she not know he doesn't actually like her? I mean, if a guy only talked to me when they felt like it I would move on and find someone who wanted to spend time with me. I don't understand how she cannot figure out what the guy is doing... She should have more self respect and find someone who treats her the way she should be treated. If she wants the "bad boy" then that is what she got and she should deal with the heart break when it comes. I have never had an interest in the bad boy type because I KNEW I would get treated badly and I was not interested in that... If someone never had time for me, was ashamed of being seen with me, or anything like that I would walk away. As for you have feelings for him, I really hope you don't have feelings for him now after seeing how he treats women. If he treats one girl this way, there is nothing to say he won't treat you the same!
• Penrith, Australia
27 Feb 13
You're right, we get treated as to how we let other people treat us. Its probably because she is so young and she thought that this is the kind of love she deserves, maybe she feels that negative attention is better than no attention at all. Although, i think she has a clue, but its not strong enough for her to let him go . On my part, i think i got challenged by the guy because as they say, the chase is always the best part. It will be a lesson for me and for her, hopefully we don't make the same mistakes again.
@WakeUpKitty (8694)
• Netherlands
23 Feb 13
Let it go! this is not of your business. Many men think they are a lot out of the lottery and you should be happy to be their gf or bf. If you think he lied to you tell him straight ahead and again: let it go. sooner or later he will meet someone who will dump him! And you go on with your life.
• Penrith, Australia
23 Feb 13
That's right, he's wasting his time and the poor girls time, he shouldn't waste my time too. Gosh, it seems like so many men are really conceited. I was wondering who made him this way and i was thinking that maybe i could fix him, but, hmmm. I now see that it is hopeless.
@Raine38 (12258)
• United States
22 Feb 13
That's a bit tough. Because you have feelings for him and most likely you are acting out of your own feelings. But at least you know better than to actually fall for him again. And unlike you, the girl is so unlucky enough not to know the real color of the guy. I know that what he's doing is very bad. But if he doesn't want to listen, I guess you just have to back down and let him learn his lesson the hard way. Karma will bite him sooner and later and he will realize the error of his ways.
• Penrith, Australia
23 Feb 13
Maybe i am acting out of my feelings. And I'd be honest that he is so good in talking to women. Well, i was able to get over him and then we started talking again, i do my best not too like him at all and i try to keep him off of my mind but sometimes it gets really really hard. I will try to calm own as i have this really big urge to punch him in the face.
• India
23 Feb 13
When you know that guy does not love that girl and lies to her, and you are agree he is playing with feeling of that girl, then do not you think you are also share in that sin when you know and you have just kept quiete? when finally that girl will know the fact and maybe will hurt and tell you why you did not say it to me that time? I have experience something same, the man who is my husband before marriage and after was in relationship with another girls and when I left my everything, and we registered our marriage that guy told me about the fact and even about that he loves me, I stop talking to that guy and from that time I could not forgive him because if he was saying to me in the starting that my man is in habit of relationship with another ladies then I could kickk him out my life and not be in this hell that now I am. so did he not responsibile for destroying my life?
@stealthy (8181)
• United States
22 Feb 13
I have to say as a guy that I have never understood why so many girls fall the bad guy who will mistreat them. For the most part I think I have been a nice guy. I never strung any girl along that I didn't like. If I went out with a girl and discovered I didn't much like them, then I didn't ask them out again. I have broken off relationships when I either thought there was no real future or when I met someone else. I have always tried to be honest. This has meant that there have been many girls who I thought I might like but they never gave me a chance because I wasn't one of the bad guys who would lie to get what they wanted and then dump or cheat on the girl.
• Penrith, Australia
23 Feb 13
I dont know why either but then on my side, well i didnt really know that he was a player. I really believed that he had feelings for me. and then one day he just messages me "hey, i have to be honest with you, but ever since blah blah, i lost interest in you."
• Poland
22 Feb 13
It's ok to date a girl and don't be in serious relationship with her as long as everything is clear and they both don't treat it seriously. That guy is deceiving the girl and he doesn't seem to care that he's going to hurt her. It's so unfair. But that girl should have already notice it. It's sad how love - something that supposed to be a positive thing - makes us blind and causes damage to our hearts. I hate guys like him cause they make you feel stupid for loving someone.
• Penrith, Australia
23 Feb 13
That's true, he really doesn't seem to care. The girl is even sending him stuff to his house. She is madly deeply in love with him, she even introduced him to her parents. Ohh, i hate him so much. He prides himself of being a keeper but he is a jerk!! sorry for acting like this, I'm just really upset.