When I Want Your Advice, I'll Ask For it!
By jujunme
@jujunme (2501)
United States
May 1, 2017 3:12pm CST
Lately it seems that quite a few newcomers are complaining about members who try to advise them on making a go of it here or recommending them to read the guidelines . i have read things like, who are you, a Mylot cop?, or, ''you are not my boss'' and even ''why don't you mind your own business and worry about your own discussions, and so on....
While i haven't received such ''welcoming'' replies, due to all the complaining, i myself might think twice before trying to help some of the newcomers , since who needs to be insulted, just for trying to help.?
so how about you? did you ever receive these types of comments when trying to advise someone here? and if so did it discourage you from continuing?
7 people like this
9 responses
@Morleyhunt (21745)
• Canada
1 May 17
Most of the time Mylotters are only answering the invitation of the new Mylotter. Questions such as how do I earn? Or why am I not earning. I will give a helpful suggestion. If they ignore the suggestions and keep posting and posting with no interaction...I just ignore them and move on.
2 people like this
it's like interacting is too hard for them, but posting 10 discussions one right after another isn't , go figure 
@Morleyhunt (21745)
• Canada
2 May 17
@jujunme for some reason they just don't seem to comprehend that the interaction is where they could earn some money.
There's one today...first question they ask. Have you earned $50.00.
I wants to rsponses, but restrained myself. Sure I have....it just took me several months. If you are here only for the money...go and find a real job. This is pennies....earned while chatting.
1 person likes this
@LovingMyBabies (85127)
• Valdosta, Georgia
1 May 17
No I haven't been through it but I have seen plenty of that happening. It's awful that new people who join the site don't want to know how the site works. And don't want advice and help from others.
2 people like this
@LovingMyBabies (85127)
• Valdosta, Georgia
3 May 17
@jujunme I feel the same way. =)
1 person likes this
@sissy15 (12269)
• United States
13 May 17
People don't like when you tell them anything different from their opinion or when you try to help. I think we can all be like that to some degree. Sometimes it's more that people just believe different things and that's ok as long as you aren't completely rude about it. I try not to advise anyone unless they actually ask for it. I am sure I have at some point though but I always try to be super polite. As a general rule, I do my best not to offer too much help because people really don't appreciate it. Sometimes I get unsolicited advice too but I don't really take it to heart as long as they seem to mean well. I think we all have our days. Some days I'm more receptive to it than other days and sometimes I disagree but I can agree to disagree. The biggest issue with online is that sometimes you really don't mean to sound harsh but it can come off that way. I can't handle complete rudeness that's a pet peeve of mine so I do my best to not come off that way but I'm sure I've failed a time or two. Anyway, it sucks that you've had to deal with that. I like it here and for the most part, people have been very welcoming. I can definitely see where you wouldn't want to help anyone anymore though. I do my best not to unless they are actually asking. I try to avoid confrontation if I can but even I have my limits.
1 person likes this
@sissy15 (12269)
• United States
15 May 17
@jujunme It can be, and I always try to be respectful. I don't so much give advice but express what I have learned personally and I understand that just because something works for me doesn't mean it will work for someone else and I don't think everyone realizes that said advice isn't necessarily going to help someone.
I don't think we did interact, it's difficult to say. I didn't have nearly as much interaction with people back then but I had a few people that I regularly talked to and I do kind of miss that but I definitely have more people following my posts now. It does seem friendlier now but I do kind of miss the way certain things were set up back then. I feel like some things were easier to find then but I mean overall I'd say I like things how they are currently. I used to comment more than I posted but now it seems to be the other way around, but I try to make my rounds eventually.
@jujunme (2501)
• United States
15 May 17
@sissy15 Sometimes it can be the other way around as well ,the person 'giving' the advice can do it in a way that intimidates or comes off as bullying and in cases like that you can't blame the recipient for replying in a rude manner.that's why i believe if someone is giving advice it should be done in a helpful way
Wow!, 10 years i'm surprised i don't remember you, we probably just didn't interact much if at all. how do you like the new Mylot?do you think it's better than the way it used to be? i think it's much more friendly now.
@1hopefulman (45123)
• Canada
14 May 17
So far, whenever I have made a suggestion, it has been accepted with graciousness. Hopefully it will continue to be so.
2 people like this
@JudyEv (326776)
• Rockingham, Australia
11 May 17
I rarely offer advice and if for some reason I do I would usually send a PM. Same with pointing out mistakes. I usually only do this if the mistake is in the title and then I'll PM. As you've pointed out, not everyone welcomes any correction or help at all.
2 people like this
@jujunme (2501)
• United States
12 May 17
i really prefer being asked for help, since it seems to me although some newcomers appreciate the help ,some reject it and go on doing the same thing over and over.
however,sending a PM is probably the best way to go since even if the person rejects it , at least you made them aware of their mistakes
1 person likes this
@chrissbergstrom (10767)
• Banks, Oregon
2 May 17
Yeah i have seen some very rude responses on here, deffinitley not the way to make friends.
1 person likes this
@jujunme (2501)
• United States
2 May 17
I don't think they're looking to make friends here i have seen too many posts from newcomers asking how much money they can earn
they don't want to take any time interacting with others or to read the guidelines. then when someone tells them this is the only way to go, they get all defensive
1 person likes this
@jujunme (2501)
• United States
2 May 17
@chrissbergstrom and the ones who don't quit, post 10 or 12 discussions in a row,reply to none of their comments then ask why they didn't earn anything even though they were told 500 times how you don't get paid for simply posting discussions
1 person likes this
@chrissbergstrom (10767)
• Banks, Oregon
2 May 17
@jujunme Right i have already seen a few whom join and seemed to quit when they realized it wasnt easy to reach payout
1 person likes this
@dragon54u (31636)
• United States
1 May 17
No, I haven't experienced that. But I have decided not to waste my time being nice and explaining things to newbies. I often write 2 or more paragraphs of welcome, suggestions, and a link to the guidelines. Then they just keep doing the SOS over and over again. So if they can't read the guidelines, the heck with 'em. Let some other sucker reply and add to their meager, probably abandoned soon earnings. 
1 person likes this
@jujunme (2501)
• United States
1 May 17
They're not earning anything, don't read the guidelines nor do they read posts designed to help them so, i sometimes wonder why they're here in the first place.
I actually had someone ask me if i was admin just because i suggested the person read the guidelines since i knew the post would most likely be deleted ,their response was 'i'll just wait for the admin to decide'' ok, fine with me[em]thumbdown[/em
1 person likes this
@jujunme (2501)
• United States
1 May 17
i haven't experienced this either and to tell you the truth after reading some of the comments from these newcomers i have come to the conclusion they don't mind losing their posts since many of them post one discussion after another so losing a few doesn't matter to them
