Don't tell me I can't do it!
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
United States
March 12, 2013 12:06pm CST
I like going for walks. I hadn't been in awhile because of the cold. I can never get my daughter to go when I want to go. And when she does walk with me she wants to only walk the easy route. I wanted to walk the big hill. She says 'you can't walk that big hill! I can hardly walk it myself'. Well, she stayed home to sit in her recliner and I set the timer on my phone and left the house. I started up my street and did not turn to go on the easy road. Those hills are nothing. I kept going and went to the road with the big hills. The first hill is about 40 degrees upward. I had to kind of push myself along with my cane. Then going down the hill was more of a slope of 30 degrees. Then there was another big hill at about 40 degrees again. Then it comes down to another road that takes me back to my road. That road was so steep. It was more than 45 degrees. I took baby steps down it and kept my cane in front of me to help brace me. I made the complete walk in 44 minutes.
I decided to take this harder walk because the other route isn't challenging enough for me. It doesn't make me sweat. This walk made me sweat and it was still rather cold out. I wore my hoodie, and before too long I had to zip it up. I must say I had a really good time on my walk. I had my Golden Oldies playing on my iPhone. I just got lost in the music and kept on trucking myself up those hills.
I think about in August when I came home from having complications after surgery. I was bound to a wheelchair and walker. I had to wear oxygen in the bathtub even to bathe. My daughter had to care for me like I was a baby. And now I can walk a really difficult route. I'm not sure how far it is but I know it's over a mile. It takes me twice as long to walk it than the easy route.
Do you ever push yourself to do more? I want to speed up my metabolism, so it's important to push myself. Does anyone try to tell you that you can't do something?
5 people like this
19 responses
@peavey (16936)
• United States
12 Mar 13
Good for you! I remember when you came home from the hospital and could hardly do anything. You've made a lot of progress. Walking is the best overall exercise, they say.
I have a stubborn streak so that if anyone tells me I can't do something, I'll do it just to prove that I can. I suspect you have that same streak. 
3 people like this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
12 Mar 13
Yes. I don't like being limited either. People tell me I can't do something only annoys me and makes me want to do it to show them I can do it.
1 person likes this
@Raine38 (12257)
• United States
12 Mar 13
That's good for you. I am glad you have recovered and it seems to me that you are doing much better than before. I like walking too but have postponed the activity because of the cold. But now, the weather is a bit warmer I think I am ready to resume my workout/activity. I just wish I have someone like you to go with me. I am not doing a lot lately but come August I will be busy once more.
Anyway, I got told before by my good friends at that that I can't do something, too expensive, too risky, too ambitious. I have to admit that I am not expecting those words from them. But I feel like I would miss a lot more if I wouldn't even try. I did try and I did it. And those friends? Well, never even congratulated me. Makes me think now what's really their agenda for shooting down my dreams. From now on, I am careful as to whom I discuss my plans with.
2 people like this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
12 Mar 13
Keep on with your plans. I think it's wise what you said about being careful of who you share your plans with.
@BarBaraPrz (45475)
• St. Catharines, Ontario
12 Mar 13
Good for you!
Boo! to your daughter, both for discouraging you and for not going out herself.
I just came in from a walk myself. (I had to go to the pharmacy to get my meds.) Not nearly as pleasant a day as on the weekend, but at least it wasn't raining like yesterday.
2 people like this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
12 Mar 13
She has a bout if back pain, so I don't push her. She is gaining weight though, and that only exacerbates the problem. I'm not going to be held back cuz she won't go with me. She goes with her hubby some evenings when he takes the dog for a walk.
@leateagee (3667)
• China
12 Mar 13
What a great determination you have there! I am happy for your fast recovery. Not a lot of people have a strong willed personality like you. Well, a lot of people did tell me that I can't reach and do a lot of things in life, but they are wrong. I used their words to push me harder to become where and who I am now. I am in a thankful for their comments. 
2 people like this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
12 Mar 13
You know, I guess we should thank those people for pushing us on by their negativity, yes?
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
13 Mar 13
no they are always telling me i can do more if i try. they dont realise i try all the time to do more and more. yet at times i feel im going to just fall flat on the floor when im pushing myself. i dont understand it
there are days when i can just go all day, doing more and more. then i will have 2 or 3 awful days where im lucky if i can get up and down. 
i wish like you, they would find out whats wrong and fix it for me, so i can move on from there like you have. i commend you. you have really got a strong way about you. you work hard to get better and have accomplished so much. you are quite a great lady!
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
13 Mar 13
Have you been to a doctor Bun? You may have chronic fatigue syndrome or fibromyalgia. I'm lucky to not have any of that. I was dependent on O2 all the time and now I just use it as necessary. When I take the cpap off in the night I am supposed to put the oxygen on. I forget most times though.
@echoforever (5180)
• United States
13 Mar 13
Oh you should take your time to do what you can but don't push so hard you feel like you'll fall down.
1 person likes this
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
13 Mar 13
yes i have been to numerous doctors. they all give me tests that come back ok.
but dont think ive found one that believes in fibro. once yrs ago i had one that said that but i had to move and have not found another. one of my friends said i probably have chronic fatigue but my daughter says i just dont get enough rest. but to me it seems thats all i do. except sleep.
i know i dont get enough of that. maybe when i get my bed moved back with my tv
room
but dont think ive found one that believes in fibro. once yrs ago i had one that said that but i had to move and have not found another. one of my friends said i probably have chronic fatigue but my daughter says i just dont get enough rest. but to me it seems thats all i do. except sleep. i know i dont get enough of that. maybe when i get my bed moved back with my tv room
@natliegleb (5175)
• India
13 Mar 13
it is a big snub on their face and later they will feel and repent for the bad things which they have done
1 person likes this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
16 Mar 13
Today I didn't go walk but I did a lot of house chores. I loved all the kitchen furniture to do a good sweep and mop of the floor. It was more than the usual sweep and mop. I wanted to get rid of all the obsticles. Then I put everything back. I also cleaned the laundry room and the washer and drier. I swept the patio and the driveway too.
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
13 Mar 13
It's not bad. They just care about me and don't think I can do things when I think I can. And I know what my tolerance is.
@echoforever (5180)
• United States
13 Mar 13
As long as you know that tolerance, keep going for it.
1 person likes this
@lingli_78 (12822)
• Australia
12 Mar 13
i don't like people telling me i can't do something as well... it will make me more determine to do it just for the sake of showing them that i can actually do it... i can see that you are a very determine person and i'm glad that you are recovering fast... take care and have a nice day...
1 person likes this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
13 Mar 13
It took awhile to get back to normal and even better than normal. I may not walk today and pick it up tomorrow. I'm letting my body rest and recover. I walked again last night on the easier route.
@winterose (39887)
• Canada
14 Mar 13
yes but I don't take risks, what if you had fallen, somebody should be with you.
1 person likes this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
16 Mar 13
Couldn't get her to go with me. S said she should get up and go with me for that reason.
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
12 Mar 13
Awesome!! I hope that when you got home that you thanked your daughter for that! My mother was a very negative person and always told me that I could not do this or that and that I would never make it on my own etc etc. As a kid it drove me nuts. As I got older, her negativity just distanced me from her and as I matured, I was able to look back and thank her for it. I was so driven to prove her wrong that I did. Had she coddled me and all, I'm not sure that I would have turned out the same. I'm pretty sure that I would not have. In your case, I am sure that your daughter just really cares about you but I also think that you are more driven than your daughter. My girls are all fitness nuts so they would of reacted different than your daughter. They might have tried to talk me out of it if I'd had the same health issues that you had but in the end, they know how stubborn I am. They'd have walked with me. A couple of years ago, we went to some historic ruins nearby. It was a planned adventure on a warm day in May. When we got there, we discovered some hiking trails. OMG!! Talk about a workout!! I had flip flops on and I have asthma but I was determined. It was not a huge hill but pretty big and rough terrain and did I mention the dam flip flops? We made it, the girls got a bit concerned about half way through the journey as my breathing was a bit sketchy. I now keep a pair of sneakers in the trunk of my car just in case. NEVER EVER HIKE IN FLIP FLOPS!!!
1 person likes this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
12 Mar 13
Hi Sid! Oh man! Flip flops could break and you could stumble and fall! I'm so happy that didn't happen to you. My daughter is eating a cup of lemon ice cream with cookies in it. (One of Blue Bell's new flavors). She has gained. I'm only 25 pounds heavier than her! She used to be a size 8 and over the years she gained to wear a 2x. It breaks my heart. I can't motivate her. Maybe if she sees me get smaller than her she will begin trying.
I wish my daughter was more like your daughters in that respect. I think if I weigh less than her and get smaller than her she will pay attention. That's my hope!
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
13 Mar 13
Oh, geez, PQ. I really don't want to get into insulting your daughter. 2X is actually a big jump from size 8. She really should get out and walk with you for her own good and also to be there for you if you run into trouble. That being said, we all know . about "shoulds". why bother. Your daughter will find her own way and you will yours. My oldest daughter is a size 10 and desperatly tries to lose weight. She is beautiful as she is. The problem in our family is that her 3 sisters are all size 00 to 3 and I am a size 5. Her cousins are all the same. My nephew and her just happened to get the large genes in the family. They are not huge but just in comparison they are much larger. Still...they work out. I think your daughter should know that it is ok to be larger but she should be fit?? I hope that makes sense. I'm so afraid of offending...last thing want to do.
@artemeis (4194)
• China
13 Mar 13
I have nothing against walking but I am concern about your pushing yourself to walk that much after having just recovered from your recent bout of sickness. I would like to believe that you know what you are doing here.
I am for taking it according to your physical capability and condition where you have to avoid causing injury or aggravation to yourself. Do approach your exercises with all sensibilities and logic.
All the best to your recovery.
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
13 Mar 13
I was sick last July and August Artemis. I had the beginnings of gangrene in my gallbladder. It was rotten and came out in pieces because it was so necrosed. I am much better now. I walked again last night at 7 pm. I took the easy route because my body was not yet recovered from the big walk.
I may hold off walking today and do the big walk tomorrow. It felt good to push myself.
@celticeagle (158876)
• Boise, Idaho
12 Mar 13
I remember how bad you were and how far you have come too. I am so happy for you. And 44 minutes is a good time. I used to push myself but i don't any more. I used to jog 7.5 miles a day. We lived right by the greenbelt and I would run either with my husband or by myself. I weight 110 pounds then. Now I am probably 3xs that weight and I just don't care. In 2009 I gave it my all. I was going to the Y every day and doing a couple hours of exercise daily. Well that was when my friend betrayed me and the man I thought was the one for me let me down. I came home from staying with my friend in a nearby town. A month after I got back she accused me of stealing from her. I had known her for 35 years! Had stayed at her house before. To accuse me of stealing hurt me more than I can describe. And then to have the man I thought was the one for me and what he did to me. I haven't been the same since all of that went down. Needless to say I am not a theif and to be accused by someone I prized as my #2 friend in all the world hurt me to the core. I have just quit trying. I never got over that or the guy. And one day I just woke up and quit going to the Y, quit putting on make up, quit washing for that matter. I was broken hearted. I think about being healthy sometimes. But I'd rather eat a piece of chocolate. Fate will figure when its time and if all I have are my family , my #1 friend and BFF that I can really count on then that is fine with me. I dont try to be attractive or thin anymore. I just don't care.
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (158876)
• Boise, Idaho
14 Mar 13
She did a half assed apology and then in nearly the same breath she made comments like 'if you did' and such that told me she still thought I had done this. It hurt me to the core. I told her if you really believe this then why would you want me as a friend. Why attempt this again?
I'm not happy being obese either. And I am done with men. It would take one heck of a guy to ever interest me. I just don't care. And no one seems to really care that I don't care. My family, friends, etc. And so I am happy with it. I would rather eat something fattening and with zero nutrition than put forth any energy to try to change how I am. And, to be honest, being fat and unappealing helps keep people at bay too. Because I have been hurt by this guy I cared so much for I don't want to let anyone else in to maybe do it again. And its easier to just eat whatever I want that to battle those feelings of hurt, shame, etc.
I am happy that you want your health and to lose weight. I just don't care anymore coupled with my severe depression it really makes it hard to change how I feel. I think that personality helps a person too and you certainly have a pleasant one. I wish you well and know you can reach your goal.
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
13 Mar 13
I'm sorry you had to go through all that Celticeagle. Your friend should have known you better than that. I bet your friend never apologized either. She probably found what was gone and never apologized. I would hate to be in your position with a friend accusing me of something like that. I'd probably be scarred for life.
I have a need and a want to be healthy. I am not doing it in hopes of finding love or anything. If it were to happen, I would be shocked. At this stage in my life in happy as I am but I'm not happy being obese. I've lost a lot with with my gain my net loss is just 122 pounds. I still have some gained weight to lose still. Then I want to work on losing fresh weight. I want to get down to 160 or 170. My brother has lost 160 pounds. His daughter lost 100 pounds. I can't just pretend to be happy with my weight when I'm not. I care what I look like. I still do wear minimal makeup. I go out from time to time and I care about looking as best that I can.
I'm lucky my cheating husband didn't scar me for life. My grief controlled my self image but it doesn't anymore. I know I'm no raving beauty, but I've been told I'm not hard to look at.
1 person likes this
@much2say (53959)
• Los Angeles, California
16 Mar 13
You go, girl! As long as you know your body and limits, I think it's great you challenge yourself and push yourself a little more. Afterall, you really don't know your limits until you try, right? Perhaps your daughter is thinking of your "safety" and doesn't want you to overdo it. But hey, it'd be good for her to try too (if she is able) instead of giving up from the get go. Believe me, I'm at a point in my life that I need to push myself more with everything - not that I'm lazy, but I've let a lot of things "go". Yah, I've been told all my childhood that I couldn't be all the things I wanted to become when I grew up because of XYZ . . . I especially wanted to be a working artist, but everyone in my family said artists don't make money . . . well . . . guess what I became! 1 person likes this
@much2say (53959)
• Los Angeles, California
16 Mar 13
See, now I need to push myself to work around the house (one of the things I let go at times - sometimes there seems to be no time with 2 young ones running about!!). So good for you for doing that - I'm sure it felt good - and made your home look great!!
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
16 Mar 13
I'm so glad that you did reach your dream. Yes I know my body's limitations. I didn't walk today. I did a lot of work inside and outside the house. It felt good.
@Janey1966 (24170)
• Carlisle, England
12 Mar 13
I got really got hot and bothered using my extendable paint roller yesterday, does that count?
At first I thought I'd not accomplished much painting my bedroom ceiling but when I looked at it again today after it drying for a few hours I'm really quite proud of myself.
Who needs men?
Brilliant walk you did there. Did you do it without the oxygen tank thingy you've used in the past? If you did, well, that's even better!
At first I thought I'd not accomplished much painting my bedroom ceiling but when I looked at it again today after it drying for a few hours I'm really quite proud of myself.
Who needs men?
Brilliant walk you did there. Did you do it without the oxygen tank thingy you've used in the past? If you did, well, that's even better!1 person likes this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
12 Mar 13
Hi Janey! Oh you did plenty! All that reaching and climbing ladders is a lot. That is one chore I could not do. I can't keep my arms over my head. I had shoulder surgery for arthritis but I'm still not able to paint. Some days I can't brush my hair very well.
I'm only using oxygen now as needed. No I don't take the portable oxygen anymore. I used it a couple of times last week for an hour or so when I suddenly got short of breath. If I eat something that doesn't agree with me I will get dumping syndrome. It makes me very short if breath. Mostly I'm good now. Thanks for asking.
Take care Janey. Have a great evening.
@catchpazuzu (99)
• Portugal
12 Mar 13
I like to push myself more... to the limit, really, within reason. You can't do it? You can do everything you put your mind into. It0s what makes you better.
1 person likes this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
12 Mar 13
I agree! Pushing yourself to the next level can surely be good for our health. To say I can't do this or that without even trying is self limiting. Of course there are exceptions. There are people confined to wheelchairs and the like. Even then some of those people can still move some parts of their bodies.
@34momma (13882)
• United States
12 Mar 13
You have to push yourself. You have to be your own best motoviator!! I love walking! I love taking long power walks with my music on. Just walking 20 minutes one way then turning around and coming back. We have to learn to be able to take care of ourselves.
We can do anything we put our minds too it! I am always pushing myself to do more and be better!!
@RitterSport (2451)
• Lippstadt, Germany
23 Mar 13
Dearest PQ thats really an amazing progress you made in such a short time.
Hope you are able to keep it up though your daughter tries to discourage you.
I started walking to the station about 6 weeks ago, its almost half an hour to walk to the station plus in the evening after work the same half an hour back home. Of course I have a little extra money with me to be able to take a cab if its raining or my feet are plain hurting and very tired in the evening, but I didnt need the cab as often as I thought I would so thats good.
I am also feeling much better now doing these walks. Initially I had sort of doubted I could do that long term cause my feet hurt a lot and its painful when I start walking after I have been sitting for quite a while or resting in bed. but I am able to walk that far every morning and most of the evenings so thats really good for me.
@echoforever (5180)
• United States
13 Mar 13
Good for you! Its good to be careful though if you're feeling weak or something like that but when you're feeling good and want to push yourself there's no reason why you shouldn't. From what you said your daughter just wants to take care of you but now you're doing well. She should be proud.
@Hopefull90 (921)
• United States
12 Mar 13
It is much easier for me to take a walk if I go by myself. I can go at my own speed.
1 person likes this
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
12 Mar 13
You got the BR by mistake, . My finger hit the link on the phone. I don't give them out often.
Yes, I agree with you that walking by yourself is actually better. I don't have to keep up with anyone and I don't have to feel like I'm holding anyone back.
. My finger hit the link on the phone. I don't give them out often.
Yes, I agree with you that walking by yourself is actually better. I don't have to keep up with anyone and I don't have to feel like I'm holding anyone back.1 person likes this
@TLilly12 (1229)
• United States
12 Mar 13
I am glad you enjoy your walk,I went to the doctor, to have blood test done, they told me the lab tech wasn't in today, and go to the hospital, to have the blood work done, so I walked over to the hospital, had the blood work done, and then I remembered I needed, to call my medication in, so I walked back over the the building,to call my medication in ,then I had to walk back over to the hospital to wait for my sister, to take me back home, I was out of breath, and it was raining outside to, and when I got home I walked to the store near my house, I was really tired walking to the store and back home, I get out of breath too easy now.
