I Had No Relations with THAT Woman
By Gus Kilthau
@Ceerios (4698)
Goodfellow, Texas
October 31, 2016 7:45pm CST
I Had No Relations with THAT Woman -
That's right. I confess that I did have relations with her front lawn, with her nice big automobile, with her kids at Hallowe'en, but none with herself (or with her mean pit bull either).
No uncles, aunts, brothers, sisters, just flat no relations.
In my place there are just two of us. We got related when the preacher guy said we were related.
(Believe preacher guys and you will beleve just about anyone, right?)
Anyway, tonight is the night when all of the neighbor kids come around and beat on our front door.
"Give us some candy, or we will yank out your flowers and throw eggs at your house.
Nice little kids.
But, no matter what you are reading in tonight's newspaper or from the scandal pages on the Internet, I had no relations with THAT woman.
Would I lie to you?
What do you think I am - some kind of politician?
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Image: THAT woman - from Pixabay dot com
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5 people like this
6 responses
THAT woman ... Monica?
@Ceerios (4698)
• Goodfellow, Texas
1 Nov 16
@LadyDuck - Ms Anna - Ah yes...Monica. I had believed that this kind of stuff stopped at Monica, but it goes on and on. Some of it is actual, and some of it is nonsense, but all of it is unwelcome to me. There are important things to be done in this world, and they seem to be less discussed than are the real and pseudo-pecadillos. 
-Gus-
-Gus-1 person likes this
@Ceerios (4698)
• Goodfellow, Texas
1 Nov 16
@jaboUK - Ms Janet - Some kids are nicer than others. I kinda like the little ones who seem to have learned how to say "Thank You" when they get a treat put into their basket. As to reading those "relation things" on the Internet, I'd prefer that the reporters and the writers would fill the network with football and baseball stories instead. The things that I run into these days on the Internet and elsewhere are worrisome to people of your age and mine. Maybe I just imagine that we were all so much better behaved way back when...
-Gus-
1 person likes this
@Daljinder (23193)
• Bangalore, India
1 Nov 16
Why should we believe you? You do have the picture of THAT woman. 
1 person likes this
@Ceerios (4698)
• Goodfellow, Texas
1 Nov 16
@Daljinder - Now then, kindly do not tell my bride about THAT picture, 
-Gus-
-Gus-
@Ceerios (4698)
• Goodfellow, Texas
1 Nov 16
@jennyjoy - Ms Jennifer - Yes. I did think about politicians.Sometimes I even feel sorry for politicians who must live lives pretending to never issue a single flatus by accident or on purpose. Better to be an unknown living a simple and productive life than to be continually on a stage and be subject to useless temptations. -Gus-
1 person likes this
