Don't Should Your Life Away
By Val
@valmnz (17095)
New Zealand
September 24, 2015 12:45am CST
I was doing something once that I didn't really want to do and expressed to a friend I didn't really want to be there. She asked me why I was, then. I said it was because I thought I should do it, it was expected of me.
She looked at me with horror. "Don't should your life away," she said.
I've remembered those words, even though that event was nearly twenty years ago.
Life is short. So much of our time is spent in doing those things others expect us to do. Sometimes those things are responsibilities we can't avoid, but there are other times when we do have choices. The situation I was in was one of my own choosing. I was doing it for all the wrong reasons.
So, how about you? Do you do things where you have a choice because you feel you should? Or because you want to?
I've learnt to do the latter.
9 people like this
11 responses
@Rollo1 (16676)
• Boston, Massachusetts
24 Sep 15
I guess it depends on the activity. I should do dishes and don't want to, but eventually we won't have any clean dishes so I both should and must. But other types of activities have harsher consequences if left undone. And yes, I do all sorts of things I don't want to do, and others don't feel the "should" the way I do, so I do their "shoulds" too.
2 people like this
@sueznewz2 (10409)
• Alicante, Spain
24 Sep 15
I like that AnjaP,... others don't feel the should the way you do... well said, 
I find myself it that place sometimes too...
I find myself it that place sometimes too...
@allknowing (153530)
• India
24 Sep 15
When we are dependent on others I suppose that becomes necessary. I am not plagued by any of those things now.
1 person likes this
@allknowing (153530)
• India
25 Sep 15
@valmnz You said that it was expected of you. Whoever expected you to do it may be you wanted to please them for whatever reason.
1 person likes this
@thesids (22180)
• Bhubaneswar, India
24 Sep 15
I do it both ways. There are quite higher chances of me ending up doing something just because someone expects me to do it - this of course comes with a tag - how doable it is within my constraints.
I have a very few people (4 or 5) who expect me to do things for them, and I also know I cannot fulfill all their expectations today. As such, I feel it important to attend and meet their expectations - as much as I can.
And of course, things that I would want to do, too at times are left undone in case they can cause a harm to someone else.
1 person likes this
@glenniah (1197)
• Mandurah, Australia
24 Sep 15
I often do it because I think I should, however I am trying to learn to do the things I want to do and be where I want to be.
@softbabe44 (5815)
• Vancouver, Washington
25 Sep 15
i agree don't should your life away the other things are important just as some of the others
@OneOfMany (12150)
• United States
25 Sep 15
I pick and choose. Then I am told how I really should have helped out though I was happy avoiding something that wasn't completely necessary.
@sueznewz2 (10409)
• Alicante, Spain
24 Sep 15
I'm guilty of doing some things because I feel I should do them... but I have to say ... it is less and less these days... I am getting better at doing more of the things I want to do.... but there are times when someone should do something... and that is the time when I do something because it should be done... and it seems that no one else is going to do it... lol's
but there are times when someone should do something... and that is the time when I do something because it should be done... and it seems that no one else is going to do it... lol's1 person likes this
