I'm Tired of Hating My Family
By StacyB
@Srbageldog (7716)
United States
July 15, 2017 9:15am CST
For too many years I have hated my dad's side of the family. I have resented relatives when maybe there was no reason to. Maybe it was out of hurt, feelings of rejection that were misplaced from my childhood. But I am tired of feeling that way. After losing my cousin recently, I have realized that life is too short to carry around that kind of anger and resentment inside. In the end, it gets you nowhere.
So I am trying to make amends with my cousins. I don't know that I will ever be close to my dad's side of the family, but I can at least let go of the anger and resentment I've been hanging onto for so many years of my life. I don't want to be angry anymore. And I don't want to hate people just for the sake of hating them. I have not been the best family member myself, and I am in no position to judge. I can only hope that my cousins can forgive me and we can establish a better relationship. Sometimes you have to admit your own faults, and I am full of them. I am by no means perfect. I am not a great human being. I know this. I am trying to make myself better.
5 people like this
4 responses
@andriaperry (118793)
• Anniston, Alabama
15 Jul 17
I know this may sounds sad but I really don`t know much of my family, either side. My parents kept us away from them for some reason!
I was having something to do with a cousin I was kinda raised with that had a brain tumor at 16 but he is not right in the head now and gets on my nerves. All he asks for is a copy of ALL my photos, I do not have time for that, plus I mailed him some already but he claims he did not get them.
1 person likes this
@Srbageldog (7716)
• United States
16 Jul 17
My parents tended to stay away from both sides of my family too. On my mom's side, everyone is weird and reclusive, so I don't think it was anything intentional (plus most of my mom's family lived a couple hours away, so it was difficult to make it up there to see them when we had a very crappy car.) My dad's family often excluded us, but I don't know if it was intentional or not. We rented our house from my grandma and she lied to everyone and said my parents never paid rent, when they did (they always took us kids with them when they went out to her house to pay the rent, and they always got a receipt from her.) So I think a bunch of my relatives thought we were just a bunch of low-life freeloaders. (Thanks Grandma!)
It is difficult dealing with relatives when they are needy and pester you about things. It's not your fault your cousin didn't get the photos you sent him. I have relatives who get on my nerves too. I try to limit my interactions with them. One cousin is always getting himself into trouble, but he lives far enough away that I don't have to be dragged into it. Unless he comes out to California to visit family, then he gets mad when we don't all welcome him on our couches. When he was younger and still lived out here he was always demanding a lot from me (and our other cousins) and it got to where none of us wanted to deal with him at all. I love the guy, he's my cousin, but I don't like him.
@LovingMyBabies (85923)
• Valdosta, Georgia
15 Jul 17
I agree, life is too short. You never know what could happen from one day to the next. It's not good to be angry.
Your making improvements, that does make you a great person. =)
1 person likes this
@NJChicaa (127173)
• United States
15 Jul 17
Good for you! Family is important and we should all have communication and cordial relationships with each other, even if they aren't super friendly and close. I've seen all sorts of fights and cold wars go on on both sides of my family over the years and it is terrible. Eventually everyone realized that it gets you nowhere. Right now we are all on speaking terms. Some people are closer than others but, if something were to happen to someone tomorrow, I don't think there would be any major regrets because we are all speaking.
1 person likes this
