it's a sick world

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I had two days of annual leave last week. Because I work in education, term time only, plus six weeks paid holiday, I usually have to take my holidays at a given time, that being during ordinary school holidays when there is a lack of learners to support. However, having been in my current role for six years, I'm now entitled to the equivalent of three days paid annual leave. *squee* Last week I went back to work on Tuesday, following our two week Christmas break. That was okay because it was just a yawnifying Personal Development day, and included free hot drinks and Digestive biscuits, reward for having to sit through meetings and workshops. Wednesday and Thursday were then pure bliss. Being off work knowing that others are in work creates a feeling of insurmountable happiness. It gave me time to unwind following the frantic frivolity of Christmas. Completely guilt free. But this isn't the reason for this post. I have a competition going on in my head. Part of the competition is between me and all the colleagues in my department, but as it's in my head, they don't know about it. The competition is entitled, Who hasn't had a day off with illness for over two years? and the winner is Me. My prize? Self-satisfaction. But it isnt a smug satisfaction, nor a sense of superiority. The other part of the competition is between me and Me and involves never having to take a day off ill. In six years I've had three days off for illness, the last of those being in January 2016. I think I've done quite well for someone who suffers from depression and anxiety, who is easily stressed, and who only has one kidney. In fact, I think this makes me rather awesome and it's this feeling of awesomeness which keeps me going, even when the burden is too heavy, the tears want to flow and the body is certainly not willing. If I wake up not wanting to face the struggle, I remind myself that it's been *this* long since I was last off sick. Come on, girl! We can do this! I don't know if this makes me ridiculously stupid. I don't know if this will have consequences further down the line. I don't know anything. But if it makes me feel better in myself, then that's good enough for me.